All I Ask of You
by ablackwidow
Summary: Christine Fay has a list of her own rules she will follow until graduation. When she meets Rory Flanagan, what's a girl to do? Will she follow her rules, or break them?
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER I**

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><p><em>Rule No. 1) No more dating high school boys<em>

We were all gathered in the choir room for our practice. Or should I say that most of us were? Three of our singers were gone by choice; Mercedes, then Santana, and then Brittany. They were our rivals now, and for only being a three—four—woman group they were really, really good. Just the other day I went with Finn and Mr. Schue to scope out our new competition, and the girls' "Candyman" number was awesome. New Directions was in trouble yet again.

I wasn't paying much attention to what Mr. Schuster was talking about. I hardly ever did because he was either a) yelling at us, b) giving us a pep talk, c) talking about our next assignment in too much detail, d) talking about Journey, or e) telling us to take this seriously and step up our game if we wanted to win. I didn't know which one he was talking about this time because I was too focused on editing an entry that would go in tomorrow's paper. Tuesdays and Thursdays, that's when the new editions come out.

Kids eat the news a few others and I write about. It's awesome, but Figgins still threatens to shut the McKinley paper down. I've stuck with this bad-boy since my freshman year, I'm pretty sure I'll defend it until I'm gone. I glanced up when Finn walked in with someone else. I looked back down and continued with my editing; must have been someone else who wanted to join. As if it would help much, Mercedes and Santana were our soul girls. Finn began talking before taking a seat, again I wasn't really listening. He sat down in front of Rachel who sat in-between Kurt and Blaine who sat beside me.

The mood in the room changed almost suddenly when the new kid walked in. Now everyone seemed to be focused on him, waiting as the music started for him to sing. "_It's time for us to part. Yeah it's best for us to part. Oh but I love you, ooh, I love you._"

I noticed how my green editing pen slowed down as part of me listened to this kid sing. Slower, slower until I couldn't even focus on what I was supposed to be correcting. I set the pen down on the open page and lifted my head up to get a better look at the exchange student, Rory Flanagan. I glanced at the other faces in the room, everyone seemed happy, and it made me feel happy.

A small smile made its way onto my face as Rory continued to sing. All I could think of was how adorable this kid was; my eyebrows suddenly quirked up for a few brief seconds when Rory's voice rose to a falsetto. I looked at Kurt who didn't seem too pleased that he was no longer going to be the only boy with a high vocal range. "_It's time for us to part. Oh 'cause I love you, ooh, I love you. Take care of yourself, take care of yourself, take care of yourself. I love you._"

He had talent, I'll give him that. And to top it all off he's Irish and cute. Whoa…Christine follow your rules. No more dating high school boys. I was at war with myself. There wasn't anything in my rules that said I couldn't think boys were hot or cute or adorable, I just couldn't date them. There are so many more important things I need to worry about, like college and making sure that the McKinley school newspaper lives on even when I'm gone and graduated.

That's my one purpose for this year, oh, and moving on past Nationals (hopefully). But keeping this school paper alive is number one; number two on my own list of laws/rules.

_Rule No. 2) Journalism forever!_

The music had long since stopped, as did Rory's enchanting vocals. The smile on my face was an actual one, just like everyone else's. Finally, we all clapped, and a good thirty minutes later glee club was over and it was time for our next class. I had a free period, and for me that usually meant retreating to the newspaper room; a small office within the computer lab. In there I would finish all the editing and get started on uploading the final drafts into the computer.

It's harder than it sounds. Surprisingly, I'm not exactly the most high-tech teenager. I still have a flip phone that I've had since the sixth grade, and let's not talk about my laptop. I almost broke that thing three times within the first month I received it. It's sad, this is the era of intense technology and I don't even know how to work a basic computer.

"What'd you think Christine?" Rachel asked. I didn't realize that she, Kurt and Blaine were walking beside me.

"Oh, uh, he was really good," I said. "Looks like you aren't the only boy with a falsetto range Kurt."

"Whatever," Kurt said, holding back an amusing pout. Blaine, Rachel and I smiled.

"He's magical. I think he'll prove to be a very valuable asset to the team," Rachel said.

I waved once we turned down the hallway and entered different rooms. A senior class occupied the computer lab; I greeted a few of the students as I continued walking towards the side room. I liked to call it my office even though it was for all the newspaper staff, which was made up of a total of five students. If anyone wanted to find me all they had to do was go there.

I sat at the tiny round table and took out anything and everything that would be put in tomorrow's edition. And so the revisions commenced. I'll spare all the boring details of grammar, run-ons and the lack of detail. The window separating the computer lab from my "office" had the shades open. I could see the senior class working diligently on their papers, while some also goofed off on stupid websites.

In the lab I spotted Rory talking to the English teacher. I really hoped it looked like I was staring into space and not staring at him. I quickly looked away once Rory turned his head in my direction. I began typing up the interview I had with Ms. Corcoran about the new choir group she was directing called the Trouble Tones. I did the interview after Finn, Mr. Schuster and I watched their first performance.

Halfway through the interview I found myself looking back up, trying to see if I could spot Rory again. What is wrong with me? Okay, I'll be able to enter my stalker mode and get to know him, but it wouldn't be allowed to go further than that. High school boys were all jerks one way or another. That's why I made my rules at the end of my junior year last year. I have to stay on track, like I've said; there are more important things than just being in a relationship with someone.

Whenever I think of that I become kind of depressed. I think about Mike and Tina, and Rachel and Finn, and Blaine and Kurt, and Mercedes and her boyfriend. They're all so happy, but wherever there's happiness something's bound to go wrong. It's my decision in the end, and I'm sure to me it's all that matters. I spotted Rory now sitting at a computer, one closest to the window. He caught my eye; I waved and smiled because it was the nice thing to do. Something weird happened when he returned it.

Dammit! I mentally cursed. I focused my attention back on the word document I was working on. I didn't know the kid and I was already developing a crush on his looks…and his voice. When I get a crush, it's scary. I'm sure any girl would agree. You have those girls with crushes that stalk the guys they like, you have the ones who like to keep quiet, and then you have the ones that obsess. I'm not sure which of those categories I would fall under. I mean, I am a journalist and I do sometimes stalk…and obsess. Poor kid, if only he knew what goes through my twisted little mind.

You see, this is why I have rules; to keep myself in check. I saved the document and sighed, moving onto the next and glancing up at the clock. The hands weren't moving and I remembered that it was broken. I was sure there was still a lot of time left before the end of the day when play rehearsals would start. West Side Story, it was a big deal for us petty Glee kids. I tried cheering them up by saying that I was going to post story after story in the newspaper for its opening week about how awesome it is and how everyone should go see it. Happiness died down though when drama was just being dumped on us.

I don't think it would hurt to introduce myself formally to Rory. Maybe I could even wiggle out a story about the life of an exchange student. I would need his permission first of course, but still. It was all an idea, and a plan that I just might put into action. When? Well, I had no idea. After school? Why not?


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER II**

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><p><em>Rule No. 3) Stalking is illegal. Stalk only for stories<em>

I technically would get a story out of Rory Flanagan if I stalked him. I spotted him hanging around his locker as he dealt with his books and his bag. It was the end of the day and I wanted to corner him before I went to the auditorium to watch play rehearsals and worked on tomorrow's paper. I cleared my throat, fixed my hair and walked over to him with a smile on my face. "Rory Flanagan, I don't think we've been properly introduced," I said. He stared at me with that adorable look on his face.

"I'm Christine Fay, runner of the school's newspaper and part-time glee club singer," I continued.

"I know," he said. Oh gosh that accent… my mind trailed off and I cursed myself to stay focused. Stalk later, story now. "Finn's been telling me about everyone in the club. He told me that you can be a little crazy at times."

My cheeks began heating up, "That's embarrassing," I muttered. "I only become crazy when someone tries to take my paper away from me. Journalism is kind of my thing."

"I know that too," he said. This conversation really wasn't going anywhere.

"So how do you like America?" I asked.

"I love it. Sure I miss home, but America's great!"

"Minus the jerks and bullies of course," I reminded him. "You're lucky you haven't been hit with a slushy."

He looked at me funny. "I'm not the one who should be explaining this. I've only been hit three times in all my high school life; Rachel is your gal to talk to about that kind of thing… Kurt too… and Finn… and Quinn… and Puck…" I trailed off but quickly snapped out of my trance and smiled at him. "Sorry if I'm keeping you from something."

"Not to worry," he said. "Brittany has cheerleading practice, so I'm stuck here until she's finished." Rory shrugged his shoulders as if it were not that big of a deal.

"Sorry to hear that," I said. "I was just headed to the auditorium to watch play rehearsals, you're welcome to join."

Rory smiled that adorable smile and nodded, "Why not?"

When I want a story there's a short list that I follow to bend the other person to my will. 1) Never mention you want a story; 2) Friendly conversation is the way to go; 3) Casually bring up said topic related to the story; 4) Continue to ask questions because the other person is now open to it; 5) Record conversation! Don't write it! 6) Voila! Most of the time it's best that the people you're getting the story from don't know that you're a journalist; otherwise they'll hate you and want nothing to do with you.

"So how long are you here for?" I asked just as we walked into the auditorium.

Rory shrugged, "A few weeks I think. I wish for longer though."

I nodded, "Ireland must be beautiful; I've always wanted to travel to that side of the world. The farthest I've ever gone was Canada."

Rachel and Blaine didn't look too pleased as they stood on stage. Well, Rachel was standing with her arms crossed glaring at Artie, while Blaine sat on stage looking in random directions. Rachel spotted me as I led Rory and myself to the front row. She gave me a look that probably would have said something like, "Christine, I thought you didn't want anything to do with boys this year." I rolled my eyes and took a seat, Rory sat to my left.

"It gets pretty boring," I warned him. "Not even a week had passed and I knew most of the lines in the play. I like coming here to get my editing done."

"What do you usually write about?" he asked.

"Anything that comes to mind, plus sports; I'm forced to write about those," I shrugged and pulled out my notebook and green pen.

We fell into silence. I hated it. Why could I never keep a good conversation going, and with boys? It was like something important inside me shuts down whenever I talk to a boy. Is this why they hardly talk to me? I was sure there were other reasons, such as how I'm in love with journalism more than anything else, and I would do almost anything to get a story. I bit my lip.

I began focusing on my correcting, glancing at Rory every now and then. He stared at the characters on stage, but I knew he was bored. "You didn't have to come with me," I told him. "I was only being nice."

Rory smiled, "So was I. It's a habit, but I don't mind. It's far more entertaining than sitting out on the field having the football players taunt you and make jokes."

I sighed, "I don't understand their reasons. They make no sense, and popularity isn't a reason. They'll look like the jerks they really are once they get into college; if they do behave the same way."

_Rule No 4.) Compose a descriptive essay describing the different lives of underdog students and their treatments from high school to college._

It was an interesting topic. An article just wouldn't be enough of what I had to say about High School treatment, an essay would be much more suitable. I know what you must be thinking, what the hell is wrong with this girl? Of course it wouldn't take off immediately; I'm waiting until my junior year of college to get started. It's my idea of fun! "Just a few weeks to endure it and then I won't have to," was the last part of his sentence. I nodded, and then I just came out with it.

"Would it be alright if I interviewed you for the paper? I've always wanted to do one with an exchange student, but they either didn't speak English or were here for only a day."

Rory opened his mouth and closed it. "You don't have to," I added quickly. "It was just a question."

"Okay," he said. "I'll do it."

A huge smile broke out on my face. "Really? Sweet! Well, we'll need to schedule a time or something. Maybe we can do it this weekend so I can get it out for the Tuesday issue." I began muttering to myself about how soon that was, but didn't care. I stopped and looked up at Rory. "Sorry," I said. "I do that a lot."

Rory laughed, "That's alright. I thought it was…adorable."

Just kill me now. Did he really say that? To me? Oh god Christine, remember your rules! I glanced back down at my corrections and resumed them, a small smile on my lips. I could feel my cheeks growing warm. I mentally sighed. I could flirt all I wanted, but nothing would end up progressing past that, no matter how much I would have in the future liked it to. I crossed out details that I probably shouldn't have. I didn't care; Rory was the first guy to actually compliment me; not on my looks, but on my strange behavior. I knew now that this was the start of a beautiful friendship.

The person sitting behind us cleared their throat. Rory and I slowly turned around to see Kurt sitting back with a smug look on his face. Dammit, I thought. "Hey Kurt," I said. "You know Rory, right?"

"I don't believe we've been properly introduced," Kurt said. He looked at the other boy and smiled, "Kurt Hummel, and might I say you have an exceptional voice."

Rory grinned, "Thanks," he said.

Kurt then turned back to me, "Christine, can I talk to you for a moment?"

I had a feeling I knew what he was going to say, so I made my escape at the first chance I saw it. "Oh, look at the time," I glanced at my non-existent watch. "I need to get home and start typing these bad-boys up before tomorrow," I gave them both apologetic looks. "Sorry Kurt, maybe some other time?" I stumbled with my things, some papers flew out of my hands, and some became crumpled and bent. I ran up the inclined aisle towards the exit; one look back and everyone who was in the auditorium stared at me questioningly. This brings us to:

_Rule No 5.) Stop running away from situations!_

You could say that I "ran" all the way home. I mean, I did book it and didn't look back at the school. It took me ten minutes when usually walking takes twenty. I didn't live that far, and for that reason my dad and my step-mom thought it would be cool to not get me a car. "Exercise never hurts anyone," they would say. I fumbled with my keys, but I managed to open the door and walk in, throwing my things on top of the entry way's tiny table.

Both cars were in the driveway, which was strange. I tried fixing my papers so they appeared to be neat, and I blew out the candle before anything could catch fire. I walked down the small hallway that was decorated with pictures of the three of us, but mostly baby pictures of me. You can only imagine what it was like when people would come over for parties my parents threw; embarrassing. My friends tease me about it as well, but they think it's cute.

My step-mom was in the kitchen, hovering over a cup of coffee that was no longer steaming. She looked like crap; I wondered how her day was. Unlike most girls I never knew my actual birth mother; she died when I was young, and so I didn't mind that my dad ended up marrying another woman. At least he still loves them both, is what I always think. They didn't tell me the truth until I was a little old enough to understand. Even then I still accepted Rose as the mother figure in my life. She wasn't evil, she was nice, and she was a lawyer.

She heard me come in and looked at me; her gaze wasn't all that settling to me, something was wrong. "Where's dad?" I asked quietly. My heart was pounding; I hoped he didn't have another episode. No, he wasn't violent; there was just some strange medical problem he had that the doctors weren't really sure about.

Rose didn't answer; instead she picked up her car keys and led me outside. We were going to the hospital for the second time this week.


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER III**

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><p><em>Rule No. 6) Family first<em>

Unlike some people who take what they do too seriously, I like to put family first in everything. Might it hurt me in the future, of course, but I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep my family happy. Situations like these always make me nervous, but I tell myself to not think of the negative. All things happen for a reason, we just need to find out why. Our drive to the hospital was quiet, like it usually is whenever my dad has one of his seizures. In the past we never really knew what the cause was, today we were going to find out.

I hated the smell of hospitals; it was too clean. Others would usually go for the words, "it smelled like death," but that would make no sense, would it? I've seen it in books, and I've actually heard people say it before. If you wanted to smell death then I might suggest digging up a grave or visiting the morgue? We took the elevator down to the emergency room. I felt squeamish; my stomach did some weird things. I couldn't tell if it was because of nerves or because I was hungry. Rose walked towards the secretaries; there were three of them all seated in a half circle, surrounded by stacks of papers and manila folders, typing away rapidly on their keyboards.

I sat down on one of the uncomfortable bluish-green chairs and stared at the table of magazines. Most of them were ones I didn't read; car magazines, digestive health magazines, magazines for old people. The National Geographic one caught my eye, but I realized that it was the same magazine I've seen so many times on the trips to the hospital. I hoped he was alright, why shouldn't he be?

Rose took a seat beside me. The ER was unusually quiet. It must have been one of those days; slow, boring days. Why is nature cruel? Why do these things happen? Doctor Nathaniel appeared around the corner minutes later with a clipboard in his hand, as usual. "Mrs. Fay," he said. Rose stood up and I joined her right after. Doctor Nathaniel took a deep breath before speaking. It made me even more nervous.

"Is he going to be alright?" I asked.

He looked at me briefly before becoming interested in his clipboard. "We found a tumor in his brain. It's been growing. That's why we couldn't see it in the past, it was too small."

_A brain tumor_, I thought. My dad has a brain tumor. I didn't know if I should cry or what. I was confused. I didn't want to believe that this was the truth. A hand flew up to Rose's mouth, she was trembling and her eyes were glossy. I felt bad; she was holding back her emotions while I showed none. "With your permission and signature we can begin the procedure in the morning."

"Alright." Rose cleared her throat, "Alright."

Doctor Nathaniel had a look of sympathy on his face as he handed my step-mom the clipboard. It was quiet other than the pen scratching across the paper. We didn't ask if we could see him, we left after that.

The following morning I wasn't in my usual perky mood. Now that I knew my father was in trouble—surgery or none—things were different. I picked up the last batch of freshly printed newspapers. I walked towards the tabled and tied them up, labeling the stack with the appropriate homeroom. "You okay?" Tina asked. "You look like a zombie."

I turned my head. I didn't think anyone else would notice. "I'm fine."

_Rule No. 7) Journalists speak the truth_.

Oops. "I'm just tired. It was a long night."

Tina nodded. She picked up ten bundles, as did I and five other staff members. We took them to the main office to drop them off in each homeroom teacher's mailbox. The copies of the paper I was given went directly into a kind of portfolio; a binder of all past newspapers dating back to the revival of the McKinley Paper, which was during my freshman year. I put this together as something for future students of McKinley and journalists to look back on. It was a cool idea and others agreed. I only hoped that the paper would continue to live after I'm gone.

Jeez, how many times am I going to say that?

"At least tomorrow's Friday," Tina said. "Any plans this weekend?"

_Only praying that my father's surgery goes well_, I thought. "Nope," I said. "Nothing I can think of; maybe more college stuff?"

We parted ways. I entered my history class and handed my teacher the pass I was given. There was less than half an hour left of first block. I sighed and sat in my seat next to Rachel. She smiled, and like usual I returned it. I wasn't in the mood for one of our gossip sessions during history, and Rachel could easily see that. She didn't bring the topic up until after class where we lingered just outside the door. Other students trickled in and out of the room, on their way to their next class. I had calculus next; Rachel was going to make me late, again.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "You look bummed."

"I'm fine Rachel," I said. "Like I told Tina, it was just a long night for me."

Rachel's mouth formed a thin line. She studied me before nodding. She waved, "See you at glee club." We walked down opposite ends of the hall. I just so happened to spot Rory staring at a piece of white paper in his hands looking a little confused. The corner of my mouth quirked up for a few seconds; I walked over to him.

"Hi," I said.

Rory looked up and grinned when he saw that it was me. As cheesy as this might sound, it actually made me feel better than I was before. "Hey," he greeted.

"You look lost," I told him. "So I thought I'd offer you some guidance."

"I'm looking for the Spanish room," he said. "I didn't have it yesterday."

I nodded and smiled. I turned and pointed down the hall, "Go straight. Turn right; keep going straight until the first hallway on your left comes up. The room should be the third one."

Rory quickly patted my shoulder, "Thanks Christine." I watched as he hurried down the hall, dodging the hockey players and football players in the process. I turned back around and entered my math class. I wasn't late, I was almost late. I just entered the room with thirty seconds to spare before the bell rang. Kurt slid into the empty desk beside me. "Fantastic," I muttered as I began pulling out my things. I knew he was going to talk about yesterday, I just knew it.

"So about yesterday," he began. I rolled my eyes. "I wanted to talk to you about Rory."

I groaned it was loud enough that the two people sitting in front of me turned around and stared. I glared at them until they turned back around in their seats. "What about Rory?" I tilted my head to the side and stared at Kurt. I hope this wasn't going to be about my rules, does he really think I would break them?

"You do know you made an oath to yourself, along with those silly rules?" he said.

I nodded and began copying down some notes about derivatives. "There's nothing in my rules that said I couldn't make new friends, what's the problem?"

"Oh," Kurt said. "I saw the look on your face. I've seen it in the past as well, always around those boys you like." He smirked, I stared at him hard.

"What are you implying?" I scribbled down more notes and began working on the practice problem.

Kurt shrugged his shoulders and sighed, "Nothing, just saying that you should probably go for it."

I quickly turned my head, "What?" I wasn't expecting that kind of answer from him. I thought he was going to say that I should stick to my rules. Then again, he did say that my rules were silly. "Are you serious?"

Kurt nodded, "When aren't I serious?"

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "What about my rules though? I can't. Besides, Rory's only going to be here for a few weeks."

Kurt rolled his eyes, "Christine it's senior year. Act like a high school girl while you still can."

I shook my head. No. I made my rules for a reason. I can still have fun this year and obey my rules. It's not impossible. Kurt ended the conversation. We fell into silence as our math teacher continued to lecture us.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER IV**

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><p><em>Rule No. 8) Avoid chocolate at all costs<em>

By the time lunch rolled around Kurt still wasn't speaking to me. I knew it wouldn't be for long, but I still hated when he and I didn't talk. I sat down next to Finn who was in a very deep conversation with Rory. Rachel sat across from Finn trying to get his attention. Kurt sat at the other end of the table where Tina and Blaine were trying to talk to him. Mike and Puck talked about football, and Artie pulled his wheelchair up to my end of the table.

"Hey Artie," I said. I began pulling out my lunch; a sandwich, an apple a small container of some type of vegetable, and string cheese. I'm such a health freak.

"Hey Christine," he said, setting his tray down on the table. "You okay?"

I stare at him, "Fine. I was up all night editing and uploading." _Stop lying,_ I said. I sighed. I didn't want my friends to worry about my personal life; I didn't think it was worth it. "I'm looking forward to the musical," I told him. "It's going to be amazing."

Artie smiled and moved his lunch around on his tray. Correct me if I'm wrong, but he seemed nervous. "Opening night is Wednesday. We're more than ready." Somehow Artie didn't seem too sure of that.

"Trust me, everyone's more than ready. You've been a great director to them," I took a sip of my water.

"I'm still upset you decided not to interview us before the play," Rachel said.

"I don't have the time," I explained. "Besides, I thought McKinley's student anchor was supposed to make a visit last week."

Rachel and Artie glanced at one another. I take it the student anchor never showed up. "I'll be sure to make my review of the play as lengthy as possible," I promised.

"We have glee club next," Finn said, changing the subject. "Has anyone been working on their—his or her—assignment?"

I groaned, "Crap! I completely forgot about it." I glanced at Finn. "I do admire your grammar correction though." He grinned.

"It's not mandatory," Artie said.

"I know, but it's been a while since I last sang a solo," I said.

"I'd love to hear you sing," Rory said.

I blushed and smiled like an idiot, I held back the girlish giggles. "I'm not that good."

"Christine, stop denying it," Rachel had a knowing smile on her face, it made me uneasy. "She has a lovely voice; I'd describe it as operatic."

"Is that even a word?" Finn asked as he raised an eyebrow at his girlfriend.

"It is," I said, taking another sip of my drink. To clear things up yes my voice does sound like something an opera singer would sound like, but not completely. My voice is much softer than an opera singer. I started chewing on my tiny carrot pieces when a haunting aroma filled my nose. Finn had whipped out half a bar of chocolate. I stared at him intently as he broke off a piece and handed it to Rachel. Rachel paused mid-grab.

"Uh-oh," Rachel said. She threw the piece back at Finn; it bounced off his cheek and onto his lunch tray. "Hide it Finn! Throw it away or something!" Finn looked a little confused, was he not aware of my chocolate obsession? Rachel looked at me from the corner of her eye, she knew I was ready to leap onto Finn and snatch the chocolate away. Chocolate and Christine aren't such a great mix. Back during my sophomore year I worked at the square's chocolatier, and basically the workers could eat all the chocolate they wanted. It was awesome, but that's when my scary addiction began.

I gained five pounds on chocolate. I quit the job three months later because my friends were worried that I was going to go into a sugar coma or something. Seriously though, if you saw me then, it was pretty scary. I ended up writing an article about chocolate, it wasn't anything major it was just minor. I will never forget those days. Chocolate must be restricted from my sight at all times, otherwise I'll end up going crazy… but it tastes so good.

Slowly Finn lowered the chocolate bar. I think my stare was causing him to feel a little uncomfortable. I took a few deep breaths, "Well," I said. "That's the best I've handled a chocolate situation." Rachel smiled at me, Finn still looked uneasy, and Rory looked confused. "It's a very long story," I said to him.

"Well I'd love to hear it sometime," he smiled. WHY? I finally released the girlish giggles, but quickly shut my mouth before anything else embarrassing could come out. I caught Rachel's eye, and the worst feeling ever formed in my stomach. Really though, why me? Rachel pretended to become interested in her vegan salad, but that smile was still on her face.

"Follow your rules Christine," she whispered. I glared at her as she began giggling; Finn apparently picked up on the joke and smirked.

"Not a word Rachel," I said. "Not a single word. And don't say they're stupid! Kurt was telling me this earlier."

"But they are stupid," Rachel said.

"What are they talking about?" Rory asked Finn quietly. Finn shook his head and shrugged his shoulders in a way of saying that Rachel and I were talking about nothing important.

"You know you want to," Rachel continued. "You're just being stubborn."

I wanted to stomp my foot and say that I wasn't being stubborn. Instead I continued eating my lunch. Maybe they were right, maybe I am being held back by these rules. I slowly chewed on a baby carrot as I mulled over these thoughts. A part of me said, screw your rules break them! The other said you made them for a reason so follow them.

I glanced at Rory who was talking to Finn again. Their bromance was adorable, but as I stared at Rory I shunned myself for the deranged plan forming in my head. It was ridiculous, the two sides of my brain began fighting over it; one tried to defend it and the other continued reminding the other of the rules.

_Rule No. 9) If both sides continue arguing more than usual, seek help before it gets worse._

My thoughts didn't form the idea, _I_ did. And now that I think of it, it is both stupid and something worth trying. Brace yourself, here comes the crazy! If anything did happen between us I would date Rory in secret… what has my crush turned into? He would be confused as to why it's secret, but I would tell him why. I won't deny that there's something wrong with me, I've known that since kindergarten.

"Christine," Rachel said loudly. She must have been trying to get my attention while I was off inside my head. "Christine it's time for glee club."

"Sorry," I said. "I was just doing some thinking."

"Are you alright?" Finn asked.

"You're the fourth person to ask me that today." I stood up, threw my trash away, and walked with my friends to the choir room.


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER V**

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><p>The final three hours of the day were a blur. Glee club was uneventful except for the three performances others did in relation to this week's assignment. I attended class and didn't pay attention, and I also decided to skip out on going to play rehearsals. Over the course of that time I thought about my dad, wondering how he was holding up with his surgery. I'll admit, my eyes did tear over as I began putting things I wouldn't need this weekend into my locker.<p>

When I closed it, Rory stood on the other side. My hearty stopped. I wasn't expecting him to be standing there. "Did I scare you?" he asked with a smile.

I hope he didn't notice my eyes. I forced out a short laugh and said, "A little. What's up?"

"Only wondering when you wanted to do that interview with me," he said.

This time I smiled for real. "How about tomorrow afternoon? Brittany lives one street over from me, so you should be able to find house 337 without a problem."

"You're not staying?" his smile faltered just a tiny bit, but I still noticed. It made me feel bad.

"Family stuff," I shrugged. "Sorry to leave you here, but I'm sure Artie was looking for some extras to be in the musical."

He pondered this for a minute or two and eventually he nodded. I smiled. "See you tomorrow Rory."

* * *

><p>Rose was talking to someone on the phone when I walked into the kitchen. She didn't go to the office today, and I didn't blame her. Just yesterday we found out that my dad could possibly… well, you know. Rose didn't look crappy like I thought she would have; she was dressed casually with her hair tied back in a loose bun. She smiled when she saw me. I waved and started opening and closing things, wishing that some kind of yummy junk food would appear in front of me.<p>

"Alright Carol, see you soon, bye." Rose hit the end button as I turned around.

"Carol Hudson-Hummel?" I questioned.

Rose nodded. "I invited their family over for dinner. It just happened…" There was something else she wasn't saying. It was making her uncomfortable, but I had a feeling she told Carol what the problem was. My hands started shaking and my throat tightened up. Carol was bound to tell her family what happened… that meant Finn and Kurt would know. Would they tell the others? I didn't want everyone to feel sorry for me.

"Just let me know when they're here, I'll be in my room," I said. I marched up the stairs and left the door to my room open. I sat at my desk, turned my laptop on and pulled out my notebook. Rory was coming over tomorrow; I needed to come up with some questions to ask him so I could put the piece together. Thinking about Rory made me smile like some kind of obsessed idiot. I groaned and threw my head down on the table, the crush is real. I'll admit it; I have a crush on Rory Flanagan. Just don't tell that to Rachel or Kurt.

To my dismay I couldn't even touch Rory or get anywhere near him because of my rules. If my friends found out that I was breaking them, they might call me a hypocrite. I didn't want that. Not to mention, all the countless teasing that would happen if any of them did find out that I was somehow dating Rory.

I wondered why not many people liked him. What's not to like? Rory's sweet and down to earth and he's not a big jerk. He's… childlike, and adorable. That's the word I can use to describe him countless times; adorable. If I could I would run up to Rory and give him a big hug for no reason.

I moved back and forth between my conversation with Rachel about the musical and Sectionals, and my interview questions for Rory. I moved to the other side of my room and plugged in my recorder to charge for the night. It was easier using recorders than sitting and writing the interviewees words. Rachel sent another message; _and don't forget to vote for me for president!_ I groaned, how were we supposed to choose between our friends? Brittany, Kurt, Rachel and some other guy was running for the Senior President position. I still had no idea who I wanted to vote for.

_Sure thing Rachel_, I typed back. She sent me her favorite smiley. Downstairs I could smell something cooking, it smelled great. My guess was that the dinner would go both ways. The Hummel-Hudson's would provide, as would my step-mom. It was going to be fun, I told myself. Maybe they won't even bring up my hospitalized father. That was all I asked for, but I had a feeling Kurt and Finn were going to corner me about it.

I glanced at my computer screen typing back a final message to Rachel, _Gotta go set up for dinner with Kurt and Finn's family. See you Monday and talk to ya later!_

_Bye!_ After Rachel's message I signed off the messenger and joined Rose downstairs. I didn't even realize that a little more than an hour had already passed. Finn and Kurt's family weren't going to be here for about another two. "Need any help?" I asked.

Rose smiled, "You can start setting the table. The periwinkle colored napkins with the cream colored tablecloth, and the new silverware."

I nodded and walked into the dining room. The walls were light sea foam green, a round mahogany table rested in the center of the room with six matching chairs around it. A cabinet of the same material was on the left wall, the window facing the front of the house streaming in the late day sunlight. I opened one of the cabinet's cupboards and began pulling out the items Rose wanted to be set around the table.

The current center piece was a vase of white orchids. I began setting up the plates and smaller plates around the table, followed by the napkins and the silverware. I pulled out the wine glasses and water goblets from the cabinet and began putting them in their respective places around the table. When I finished I rejoined Rose in the kitchen who was hovering over her laptop.

"What are you making?"

"Roast and potatoes and other veggies," Rose said. She looked up from her laptop and moved over to the oven, checking on the roast.

"Smells great," I muttered. I was a hungry child. "I finished with the dining room." I wanted her to give me something else to do. Sitting down just didn't seem like something I should have been doing. I wanted to move around and keep busy. She told me there was nothing else she wanted me to do, so I went off in search of something.

Cleaning. I would start cleaning. I organized the living room so there were no extra coffee cups or stray wrappers or magazines all over the place. I moved slippers and lone shoes into the closet. I almost cleaned the entire downstairs when the doorbell rang. Rose beat me to answering it. I closed the closet as I shoved in the last of the shoes. I never realized how many each of us had until I spent the time rounding them all up. I heard voices from the front, so I joined them. "Hello Christine," they all greeted me. I smiled and waved.

"Hi," I said. Rose led the adults to the kitchen; I was left alone with my friends. I looked at Kurt, "Are you still ignoring me?"

"How can I now?" he asked. That was all I needed to hear to know that Carol told her family what Rose ended up telling her. I wasn't angry; I just didn't want the pity. My face began to sting and I could feel my eyes getting close to watering over.

"Christine, are you alright?" Finn asked. Five times I was asked that, twice by the same person and three times by different people. I shook my head and glanced up at him; he looked like a blurred blob because I couldn't see anything now that I was crying. Next thing I knew he was hugging me, and I was sobbing. Kurt was next. He rubbed my back and told me that my dad would pull through. I wished, I really did. Kurt and I were on the same boat, he almost lost his dad, but I still had the open option of him living or dying.

I pulled back and began wiping my eyes furiously with my hands. My face was wet and I knew I looked like a mess. I took a shaky breath, "I'll be right back," I said in a hoarse voice. I hated crying in front of my friends, it made me feel even worse than I did before. Why do I push people away?

_Rule No. 10) Let people in_

Everyone in glee club cares, we're like a family. I still have no idea why I'm so resistant to their help and care. Maybe it's because I've never had something like this happen? I never had something like this happen, I'm confused, scared. I feel alone. Jeez, I should write poetry or something. I was standing in the bathroom, letting the cold water fill up in my hands. I brought my face to it; the cold brought me to my senses. I used the small towel and patted down my face. I was thankful that I didn't wear make-up. Not that I usually do; I probably would have looked like a wreck if I did.

The dinner went smoothly; there wasn't a single mention about hospitals or brain tumors. We talked about our own future plans and of course Burt's campaign for the election. This brought us around to our senior elections. "You are voting for me, right Christine?" Kurt asked. He set down his fork and smiled at me.

"Yup," I said. I told Rachel the same thing. I was still unsure about who to vote for. If worse comes to worse and I can't make up my mind, I'll just vote for the jock who is also running. I smiled back and took a sip of my water. The conversation continued, we all did our best to avoid the sensitive topic at hand, but I could still tell that everyone was thinking about it, they were tense. They were even tenser after Kurt told the adults that I broke down crying and ran to the bathroom.

We retreated to the living room for coffee and desserts, the night was coming to a close, it was almost eight-thirty. Time flies, no? I sat in between Finn and Kurt on the long couch, and Kurt just so happened to bring up Rory. "I heard you two earlier," he said. "During lunch."

I couldn't have been more relieved. At least he wasn't yet aware of the fact that I was interviewing Rory… tomorrow… here… in my house. "And? Rachel and Finn both know that I like him," dang it. I should really watch my mouth. I just openly admitted it to friends.

Kurt grinned, Finn smirked and giggled. I punched his shoulder. "So what! Besides, he's leaving soon," I said.

"Yeah, in a big number of weeks," Kurt said. He smiled, "Wow, I knew you couldn't obey your rules."

"I am obeying them. Having a crush isn't one of the rules. I just can't date anyone."

"Do you want to date Rory?" Finn asked. I turned my head and glared at him.

"She does," Kurt said. "She so does." Kurt groaned, "C'mon Christine! Go out with him while you still can!"

I bit my lip and glanced between Finn and Kurt. I did this a few times before taking a deep breath and saying, "No."


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER VI**

* * *

><p>Rose was already downstairs the following morning. She was dressed up and running back and forth with a cup of coffee in her hand. I scratched my head and blinked away the sleep from my eyes. I looked like a troll; part of my hair was still in standing position from the way I slept last night. "Morning," Rose said. "I'm going into the office today; I probably won't be back until dinnertime. How does Chinese sound?"<p>

You can't really expect me of all people to be alert after waking up. My brain slowly processed Rose's words and I nodded, "Why not?" I yawned. I dragged my funky sock-covered feet into the kitchen and began poking around in the fridge for something edible. "Oh," I slowly turned around before Rose could walk out the side door. She paused and stared at me, I knew she was in a rush and I felt bad about the pace I was moving. "I'm having someone over today, if that's alright."

"That's fine," Rose said. "Just no wild parties."

"You kidding," I smiled. "I always have wild parties." I waved as she left. Rory was coming around noontime. That would give me plenty of time to spruce myself up and look nice for the interview. _Jeez Christine it's an interview not a date!_ I guess I got a little too excited. I made myself an omelet and watched my round of Loony Tunes with a nice glass of orange juice. My mind was slowly returning to me and after my shower I was awake.

To kill some time before my interview with Rory I looked over my questions, crossed them all out, re-wrote new ones, crossed those ones out and re-wrote the ones I had the first time. Why was I so freaked out over this? Why couldn't I contain myself while I thought about him? This crush was getting a little too out of hand, and these rules weren't making me feel any better about myself.

I half-paid attention as I did my homework. I went downstairs for some snacks and ended up watching some Bravo television. I was in the middle of an intense campfire challenge of Top Chef when the doorbell rang. I jumped and some cheese puffs flew onto the couch. I cursed under my breath and dusted my cheese coated fingers off on my jeans. The orange dust stained them, and I continue to brush them off as I walked towards the front door.

I smiled when I opened the door, "Hey Rory," except it wasn't Rory. The smile on my face fell when I saw that it was Rachel.

"Ooh, Rory's coming over?" she teased. Rachel walked in; I closed the door behind her.

"Rachel what are you doing here?" I asked her.

"Nothing much," she said. "I was bored and thought I'd stop by so we could spend some time together. Now tell me why Rory's coming over?" She stared at me with a glint in her eyes, she knew I liked him now she just wanted there to be something secretive between me and Rory.

"I'm interviewing him for the paper," I explained. "He's the first exchange student who wasn't here for one day and he speaks English. Does that answer your question?"

"Not what I wanted or was expecting but yes, it does. So when's he arriving?"

"Soon I think, I told him to stop by in the afternoon," I stared at Rachel, hoping she'd get the hint to leave. She didn't, she insisted on staying. That ruined my day dream of just spending the afternoon with Rory. Maybe I could lock her in the closet? I really did consider it, but I shook my head and followed Rachel into the living room.

"Top Chef, really?" she gave me one of those looks.

"I was bored," I said. "Oh, and you can't be here while I'm interviewing. Seriously you need to leave the room when I start the interview."

"Ooh, alone time with Rory and Christine, it sounds steamy. That should be a soap opera," she teased.

"Really Rachel this isn't funny! My crush is growing and I don't think I can contain myself any longer."

She sighed and placed a hand on my shoulder, "Then don't listen to your rules."

"You sound like Kurt… and everyone else."

The doorbell rang again and I suddenly became excited. "Disappear!" I shouted from the entry hall. I opened the door and continued to smile when I saw Rory standing on the other side. "Hello," I said. "Come on in." I opened the door wide enough for him to walk in. Rory slowly walked inside. I hoped that Rachel heeded my words and vanished from the living room.

I led Rory towards the dining room where most of my stuff was already set up. "Make yourself comfortable I just need to grab something from my room," I said. I ran up the stairs to find Rachel rummaging through my things. I rolled my eyes and removed my recorder from its charger. "Try not to break anything," I told her. "And stay up here until we're finished."

"Fine, fine," she muttered. "Can I use your laptop?"

My eye twitched. I never let people use my laptop; it was just an automatic reflex. "Don't touch the files," I said through gritted teeth. It was the only way to keep her up here and away from the conversation I would have with Rory.

I joined Rory who was glancing around the room before smiling at me. "Sorry about that," I placed the recorder on the table and sat in the chair perpendicular to him.

"Were you talking to someone?" he asked.

"No," I said slowly. Damn these hollow walls. "Let's begin shall we?" I pressed record and the interview started.

I began asking him the basics, what made him come to America? Why does he love America so much? How was he getting along at the school and the new American atmosphere? I knew he was lying when I asked him that question, but I took his word for it. "And do you miss home?"

"Of course," Rory said. "I try to get in contact with them every chance I get, which is actually often, but it would be nice to see them."

"What's it like in Ireland?" I ended up asking. It really wasn't a question I planned on asking him, it just slipped out.

"I dunno," he said. "I suppose it would be the same answer if I asked you what it was like here. Except I would say there's a lot of Irish people, and a lot of open lands. It's peaceful and quiet, not like America where it's cities and cars everywhere."

We both laughed, "That's true," I said. "I would love to visit Europe. It's on my list of things to do before I die."

"That's interesting," Rory said. He grinned, "You'd love it."

"My reason is mostly for history, but the beauty can also be a contributing factor," I said. I began doodling circles and cubes on my notebook.

"History geek, journalist, what else is there to this Christine I have yet to learn?" he asked.

I smiled. Wait, was he flirting with me? Oh god he's flirting with me! He is flirting with me, right? Christine whatever you do, don't encourage it! "There's a lot you still need to learn about me." Damn it, I encouraged it! And my giggling didn't make it any better.

I came to my senses and cleared my throat. I glanced down at my notebook and ended the recording. "Thank you again for agreeing to this," I told him as I shut my notebook. "Really, it means a lot to me."

"I was more than willing," he said. "There aren't many nice people at McKinley except for you and the glee club, and Brittany. I consider you guys my friends." I smiled at him, unsure of what to say then and there.

We both stood up and I led him to the door. "See you Monday, Rory," I said.

"See you Monday, Christine," he said. I waved and watched him turn the corner at the end of the street. When I could no longer see him I walked back inside and found Rachel standing behind me with her arms crossed and a smirk on her face.

"Stop it," I said. "Stop making fun of me."

"I didn't even say anything." I knew she just wanted to explode with it, but she was holding it all back. "Christine you're killing us here! You're rules keep getting in the way and the fact that you're actually listening to them is just making this situation frustrating! Ignore them; be with the adorable Irish boy. You know you want to."

I opened the door, slowly. She was right; I should ignore them and just go for it. Rory made me feel different. Not how I felt before when I was with those other two boys in the past. Cheesy I know, but I could be myself around Rory without him getting annoyed with my strange behaviors and personality. I sighed, "I think you should go Rachel. I'll see you soon."

Rachel didn't get angry; she nodded and gave me a small smile before leaving. I felt bad about it, but I just wanted some time to think and argue with myself about this problem.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER VII**

* * *

><p>Sunday night Rose and I were sitting in the kitchen as we quietly munched on our sushi. I spent the rest of my weekend locked away inside the house, thinking and arguing with myself about Rory and my rules. To be honest, I was starting to see through everyone else's eyes and decided that they were stupid, but I was still going to follow them. Rory wasn't going to be here for long, so why should I even bother breaking them? Yet, he made me feel different…<p>

I sighed and set down my final piece of spicy tuna. I glanced at Rose. "Do you think my rules are stupid?"

She glanced up from her TIME magazine and studied my face. She slowly chewed on whatever it was she ordered before answering. "You made them because you wanted boundaries. You wanted a drama free year. I don't think it's stupid, but if it's holding you back from something you really want then yeah, maybe they are." I groaned and chewed roughly on my final piece of sushi. I was in a lot of trouble with myself.

Monday morning I arrived later than I usually did. Instead of being at school by six thirty, I arrived at seven fifteen. I don't think you need a proper explanation as to what exactly it is I do during that time, but if you aren't aware, it has to do with the paper. I walked down the maze of hallways towards my locker. Rachel was the first person I spotted that day; even she knew something was wrong. "I never thought I'd see the day when a late Christine walked through those doors," she said. "Were you alright this weekend?"

"I was just doing a lot of thinking," I told her.

"About what," she asked.

I took a deep breath and pushed some hair away from my face. I was wondering if I should tell her or not. If I did, she might go blabbing to more than half of the glee club. If I didn't she'd be left in total suspense and probably plant her own thoughts into everyone's heads. I decided on my first option, which reminded me of that one rule I came up with but never really listened to.

_Rule No. 11) Don't be a coward_

Rachel opened her mouth ready to say something about my silence when I cut her off. "I was thinking of giving it a shot with Rory. If anything you guys are right to think that my first rule is the worst one I've ever come up with." I laughed at myself, "To think that I could have gotten away without dating someone this year."

Rachel's mouth slowly formed a grin. She started shaking; her little hands were balled up into little fists. She was just about ready to explode with joy and excitement. I knew she wanted to run off and find the first person from glee club to tell them what I wanted to do. Let's be honest though guys, is my crush on Rory really that obvious even if I haven't admitted it out loud? It probably was, I knew I wasn't good at keeping those kinds of things locked up and silenced.

Rachel stepped up to me; we both linked arms and skipped towards our first class. We didn't really skip. Rachel tried to skip but I said no. Kurt was the first person we spotted upon our arrival to Physics. "Kurt! Kurt guess what?" Rachel still had that smile planted on her face. Kurt and Blaine both shared a look before focusing on Rachel. Before Kurt could even guess or ask what the girl was so happy about she finally exploded in a shower of many words. "Christine agrees that her first rule is stupid and she's going to give it a shot with Rory!"

"Really when?" Kurt smiled at me, and I was thankful that his wasn't as creepy as Rachel's. It kind of warmed me inside when he smiled. He knew I finally came to my senses. That's all he could have wanted I suppose.

I shrugged, "No idea."

"You should do it today, after school," Blaine suggested. "That way there really wouldn't be anyone around and you would have no reason to feel embarrassed if any one of us were there." I considered it as we walked into class and all sat at our group table.

"Seems quite reasonable," I said. We ended the conversation on that note. Whenever I would think about Rory or the plan I got butterflies in my stomach. It was either the nerves or the happiness I felt when I decided on the idea. I made my own mental note:

_Rule No. 12) Ignore rule no. 1_

Finally, right? I did my best to focus on the work we were given, but let me tell you something: Physics makes no sense to me! It's strange, difficult, and mind-boggling. What I wouldn't give to take Chemistry again. I would take that class again in a heartbeat if I were given the chance. I tried copying down some answers from Kurt, but he covered his paper up. "It's classwork not a test, Kurt," I said.

"I know, but I hate it when people read over my shoulder. It's not that hard Christine, they're just simple equation problems," he said. I glanced down at my sheet where the variables representing many different things began blurring together. I slammed my head down on the desk, but not so hard as to draw attention from others.

"I can't do this," I said. Physics was the one class I allowed myself to slack off in. The teacher couldn't teach so I saw no reason to give it a shot. It might have been simple, but I wasn't exactly the kind of person who could handle so many variables. Even calculus doesn't have this many variables! Calculus was easy, this was damn near impossible for me.

After Physics, I followed Rachel into our history class where yet another hour of my life was wasted. Instead of focusing on the review worksheet, I was thinking about all the articles I was going to have to edit before tomorrow's edition. Not to mention, the school musical was very soon. I turned to Rachel, "Nervous, excited? Opening night is only two days away!"

Rachel smiled, "It's all I could have wanted." Her smile faltered a little, I remembered the whole situation she and Mercedes were having about who would play the leading lady Maria. Rachel was an aspiring star, she could have cared less if someone liked her or not. She loved acting and singing, her sole purpose for getting through high school life was to make it to the top. To show everyone that she would stop at nothing until she got what she wanted. If you wanted what she did, well you better move fast and you better not hesitate.

I have to admit, I was a little jealous of Rachel. She was always in the spotlight with the solos and the leads. Most of us hardly ever had that chance to stand in the spotlight. It wasn't something I desired, but it would have been nice to just get a small taste of it. I made an oath to myself that if anything mentioned about the Phantom of the Opera, I would be on board with that in a heartbeat. Phantom is my secret lover. I knew all the words to the songs, I admired that my name ended up being Christine; I've seen the play so many times. Not on Broadway, but minor productions here and there. Seeing it on Broadway would be amazing; one of the many things on my bucket list.

"Christine I'm so excited! It's going to be great!" I nodded at her words. After the failure of Rocky Horror last year, this year was the first legit school play that would reel in hundreds of dollars. I mean, it's West Side Story for crying out loud. I chose not to participate in the play this time because I was going to have to review it. It wouldn't be fair if I were in it and wrote a review praising the play. It had to be a biased review. And like any good journalist you obey the rules of journalism.

Up until fourth period, things were boring and uneventful. During that time I was hoping to at least see Rory and tell him that I wanted to talk to him after school. I sighed and flipped through my French workbook. Kurt sat to my right and Quinn sat to my left. I seriously thought that today was going to be just like every other day. I didn't want it to happen, and I was sure as hell I made a rule that said I shouldn't cry in public.

The shorter version of the story goes as followed. We were sitting in class being lectured on the correct conjugation of IR verbs when the door opened. Ms. Pillsbury and Mr. Schuster walked in with grim looks on their faces. Last time something like this happened was when Kurt's dad had that stroke. I didn't think it was going to be me they called up. My heart began pounding double time and all I could hear was the blood coursing through my ears. Mr. Schuster said my name, and that's when I broke down crying in the middle of class.

I wasn't sure; my dad could have been alright and I was just overreacting, but I just knew that he didn't make it through his surgery. I ran out of that room after I picked up my things. I didn't give Kurt or Quinn the time to comfort me, I just ran. Rose stood in the office, Mr. Schuster and Ms. Pillsbury ran behind me as they tried to keep up. Rose hugged me tightly. Everything around me was like some really depressing scene in a movie. I blocked out all sounds, I couldn't think straight; I just cried. For how long I didn't know. Rose took me out of school, and when we got home the both of us broke down in tears.

My dad was my best friend and now he was gone.

* * *

><p>Rachel walked up to Kurt in the halls, "Where's Christine?" she asked. They were headed to glee club. Kurt was about to answer, but as they entered the room everything was quiet. No one moved in their seats or spoke. The Troubletones were there as well. Mr. Schuster looked terrible; he stared off into space, patiently waiting for the remainder of the students to arrive. So far it was only Quinn and Kurt who knew what had happened, or had an idea of what happened. Kurt took his usual seat beside Blaine, still no one spoke.<p>

"What's going on?" Brittany asked as she walked in with Santana. They were the last to arrive. Mr. Schuster gestured for them both to take a seat before he began talking.

"Wait, where's Christine?" Rachel asked. She was just as confused as everyone else.

"That's what I'm going to talk to you about," Mr. Schue said. He sighed. "Over an hour ago Christine's father passed away during his surgery."

_Her father was in surgery?_ Rachel thought. _Why didn't she tell me?_ Why didn't she tell anyone? Rachel looked down at her hands folded in her lap. One of her best friends was suffering, and she couldn't do anything to help comfort the girl. "I'm not sure if she'll be here tomorrow, but I just wanted to tell you to take it easy on her. Let her know that you're all going to be there for her no matter what. We are a family."

"Why didn't she tell us that her dad was in surgery?" Mercedes asked.

"She probably didn't feel comfortable," Finn said. "Our family went over for dinner after Christine's mom told my mom about the surgery."

"You knew?" Rachel said. She was just as shocked. Christine and Rachel shared almost everything. "Yet you didn't say anything?"

"She didn't want a pity party. I guess she was scared, she's never had to deal with something like this before," Finn said.

Rachel slowly turned her gaze away from Finn. She stared at the floor. All she wanted to do was run and find Christine. She wanted to tell her friend that everything was going to be okay, that it wasn't the end of the world. Yet, she couldn't. Whenever Christine got upset she would hide herself away from the world. How long would she hide this time?


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER VIII**

* * *

><p>I didn't leave the house that week, except for the funeral. Rose wanted me to see a psychiatrist; she thought I was depressed. She feared that because of my father's death I would do something to hurt myself. I wasn't depressed, and I didn't need to see anyone. I was just having trouble accepting the fact that my dad wouldn't be walking through the front door anymore. This was my worst experience by far. Nothing can beat the death of a loved one, it just damages you. I hoped that soon I would find something to push me forward. I shouldn't dwell in the past. And I know it's something my dad would want me to do.<p>

Because I didn't leave the house for a week there were no new McKinley paper editions released. Friends called multiple times, but I avoided my phone and my computer. I even told Rose to not answer the door. When Wednesday rolled around, Rachel saved me a ticket and left it in the mailbox. I didn't go to opening night, nor did I attend the play on the other nights. I felt horrible, I was angry with myself for letting these things happen. Rory was the last person to cross my mind. To think that things between us could have progressed if not for my father's accident.

The funeral took place on Friday afternoon; the first time I left the house and the first time I came in contact with everyone from glee club. They left school with guidance from Mr. Schuster and Ms. Pillsbury; I did my best to avoid them during the ceremony. I sat awkwardly in the church between Rose and my grandparents on my dad's side. I wasn't all that big on religion, it made me feel out of place. I sometimes thought it was silly for people to believe in some higher power that you can't see, or have no record of existing. But I won't deny now that I see why people created these figures to believe in. All we need is some faith to get us through the hard times.

After the ceremony I traveled with Rose and my grandparents to the cemetery where the burial would take place. Rose ended up walking away to talk to others who came to pay their respects. Someone placed a hand on my shoulder. I turned around and saw Rachel. She gave me a tiny yet comforting smile. The two of us hugged. Behind her I saw everyone from glee club and from the Trouble Tones; Mercedes, Brittany, Santana, Sugar, Mike, Tina, Finn, Quinn, Rory, Blaine, Kurt, Artie and Puck, and Sam. Who knew that in just a few days you could miss so much?

Rachel and I didn't share any words; everything was mostly gestures between us. Before they lowered the coffin into the ground, everyone with flowers placed theirs on top of the coffin. Rose handed me a white orchid which I placed on top after everyone else. I stood there and watched as my father's body was lowered into the ground. Tears leaked from my eyes, I had that coming. I was going to see my friends off, but Rose got to me before I had the chance. I hoped that by Monday things would be better. I've missed so much already, my subconscious was starting to tell me to move forward.

That was my week summed up in a few short paragraphs. Monday morning rolled around and I didn't want to get out of bed. It was eight o'clock and Rose walked into my room. I was happy she didn't push anything onto me; I was happy that she gave me my own space and time to think things through. "Are you ready to go back yet?" she asked softly.

"Yeah," I muttered. "Just not right now, can we drop by this afternoon?" I had a little something in mind I wanted to share with my friends. Not to mention, if I stopped by during glee club they would be the first to see me back.

Rose studied me as if she knew I was planning something, "Alright. We'll leave at twelve forty-five," she said. I smiled at her as she walked out of my room. I sighed and rolled out of bed. The time would be just after lunch and right before glee club. What I was planning to do was sing a song, it was the perfect song choice that popped into my head, and of course it would be from Phantom of the Opera. Christine Daae lost her father when she was young, and in that scene as she walks through the cemetery she sings "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again," my second favorite song in the entire play. It might seem weird, but it just fit perfectly.

So as I danced around my room looking for something to wear, I began singing the song, just to prepare myself. I showered and sang, I dressed and sang, I ate and sang. I locked myself away in my room and sang there. I cleared my throat and stopped, didn't want my voice to escape me all too soon. I glanced at my backpack sitting in the corner; I didn't think I would need it if I was only staying for glee club, which was last block. When it was time to leave I hopped into the car, feeling a little bit better about myself. See, I didn't need professional help; all I needed was some time on my own to heal.

I had to admit, I was kind of nervous about going back. I didn't want to be hounded on by everyone with their comments and questions and constant "how are you's" and "are you well's?" It didn't take us long to get to the school. Rose walked into the office with me in tow. She signed me in and told me that she'll be waiting in the parking lot. I left her in search of the choir room. My guess was that last period had just started. I lingered just outside the door and peaked through the window. There they all were, sitting and listening to Mr. Schuster as he went on and on about well, whatever it was he usually goes on about.

Santana, Mercedes and Brittany were all in there too; my guess was that the Trouble Tones were now a disbanded group. I had butterflies in my stomach; all I could think about was how they would react. I had to do this, no turning back now. As quietly as I could (yet failing to do so) I opened the door. I walked slowly, their gazes turning away from the lecture Mr. Schue was giving them and onto me. They looked stunned and confused, as if what they were seeing wasn't real. I smiled, "Am I interrupting?" I asked.

"No," Rachel said. She was the first person to stand up and run over to me. "I'm so glad you're back!" The hugs followed after that, and it was better than I originally thought it would have ended up.

"We're happy that you're feeling better Christine," Mr. Schue said.

"I'm happy too," I said. "And if it's not a problem I was wondering if I could sing something?"

"Go for it, the floor is now yours." He took a seat and I took a deep breath.

"This song is one of my favorites, and it really does remind me of my dad in a lot of ways, but it also gives me a message that even though I can't bring him back, I shouldn't dwell on the past. I need to learn how to move on and only think of the good that used to be, not what happened to him personally." I walked towards our fellow pianist and handed him the folded up music sheet I had in my pocket.

"_You were once my one companion, you were all that mattered. You were once a friend and father, then my world was shattered… Wishing you were somehow here again, wishing you were somehow near. Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed, somehow you would be here."_

You know what I just realized? This is the first time that Rory's ever heard me sing. I tried to push back the blush rising in my cheeks, but how can you do that really. I focused more on the song than the blush, playing it off that I didn't even notice it. Hopefully no one realized it was because I was staring at Rory, I only did it for a few seconds!

"_Wishing I could hear your voice again, knowing that I never would. Dreaming of you won't help me to do all that you dreamed I could. Passing bells and sculpted angels, cold and monumental seem for you the wrong companions… you were warm and gentle._"

Now that I focused back on the song my eyes did sting and glaze over, but no tears fell. I took a deep breath during the silent part of the song before resuming with a much stronger voice like in the play, and the movie.

"_Too many years fighting back tears, why can't the past just die? Wishing you were somehow here again, knowing we must say goodbye. Try to forgive, teach me to live, give me the strength to try. No more memories, no more silent tears. No more gazing across the wasted years... Help me say goodbye…_"

Quieter I finished the song, "_Help me say goodbye._"

I looked at Rachel who had a satisfied smile on her face. Everyone clapped and I waltzed over and took my empty seat in the back. As I walked past some of the group they congratulated me and complimented me for the song and for getting through the tough situation all by myself. "That was wonderful Christine," Mr. Schue said. "Now that we're all here together I think it's a good time to start talking about Regionals!" This got a round of cheers from the group.

I ended up catching Rory's eye again, he smiled at me. I smiled back and gave him a short wave. Maybe I could give it a shot now? I sighed, _take it slow Christine_.


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER IX**

* * *

><p>On Tuesday I was back to my normal routine. The paper was on hold that day, meaning it would be extra thick by Thursday's release. It felt good to write again. I finally managed to piece together the interview with Rory into something short and simple. Did I ever mention that we've started to become friendly with one another again? Just during our free period, which I didn't know we shared, we were sitting and talking the whole time instead of doing our homework. He was the only person who hadn't asked me if I was feeling well, or better, or alright. And I respected that completely. I liked that he didn't push the thought of my father's passing onto me. It made me wonder if he was just that nice of a person or if something similar had happened to him.<p>

There was a lot about Rory that I learned, and he too learned a lot of things about me. It was lunch time and no one had arrived yet. This meant that these final precious moments I had alone with Rory would soon be up. "You have a very lovely voice Christine," he said. I glanced up from my brown paper bag and smiled at him. You could say that I blushed. "Hearing you sing was very refreshing."

I let out a laugh and shook my head. "No, no, no. Hearing you sing is refreshing." It was his turn to blush. The corners of my mouth quirked up, "You have a serious gift." I slowly began pulling out my lunch as students filed into the cafeteria. I spotted Rachel walking arm-in-arm with Finn. She had that grin on her face as they sauntered over to us.

"Hello Christine, Rory," she sat down beside me. Finn looked longingly over at the lunch line, but Rachel was still holding onto his arm. Her grin wasn't directed to me talking to Rory, this had to do with something else.

"Hi Rachel," I said carefully. Rory waved. "What's up? Oh and if you haven't noticed, I think you're boyfriend's hungry."

"I've noticed," she said. "We just really wanted to tell you something. It's a surprise, but we need you to go down to the auditorium right after school."

I raised an eyebrow at her, she was still smiling, but she wasn't the only one. As the other members of our glee family arrived they too were also smiling whenever they looked at me. It was starting to creep me out, and I was itching to know what the heck they all knew that I didn't. I glanced across the table at Rory, "Do you know what's going on?" He had a childish smile planted on his face as he sipped his milk through the straw. I loved my friends, but sometimes they just drove me crazy. Guess I was going to have to wait until after school.

"So Christine," Finn said. "Rachel tells me that you're not going to listen to your rules anymore. Is that true?" He was smirking and I could feel my cheeks flush.

"It was only one rule for your information. I agreed that it was stupid. The others aren't so stupid and make sense for me to follow," I said.

"Which rule aren't you going to follow?" Rory asked. I had previously informed him about my past years and me finally deciding to form these rules to keep me in line and drama-free. I never really told him my list of rules, and I was happy that I didn't. The color was returning to my cheeks now, and it was worse that mostly everyone at the table was listening in on the conversation.

"Uh," I dragged out the sound. "Um," I dragged that one out too. I laughed nervously; I really didn't want to tell him because that would be a dead giveaway about me liking him. "Is it getting warm in here? Was that the bell?"

"Lunch just started, Christine," Kurt said. He had a satisfied smile on his face. Cut me some slack will you? I wanted to say. My rule popped back into my head, the one that said I should stop running away from situations I find uncomfortable.

I sighed and took a deep breath. "My first rule," that was all I said. Finn and Rachel high-fived each other, Kurt clapped his hands and smiled as if he were applauding, and Rory looked confused. At least he didn't ask what that rule specifically said. We continued on with lunch, I was too embarrassed to even say anything else for the rest of the time being. I would get small smiles and smirks sent my way. My stomach exploded with butterflies when I realized what was really happening.

I was ignoring rule number one completely. I really liked Rory Flanagan. Rory liked me for me. This was going to go somewhere in the future, I could feel it. I glanced down the table and I really wished I hadn't. Sugar, the rich girl with Asperger's was staring at someone else at the table, she was making it quite obvious, and I knew she wasn't staring into space. My head followed her gaze to Rory. I ended up snapping my spoon accidentally.

Ah jealousy, I thought I hid you away. Guess not. I tried to calm myself down, saying that it was no big deal. Ugh! Why do crushes make girls go crazy and paranoid? My left leg muscles began twitching and quivering. It was uncomfortable and even as I told myself to calm down I was still on edge about Sugar staring at Rory. I couldn't really stand up to her about it, I mean Rory and I weren't even a thing. I told myself to push it out of my head and leave it behind. It was probably nothing.

After lunch, I attended French with Quinn and Kurt where we sat and daydreamed about our own things. The class was usually uneventful, I was glad when the bell rang. It was finally time for Glee club. I tried to keep my distance from Rory; I didn't want to make anything more obvious than it already was. I smiled at him as he walked in and I felt that burst of butterflies again when he smiled back at me. It bugged me again that Sugar sat behind him. It's nothing, I told myself. Ignore it. Rachel walked in and sat down beside me. She was smiling that smile again.

"Excited for after school?" she asked.

"I would be if I knew what was happening after school," I reminded her. "Please tell me." I pouted and she giggled.

"Then it wouldn't be a surprise! Still, even if you don't know you should be excited. I know I'm excited," she sighed. "I only wish Mr. Schuster would get here and that this class would be more than halfway finished!"

I looked at her. Was she talking crazy? Never in my life would I have thought Rachel Berry to say words like that about the glee club. This club was her lifeline. If it ended up dying, she'd probably die too. I shook my head. That was one awkward moment I shared with myself. I should stop thinking about death… dammit!

Mr. Schuster walked into the room, ready to discuss with the class their ideas for Regionals. Nationals seemed so close yet so far away. Hopefully this year we would walk away with something. Winning would make our senior year all the more worthwhile. Mr. Schuster launched off into a long speech about Regionals and something about a spring musical.

Rachel clapped enthusiastically. It would give her one more shot center stage. The room erupted into sudden questions, but Mr. Schue refused to answer any of them. He said he'd promise to let us know in January, which was a good two months from now. I ran a hand through my hair, wanting to know more about the secret surprise than about a play happening many months from now.

We switched officially into Regional's mode. Mr. Schue split us up into two groups. The first group consisted of me, Mercedes, Finn, Quinn, Kurt, Brittany, Mike and Blaine. Group two was everyone else: Rachel, Sam, Tina, Artie, Santana, Puck, Sugar and Rory. Was I upset that those two were in a group together? Possibly. But I didn't let it show. At least I don't think I did.

We spent the remainder of the class brainstorming themes and song choices. Why in groups? I don't know, but my theory is that Mr. Schue wanted to get everyone involved. Instead of doing the discussion as a whole class, everyone would be able to share input by being in small groups. I found myself stealing glances over at the other group. "Christine, now's not the time to be daydreaming about Irish exchange students," Kurt said in a sing-song voice. Blood rushed up my neck and into my cheeks. As long as the other team couldn't hear what he had said, it was fine by me. If they had, my life would end in humiliation.

The time flew by quickly which was something I wasn't expecting. Rachel stopped me as I gathered up my belongings. "Auditorium in ten minutes," she held up both hands and grinned before skipping out of the choir room; her skirt flounced around her and her hair swished from side to side. I sucked in some air and released it as I pushed my bangs to the side.

Well, this is it. Time to find out what this big surprise is.


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER X**

* * *

><p>I opened the door to the auditorium. It was empty and the stage was dark except for a single spotlight to the far left of the stage. I walked slowly down the aisle. It was quiet and I began to wonder why Rachel and everyone else wanted me to come here. It was strange because I was the only one in the auditorium. I walked down to the first row, and there I saw it. Right in the middle of the row was a piece of paper that read: Reserved for Christine Fay. I assumed that this was the paper they used opening night.<p>

A tiny smile formed on my lips. I set my bag down on the floor and took the paper off the chair, folding it up in my hands. I sighed and took a seat. The room was really quiet. The spotlight on the stage faded away and the whole theater was dark. I would have been freaking out on any other day, but I had a feeling that I knew what this surprise was.

I managed to get comfortable in my seat before the main stage lights blazed to life, temporarily blinding me. I blinked a couple of times as the introduction theme music began playing and the Jets began their dance on stage. It never really dawned on me that my friends cared _this much_ about me. We are one big happy family of singers and performers, we are all outcasts, and we are always there for each other. My face began stinging, that's when I knew the tears would start welling up in my eyes.

My ey0se did glaze over, making the stage and the people on it blurry. I had this stupid smile on my face which was starting to hurt. I wiped my eyes and dimmed down the intense smile to a smaller one as I watched the scenes unfold. The final product was indeed the best thing ever, even if this performance was a complete surprise. As I suspected Rachel and Blaine were both flawless, as was the rest of the cast. I do admit, I had my tiny round of giggles as Rory tried to mimic a Spanish accent. Didn't work out too well, but it was cute.

The play commenced and the scene where Anita and Maria have a talk about Tony just started. Someone took a seat behind me. I didn't turn around; I kept my focus on the play. I did smile when I heard the person's voice. "Liking the surprise?" Rory whispered.

I nodded my head, "Loving it. I can't believe they went out of their way to do this again." Ah, damn. I was tearing up again. I was thankful that Rory couldn't see me getting ready to cry. "See," I said. "I "I told you they would need you on that stage." I turned my head to the side and grinned.

"I was terrible," he said. "Once again I failed to nail my only line."

I shrugged, "I thought it was cute." Cue internal explosion of butterflies. Who knew I'd feel like that whenever I would flirt back with a guy. I suppose I forgot and removed it from my head when I initiated those rules. I focused back on the remainder of the play. By the end my eyes were glossy, but I didn't cry. The music ended, the stage dimmed until it was completely dark. I stood up and waited for the lights to come back on. When they did, the stage was crowded over with everyone who was in the play.

I began clapping. It might not have been a loud and thunderous audience clap, but I gave it my all. Rachel ran forward and jumped off the stage. The two of us hugged each other tightly. We pulled back and smiled at each other. "That was amazing," I said to her. I looked at the others, "You were all amazing. I was really surprised. Thank you." I told myself I wasn't going to cry, but does listening to yourself ever really work out? Rachel hugged me again.

"Anything for another chance on stage," she said.

I rolled my eyes, "You'll get that chance in the new year. Spring play," I said, reminding her. The stage slowly cleared off as everyone returned backstage to change out of their costumes and find rides home.

"How could I forget," Rachel said. "See you tomorrow, Christine," she waved and I waved back. I turned around, surprised to see Rory standing there. For the moment, I actually forgot he was still there. He seemed like he was up to something. I stared at him with suspecting eyes.

"What is it?" I asked. "You look like a kindergartner who did something they shouldn't have."

Rory smiled that adorable smile. He shoved his hands into his pockets and walked from the row behind where I sat, to where I stood. My heart was pounding and I could hear the blood bumping in my ears. It was silly of me to think he was going to kiss me, but I was immediately thinking of those horrible teen movies where things like that usually happen. "Well, it's winter and all, and I was wondering…" he trailed off.

"Yeah?" _Oh god, is he going to ask me out? What do I do? How do I respond?_ I tried to calm my inner self down, but it wasn't working out too great.

Rory scratched the back of his head. This cuteness overload was killing me. I wouldn't be surprised if I just dropped dead before he could finish his question. "I was wondering if you would like to go ice skating with me this weekend… it was something I always did back home, and Brittany was going with Santana, and I kind of didn't want to be there by myself so I decided to ask you."

"Yes," I said quickly. "I love ice skating!"

Rory's smile widened, "Really, great!" We stood there for a few seconds in an awkward silence. Rory bid me goodbye and I stood in the auditorium alone, smiling like an idiot. Let's be honest here, when am I ever really alone? Rachel and Kurt stormed out onto the stage with Finn and Blaine trailing behind them. I didn't have to ask, I knew they overheard the conversation.

I picked up my bag and sighed. They were like my older siblings, always hounding on me and teasing me about these kinds of things. "Christine," Rachel said. "Do you know what you just agreed to?" She was in her regular clothes, as was Blaine. It still didn't register in my head what I had just agreed too. Like I said earlier, I wasn't sure how to respond while he was asking the question. I panicked and said yes.

"Of course," I told her. "Ice skating." My voice slowed down on the word "ice" and dragged out the final piece, "skating." Crap.

"You can't ice skate, Christine," Kurt said. "Last year you broke your arm; the year before you broke your other arm. And the year before that you dislocated some part of your body!"

"My pinkies," I reminded him. Blaine winced, I didn't blame him. I sucked at everything sports related. I bit my lip, noticing the problem at hand. I was blinded by my too obvious crush on Rory to even think straight. "I'm still going," I said.

"We figured," Kurt said. "Which is why you won't be alone."

I groaned and stomped my foot. "I'm a big girl guys, I think I can handle a little bit of ice skating alone." All I wanted was some alone time with Rory without my friends getting in the way of it. Was that too much to ask for? Getting alone time with him was becoming damn near impossible. They were my friends though, I knew that no matter how much I pleaded them to not go, they were going to be there.

"Relax," Rachel said. "You won't even notice us."

It made me wonder just how many of my friends were going to show up magically just to keep an eye on me. I wasn't going to ask that aloud because it would be an open invitation for the entire glee club. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. I give up. My friends win. "I better not notice you," I grumbled.

"Try not to break or dislocate anything," Kurt said. "That would be the worst first date ever."

Cue more exploding butterflies. I prevented the stupid smile from making its way onto my face again. First date. With Rory. Date. Rory. Those were the only words my brain could process at the time. Kurt smirked, Finn smirked, Blaine smirked and yes, even Rachel smirked. They knew. I hated that I could be read like an open book to my closest friends. I rolled my eyes at them and started making my way towards the exit.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say she's in _love_," Rachel teased from the stage. I stuck my tongue out at her as I lingered by the side exit.

"I don't think she's in love," Finn said, "but she sure is _acting_ like it."

I smiled and pushed open the door. I might not be in love… yet… or ever for that matter, but I can never help the way I feel about someone. I said it before and I'll say it again; Rory likes me for me, unlike my past two boyfriends. I could be myself and more, I didn't have to please Rory with a fake personality. What more could a girl ask for in a guy? I hoped he would understand my ice skating issue, and I hoped that it wasn't a dead giveaway that I was in _like_ with him. Then again, he might have gotten the hint when I said yes a little too quickly.


	11. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER XI**

* * *

><p>By the time it was Thursday I arrived to school extra early and familiarized myself with the room I sorely missed. I took a deep breath and smiled as the printer started printing the many issues of today's paper. I picked up the warm batches in my hands and grinned. I missed this. As the printer did its thing I would go back and forth pulling out complete copies and placing them in their piles, before tying them up and sticking the note with the homeroom it would be delivered to.<p>

Tina walked into the room at seven-fifteen as I was worked through yet another pile. With the way I moved about my business, all the copies were almost done. "Happy to be back?" she asked.

"Couldn't be happier," I said. Tina began helping me add the homerooms on the sticky notes as the printer continued printing. "Remind me to tell Figgins that we need to switch to recycled paper." Tina and I giggled and quietly continued.

"I heard from a little birdy that someone was going on a date with a certain Irish exchange student," Tina said in a sing-song voice. My cheeks warmed up and I shook my head lightly. Kurt probably opened his mouth the first chance he got.

I wasn't going to deny it, "Yeah," I said. "But what if he doesn't think it's a date? I mean, we're only friends…"

Tina shrugged her shoulders and went about her business. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. Thinking about it made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. It made me wonder how Rory felt about hanging out with me. I didn't dwell on the thought for long because it was already seven-thirty and I had to drop the bundles off in the teachers' mailboxes.

I stared at the back of Rory's head. He transferred into the same calculus class that Kurt and I were in. Kurt rolled his eyes when Rory walked into the room. I thought the kid was lost or something, but no… he transferred. It made me giddy inside. Sadly, the class had assigned seats. Or, more like on the first day we chose our seats and the teacher said we were stuck there until the end of the year. Like I was saying, I was staring at the back of Rory's head, chewing on the eraser of my pencil. Typical school girl crush.

Kurt cleared his throat as he tried to grab my attention. "You're supposed to be helping me with this stuff," he said. I tilted my head and stared at him.

"You serious?" I asked. "You should be helping me with this stuff. Because of you I'm managing a B average in this class."

Kurt smirked and returned to scribbling down his answers to the problems. I sighed and tore my gaze away from the back of Rory's head, looking down at the gibberish of problems on my worksheet. Chain Rule and Derivatives. My eye twitched at all the parenthesis on the page, as well as the different variables, roots, fractions and the sine and cosine stuff. Blah!

The bell rang. I jumped out of my seat and threw everything into my bag. Kurt shook his head and smiled at me. "You have it bad," he said.

"And I wouldn't if I obeyed my first rule," I reminded him.

"Yeah," we walked out the door together. "But if you did, you'd slowly die inside."

That couldn't have been truer. I waved as the two of us parted ways. I turned down a side hall, heading towards the library to do some studying. This was the free time I shared with Rory. I paused at the end of the hall when I saw Rory talking to Sugar by his locker. My blood boiled. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed, _You're overreacting_. I needed to stop thinking of Rory as my territory. We were only friends and nothing more.

That still doesn't stop me from not liking the way Sugar was touching his arm. Oh god, now they're laughing. I took a deep breath and walked down the hall, pretending that their side conversation wasn't anything I was interested in. Rory spotted me of course. I turned and looked at Sugar who stalked off in the opposite direction.

"Heading to the library?" he asked. I nodded.

"I'll join you," he smiled. For the moment I forgot about him and Sugar talking. When we arrived at the library, I began questioning what kind of relationship the two could possibly have. We found an open table and sat across from each other. "I'm really excited about Saturday," Rory said. "We'll finally be able to spend time together without the interruption."

I blushed as I set my binder down on the table. If only, I thought to myself. "It'll be fun," I told him. Sure it will be fun. I still neglected to mention that I failed at ice skating. I pulled out my pencil and began doing my work. We spent the remainder of the period in a calming silence.

* * *

><p>Saturday rolled around and I was throwing my entire closet onto my bed. Rose stopped by the door and stared at me with questioning eyes. "It's just ice skating," she said.<p>

I turned my head and put my hands on my hips. "I know," I nodded.

"Do you?"

I groaned and stared at the pile of clothes on my bed. It was cold outside, but not freezing. I walked over and picked out a black tank top and my lavender sweater my dad had bought me after much pleading. I smiled as I held it in my hands. I reached for my pair of dark jeans and my classic converse. After I changed I wandered the house, leaving the pile of clothes on my bed to deal with later.

Rory said they would be stopping by at noon. I glanced at the clock sitting on the coffee table in the living room. It would be noon in about fifteen minutes. I was excited, and I was nervous. I knew I was going to make a fool of myself before I could even set foot on the ice. "Do you have a plan?" Rose asked. She leaned against the doorway and smirked at me.

I rolled my eyes. "Of course not," I said. "I'm just going to make a fool of myself and let him discover the truth that way."

Rose giggled and shook her head. A car honked its horn outside. "Have fun and try not to break anything," she warned me.

I smiled. "Will do, Rose." I jumped up from my seat on the couch and ran out the door. Rory, being the gentleman he is, stepped out of the car and opened the back door for me. I smiled and slid in. "Hey guys," I greeted Santana and Brittany.

"I thought you couldn't ice skate," Santana said bluntly.

I scoffed, "Who told you that? I love ice skating…"

Santana rolled her eyes and drove on the main road. It took us at least twenty minutes to get to the outdoor ice rink. The two girls bounced out of the car as Rory and I followed close behind. My stomach was churning. There were so many people. I was going to look like an idiot in front of them all. I took a deep breath as we approached the rent-a-skate booth. We paid, we said our shoe sizes, and we found a seat to put them on.

I scanned the crowd for any familiar site of my very watchful friends. I sighed and continued lacing up the pearly white skates. Santana and Brittany took off onto the ice, pinkies linked as they followed the crowd around the large oval rink. Crap. This was it.

Rory stood by my side, waiting for me to stand up. Yes, stand up on sharp and very thin skates. "Bear with me," I said. "It's been a while since I last did this."

A stupid grin formed on my lips as he outstretched his hand for me to hold. I used it as support to get up on my feet and balance myself. I wobbled and almost fell. Rory held onto my arm to keep me from crashing to the ground. My cheeks began warming up as we made our way towards the ice. Now this is where things get interesting. Rory let me go once our skates came in contact with the smooth and slippery surface.

I took hold of the outer rim of the rink and stood with my back facing him; legs slowly sliding farther apart. "Rory," I said. He skated over to me with that smile. "There's something I should probably tell you…" I let out a nervous laugh. "I can't ice skate." I started shaking my head. "It's not a strong point of mine."

Rory laughed, "I know."

My face contorted immediately. My eyebrows furrowed together and I stared at him. "Wait, what? How?"

"That day when I invited you, I forgot my bag backstage. I overheard you and your friends," he said slowly. His face was red, I was sure my face was red. This was embarrassing.

I scratched the back of my head as we stuck close to the rails. "This is awkward," I said at last. We weren't even halfway around the oval when I stopped. "I take it you heard everything?"

Rory slowly nodded. He skated beside me with his hands behind his back. "And I take it you figured out that I have a very big crush on you?"

"I've already known that," he said, grinning.

My mouth opened slightly as Rory giggled and skated away from me. I turned and leaned my back against the railing, shouting at him, "Was I seriously being that obvious?"


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER XII**

* * *

><p>I groaned as I continued pulling myself along the railings. This was humiliating. Not the ice skating part, but the part about Rory knowing for a while that I've had a crush on him. Rory skated around the oval a few times; I've seen him pass me at least twice while I was still trying to finish my first round. Somehow in this mess, I managed to have wrong footing, causing me to fall on my butt on the ice.<p>

A figure hovered above me. I swear I thought it was Rory, but when I heard Rachel's familiar voice, I knew it wasn't. "What do you want?" I asked her. "Leave me here to die."

Rachel grabbed my flailing arms and helped me back up. I held onto the railings again and stared at her. "I was wondering when you'd get here," I said. "Where are Kurt and Finn? They can't be far behind."

Rachel rolled her eyes at me. "Finn's renting skates for himself and Kurt is here with Blaine. They're just sitting on the benches." She pointed in the direction of where the rink opened up. Kurt and Blaine spotted us and waved, Rachel and I waved back. "Where's Rory? What'd I miss? Is he mad that you have no idea how to ice skate?"

"Slow down," I told her. I began pulling myself along the edge, Rachel skated slowly beside me. "You missed a few interesting things." I wasn't sure how to tell her. Thinking about it made my stomach explode with butterflies; though I wasn't sure if this was good or bad. I took a deep breath and stopped moving. "Rory apparently knew that I had a crush on him this whole time." Rachel gasped. I shook my head, "And that's not even the embarrassing part! He overheard the conversation we had in the auditorium." Rachel gasped again.

"I know!" I exclaimed. "So now we're just in an awkward moment."

"I feel guilty," Rachel said. At last I reached the beginning/end of the rink. I wobbled my way towards Kurt and Blaine and plopped down on the bench beside them. Rachel went off on the two boys, telling them everything I told her just minutes ago. I scanned the rink for any signs of a skating Rory. I felt bad, I wanted to confront him about it, but with my friends here… well do you really think that was going to happen?

Kurt gave me a sympathetic look. "Go find him and talk to him," he said. "This might be a good thing for you." I turned my head and stared at Kurt. He smiled at me which caused me to break out into a small smile of my own.

"Okay," I said. "But first these skates gotta go."

Kurt shook his head before I could undo the laces. "Oh no. Go find him now!"

I stared at him, slightly afraid, but I obliged. I tried to keep my balance as I entered the demon ice rink in search of Rory. I pulled myself along the edge, regretting the fact that I never accepted those ice skating lessons from so long ago. I stopped at the far end of the rink and scanned the skating couples, friends and families. They all looked so happy, and even though some of them didn't know how to skate like myself, they were still having a good time.

"Rory!" I called out when I spotted the exchange student. Rory slowed down on the ice and skated back over to me. I was glad to say that he didn't seem disappointed. I smiled at him.

"This still your first round?" he teased. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "What's up?" he asked.

"I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for lying to you," I said. "And I also wanted to clear the air about the whole crush thing… I'm really bad at it. It's always obvious to everyone."

He smiled and nodded; redness creeping up into his cheeks. "Apology accepted," he said. He mentioned nothing about the crush. It made me feel a little nervous. What if my other thoughts were right and he only liked me as a friend? I bit my lip, maybe he just didn't want to talk about that right now? Rory outstretched his hand towards me. I looked up at him, confused. "C'mon," he said. "I'm going to teach you how to ice skate."

I laughed as the butterflies exploded in my stomach. "Alright," I told him. "Let's do this." I took his hand and grasped it firmly in my own, holding on for dear life as we moved away from the edges of the rink. I bit down on my lip as I tried to keep my legs as equal distance, but not too spread apart.

"You're supposed to move your legs too you know," Rory pointed out. I managed to keep myself balanced well enough while he continued pulling me along. "And not use me as a source," he laughed.

I glared playfully at him. Our arms were linked into each other; it was easier than hand-holding. I thanked myself for not blushing madly just because the two of us were touching. Rory tried slipping his arm out from mine; he was trying to be sneaky about it. "Oh, no you don't," I said. "I think you just want to see me fall!"

Rory shrugged and grinned, "It was worth a shot."

I nudged him, causing his steering to move a little more to the side. "You need to try, falling down is all a part of the experience," he said. I looked down at his feet, they moved back and forth in a fluid motion, sticking to a tune; one, two, one, two. His knees were a little bent. I kept my focused on how he was moving, trying to get my legs to do the same thing.

I scared myself a few times as I did move my legs, but I found my own rhythm and stuck to it. After ten minutes I was staking with Rory by my side. "Now let's see if you can do it without holding onto anything… or anyone." This caused us both to blush only slightly. "Are you ready?" he asked. We kept pace around the circle, our legs still moving to their own beats. I felt his arm slip out from mine.

I wasn't sure what happened then, but I think I panicked. I gasped when there was no more support for me to hold. Rory wasn't that far from me, so I grabbed him by his jacket just as I could feel myself falling. The two of us fell hard on the ice. I winced from the cold ice, and from the weight pushing down on me. I opened my eyes and saw Rory's face looming over mine. "Uhh…"

We scrambled and lost balance as we tried to untangle ourselves. Rory helped me up once he was balanced. "I don't think you're ready for free skating just yet," he said, blushing.

I tucked some hair behind my ear and nodded. I hoped my friends didn't see that, but what's the point in thinking it? I knew they did. They must be squealing with joy right about now. I shook my head at the thought and re-linked my arm through Rory's. We spent the remainder of the afternoon skating together instead of alone. Trust me when I say that whenever Rory suggested I give free-skating another shot, I would just fall down. Things were a little less awkward between us, which was all I could ask for. I did spot Rachel and Kurt a few times. Those two gave me knowing winks and smirks, enough to tell me that they knew about my fall with Rory.

At the end of the lovely not-date Santana dropped me off first. I turned to Rory, "I had fun. Thanks for inviting me, and thanks for teaching me how to ice skate."

"You're welcome," he said. I smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek. It was one of those "spur of the moment" types of things. I hopped out of the car without looking back and skipped into the house.

I could smell something yummy coming from the kitchen. Rose was baking. It was never like her to bake things; she always said she never had the patience for it. She preferred when other people baked for her; as did I. I released a dreamy sigh and rested my elbows on the table, cradling my chin in my hands.

Rose turned and gave me an amused look; the corners of her lips tugged to one side, her eyebrows were raised and her eyes slightly widened. "What was that?" she asked, suppressing a laugh.

"What was what?"

Rose took off her oven mitts and stared at me, "I take it you had a good time?"

"It was nice," I said. "He taught me how to ice skate!"

"And you didn't break anything!" Rose grinned at me. "Anything else happen?"

"He knew that I had a crush on him, and I kissed him on the cheek just a minute ago."

"Whoa," Rose said.

"I know," I said.

"Well, you did make it pretty obvious," she uncapped the frosting and handed the jar over to me. "Wanna help decorate?"

I took the jar and studied her. "You don't bake," I told her.

"I thought it was a good time for some change." We smiled.


	13. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER XIII**

* * *

><p>December rolled around, and let me tell you that I was even more confused about my feelings than ever. I mean, I wasn't even sure if Rory and I were dating… I assumed us hanging out all the time counted as "dates." Maybe he still thinks we're friends? But how can that be when he told me just last week that he liked me. I sighed. Does all this relationship stuff have to be so confusing? It was the last week of December before we left on break, Christmas and holiday cheers were in the air, and everyone was excited.<p>

I was excited too, but sad. This would be the first Christmas without my dad. I set down my pencil, glaring at my calculus test. I answered all of the questions to the best of my abilities. This was probably the worst thing about leaving before break; exams. I sighed and looked over my work, hoping that what I did was all right. Kurt and I crammed for three days for this test. We both hoped that I didn't fail.

I along with two other students stood up and handed in our exams. I picked up my bag and my pencil and walked out of the classroom. Kurt had finished ten minutes before I did, I found him sitting in the library looking over notes before his English exam. I sat across from him and glanced at the clock. This was such a slow day. I couldn't wait until it was time for glee club, I needed a good distraction. Not to mention, I had a song planned. Hopefully Rory would get the message, but the song was more for me coming to terms with my feelings and putting my first rule aside.

The universe just loves working against me, I thought. I glanced at the clock again, ten minutes before our final period of the day. I had no more exams until later in the week, meaning I could chill in history with Rachel. We were watching a movie and taking notes, but for students watching a movie meant texting or sleeping. I pulled out my notebook and began doodling on a filled page. I hummed the tune of the song I would be singing during glee club. Sadly it wasn't holiday themed, but I was sure everyone would be pretty excited with what I had to say through the song.

Kurt groaned, "I am going to fail this physics exam." He clutched his pencil tightly and slammed it down on the table. I looked around, but no one seemed to notice. "I don't want to be a physicist in the future!"

The librarian peeked around one of the shelves and shushed him. I sighed, "Then do what I did," I said.

"What was that?"

"Fail."

"But you love science," he said. "I hate it. And you didn't fail!"

I shrugged my shoulders. "You're allowed a single sided sheet of notes you know," I told him.

Kurt nodded and pulled out a piece of paper with tiny handwriting in three different colors. I squinted. It was so small. "Eesh. You really are freaking out about this. It's not that bad, just write down the basics like the equations and minor things you don't understand. The test wasn't that bad."

"Says the girl who hates the class as much as I do," he muttered. For the next ten minutes I helped Kurt rewrite a sheet of notes and clarified a few things he was confused on. It made a little more sense to him, but not completely. When the bell rang we walked out of the library. "Wish me luck," he said as we parted ways. I waved him off and walked towards the history wing.

When I took my usual seat I was suddenly bombarded by Rachel and her pestering questions. I rolled my eyes at her, she took no notice. "Are you dating him or not?" she asked. "You didn't even return my texts."

"I realize that," I said. "But I was busy exploding my brains over calculus." Our teacher walked into the room, wheeling in the television and plugging it in. Teachers here were terrible with simple technology. We always waste ten minutes of precious doing-nothing-movie-time because of them. "As for dating Rory, I have no freakin' clue! He told me he liked me last week… we hang out a lot but I don't think any of those times were dates…"

"You don't think he's gay… do you?" Rachel asked suddenly.

I turned my head and stared at her, "No! He's not!" I paused and reminisced on pieces of the past. "He did start acting a little weird after I kissed him on the cheek."

"YOU KISSED HIM?" Rachel grinned and grabbed my arm tightly.

"Ouch! And keep it down!" I yanked my arm free of her grasp and glared at her. "I kissed him on the cheek after I thanked him for teaching me how to ice skate…"

Rachel placed a hand over her heart, "Christine you're killing me here. If neither of you make the first move I will intervene and do it for the both of you."

I groaned, "That's why I had a song planned for glee club. I hope he'll get the message I'm trying to send him."

Her scary grin was back. Our teacher turned off the lights and resumed the movie from where we left off. I had my notes sheet on my desk, but I didn't bother filling it out. I managed to get in a comfortable position as I rested my head down on the desk. I had to keep telling myself that even if there was nothing going on between us and we were only good friends, that was okay. What if he was just nervous about confronting me? He did run off after our "coffee-date" confessions. It was pretty awkward.

At the end of the school day I found myself storing books and binders away into my locker when Rory came up to me. "Hi," I greeted him.

"Hey, so I kind of wanted to apologize for running off, acting strange, and avoiding you for the past few days," he looked down at the floor.

I smiled and said, "Oh really, I didn't even notice. Guess I've been busy with all these exams and stuff."

Rory took a deep breath and looked back up at me just as I shut my locker. "I really do like you Christine," he said. I tried to keep the stupid grin from forming on my face. "I'm just not good at expressing it…"

"We both share that in common," I told him. I patted him on the shoulder and then quickly pulled my hand away. "See you in glee club." I watched as he walked down the hall. I bit my lip and leaned against the locker. This felt like High School Musical. I could hear the tune of the song I wanted to sing playing in my head. I really wouldn't say that I was in love with him, but I really, really liked him.

"_So she said what's the problem baby, what's the problem I don't know well maybe I'm in love. I think about it every time I think about it, can't stop thinking 'bout it!"_

I was standing in the choir room. Now it did feel like a scene in a teen musical.

"_How much longer will it take to cure this, just to cure it 'cause I can't ignore it if it's love. Makes me wanna turn around and face me but I don't know nothing 'bout love! Come on, come on turn a little faster, come on, come on the world will follow after, come on, come on 'cause everybody's after love!"_

My cheeks were heating up and my face was hurting from the real smile I produced. My friends clapped along to the tune of the song and swayed in their seats. For some weird reason this song always made me happy. It was true for the most part. I knew nothing about love, but I was feeling something weird. I continued.

"_So I said I'm a snowball running, running down into the spring that's coming all this love, melting under blue skies, belting out sunlight, shimmering love! Well baby I surrender to the strawberry ice cream never ever end of all this love, well I didn't mean to do it, but there's no escaping your love oh!"_

"_These lings of lightning mean we're never alone, never alone, no, no!"_

Rachel was the first up and out of her seat, followed by the rest of the girls who joined me down on the main floor. We jumped, spun around and improvised more dance moves to the remainder of the song.

"_Come on, come on move a little closer, come on, come on I want to hear you whisper, come on, come on settle down inside my love! Come on; come on jump a little higher! Come on, come on if you feel a little lighter, come on, come on we were once upon a time in love! We're accidentally in love. Accidentally in love. Accidentally in love…"_

The girls picked up on the rest while I pushed my hair back from my reddened face and hurting smile. "_I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love!"_

"_Come on, come on spin a little tighter, come on, come on and the world's a little brighter! Come on, come on just get yourself inside her! Love!"_ I sighed. "I'm in love…"

The class erupted into cheers and I couldn't help but clap along as well. Rachel tackled me into a hug. My face was still red while I returned to my seat. I've never felt this happy before. "That was great, Christine," Mr. Schue said. "Not really holiday themed, but still great. What made you sing it?"

This grabbed everyone's attention. I felt hot again, but this had to do with the nervousness and the possible embarrassment. So, I shrugged my shoulders and spoke most of the truth. "I'm not really in love… but you guys were right to say that my rules were keeping me back. So thank you for forcing me to ignore them, otherwise I wouldn't feel the way I do now." There was a round of approval at the mention of me ignoring my rules. Mr. Schuster walked out to grab some decorations for our new tree and the choir room.

I quickly glanced at Rory who gave me a small smile. It was enough to send me over the edge again.

Rory pulled me aside just as everyone was getting into the decorating mood. I had no idea what he was going to do, but I had a feeling. Maybe he did get the message! "What's up?" I asked.

Rory swayed from side to side. Whatever he wanted to say he looked nervous about it. "I was thinking… tomorrow, maybe you wanted to go on a real coffee-date?"

I almost fainted.

I couldn't find my voice, so I nodded. Eventually I said, "I'd love that."

I turned to join the ladies decorating the Christmas tree. I caught Sugar's eye briefly. She was glaring at me, and I didn't like it one bit.


	14. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER XIV**

* * *

><p>"Your song worked," Kurt said. He sat down beside Rachel. We were wasting away the remainder of the afternoon at the coffee shop. "Rory came around and asked you out for real this time." He smirked at me. I rolled my eyes and began stirring my green tea.<p>

"This is all so exciting!" Rachel set down her cup and released an overly dramatic sigh. I smiled and shook my head at her. "I don't think I've ever been happy like this for anyone before," she said. I stopped stirring and took a sip of my calming tea. After all the previous events that happened back in the choir room, I was still on edge about the whole Sugar situation. It was obvious to see that she was jealous of Rory asking me out. This was one of the many reasons why I didn't want to be in any more relationships. I can't stand the jealousy.

"So have you guys applied to your colleges yet?" I asked, changing the subject at long last.

_Rule No. 13) Two colleges, one job._

"Kurt and I are still holding off on our NYADA applications. There are still a few more things we need to fill out before we can send," Rachel sighed and took a sip of her drink. "It's freaking me out; especially because of the whole presidential campaign situation."

I shrugged my shoulders, "Things happen. I know some people who have been suspended from school more than five times and still managed to get into college."

"What about you Christine?" Kurt asked. "Have you applied anywhere yet?"

"Two colleges, one job," I said. They looked at me with confused expressions. "It's this thing my dad and I came up with. I would apply to two Ivy League schools and also apply for a position in the New York Times travel section. So I had a choice. I would either go to one of the colleges, or I would take my opportunity at one of the most well-known newspapers in the world start my career."

"Isn't that stretching it a bit?" Kurt asked. "I mean Ivy League schools and a job application. I'm not saying I don't have faith in you, but how can you be so sure you'll get the job?"

"I'm not sure," I smiled at him. "That's the beauty of it. If I ever did get approval which I know is wishing for too much, then I would take that chance without hesitation."

"Looks like we'll all be in New York together," Rachel smiled. "What Ivy Leagues did you apply to?"

"Harvard and Brown," I said. Kurt and Rachel choked on their drinks. Kurt cleared his throat and Rachel pushed her drink to the side. I know, they think I'm insane for choosing those schools. Most seniors applied to ten, but I felt confident. "You never know," I told them. "Besides, it's good to take chances."

"But what happens if they all reject you?" Kurt asked. Rachel caught my eye and quickly intervened.

"I don't see why they shouldn't accept you," Rachel said. "You write like a professional already, and you've never been anywhere other than Canada and New York. So experiencing things for the first time would be a plus for those head editors."

I blushed, "My writing isn't that great. There's always room for improvement."

"Alright," Kurt said. "Let's stop talking about Christine's future and talk about her first date with Rory. What are you going to wear?"

The following day, Thursday, I stood in front of my closet. I needed to dress nicely today seeing as how my date with Rory was happening directly after school. My heart jumped in my chest just thinking about it. I couldn't believe I was finally going on a date with Rory. I waited one long month for him to pluck up the courage and say something. I sighed as I picked out one of my day dresses. It screamed "Rachel Berry," but it was something I wouldn't mind wearing. The top piece was white connected with a brown belt that led into the floral print skirt.

I did my usual thing after skipping into the building that morning. Newspapers were finished by the time the first bell rang. I waltzed into physics with a smile on my face. "You're looking chipper this morning," Mercedes said as I took a seat beside her. "I heard about your date with Rory, you must be excited."

"I'm freaking out," the smile fell off my face as I turned to look at her. Mercedes sat up in her seat and looked at me as if I were crazy. "Rory and I have gone out before and I thought they were dates, but somehow I knew they weren't. This is real!"

"Um, okay," Mercedes said. "You should calm down and freak out when the day's over…"

"I can do that," I took a deep breath. Our teacher walked in and began writing scientific stuff on the board. Really? Vacation was just around the corner and he was going to teach us new things? I groaned and pulled out my notebook. "So how are things between you and Sam? I know something's going on there."

Mercedes shrugged it off, "It's nothing. We're just friends. Besides, he knows that I have a boyfriend already." Mercedes looked hurt when she said it, but I wasn't going to pester her with more questions unlike a certain someone I know. Mercedes and Sam, where do I even begin; I knew there was something going on with them, especially when school ended last year. I also may or may not have seen the two holding hands at the park…

Class, class, French exam, more class and lunch. "Why do they insist on teaching us new things right before the break?" Artie was saying as I approached the table. I took a seat across from Rory and smiled at him. When he smiled back I was greeted to an eruption of butterflies in my stomach. I was looking forward to our date that afternoon, I wanted to tell him but not with everyone lingering around.

Finn set his tray down beside me; Rachel sat on his other side. "Finn! I wanted to sit next to Christine," she complained. I rolled my eyes as I took a sip from my water bottle. I munched on my sliced veggies, listening to the tiny conversations around me and helping Finn prepare for his science exam next period. I glanced down the table when I thought I heard someone call my name. Instead I locked eyes with Sugar. I couldn't look away. She narrowed her eyes at me and turned her head to the right in a diva-ish manner.

I came to the official conclusion; Sugar liked Rory as well. She was jealous of me. I wanted to talk to her about it, but that protective feminine side of me said not to. It told me to get jealous as well; if she wanted him she was going to have to find a way to take him from me. I shuddered; I can't believe I just thought that! It's not like me at all. I peeked at Rory as I took another sip of my water. The last thing I wanted was for jealousy to get in the way, but you can't always get what you want. Especially in relationships.

After lunch, Rachel and I walked into our history class. The teacher turned on the film and the two of us began whispering in the back row. "I think Sugar's out to get me," I said. "It's kind of putting me on edge."

"It's a natural thing. I feel it all the time whenever some other girl talks to Finn," Rachel replied nonchalantly.

"I hate being jealous though," I said. "And I hate it when other people are jealous _of_ me." I sighed and slumped down in my seat.

Rachel shrugged, "There's nothing you can really do about it. Sugar's going to try and shut you down so she can have Rory. You have two options; stay strong and don't let her get to you, or give in and let her have him." For once she made sense. She was right, I had two options. I tried searching for a third but I couldn't think of one. Sugar wasn't going to listen to me, so there was no point in trying to talk to her about the situation. I would just have to ignore her, but I wouldn't play dirty.

As the day came to a close I was becoming much more nervous about my date with Rory. I knew it was nothing to freak out about, I suppose I was just excited that this one was going to count as our first. I tried not to let my mind ponder on the possibilities of the future. I still wasn't sure how long Rory would be staying here. What if I—dare I think it—fell in love with him?

I would either be attending my new job or going to college, he would only be a senior. I looked up as someone sat beside me in the choir room. I was early, seeing as how I had a free period earlier where I was just writing and reflecting on my years at McKinley. It wasn't something I had to worry about now, but I had so much to say. In the past when the newspaper used to be a huge hit, senior journalists would submit reflection pieces about their years at McKinley; might as well bring back tradition.

I smiled at Blaine, "Penny for your thoughts?" he said.

"Just random thinking," I told him. "Trying to take my mind off of the real date I'll be having with the boy I am so obviously crushing on."

The two of us cracked a few jokes and laughed. "The song was a nice touch by the way," he added.

"I may or may not have been watching the second Shrek movie to be inspired by it," I told him. Our friends slowly trickled into the room. We all greeted each other and started talking about the end of the week and possible holiday break plans. "We should go ice skating again," I said just as Rory entered the room, "Now that I know how, thanks to a pretty awesome teacher." Our eyes met, I smiled as he blushed.

We didn't do as much as I thought we would have during glee club. We did discuss a little bit of both regionals and nationals, but it wasn't much. "I have a good feeling about next year," Rachel said aloud. "No more slip ups, just smooth sailing. Winning this year would mean a lot to most of us." We seniors nodded in agreement. Everything we've done in glee club has been leading up to this point. It would suck if we lost again.

I twiddled my fingers nervously as Mr. Schuester called for the end of practice (even though we did nothing). He'd see us one last time tomorrow before we all went our own ways before break. I picked up my school bag just as Rory was making his way towards me. I couldn't keep the stupid smile off of my face. I didn't want to seem too excited about this date. I sighed. "Ready to go?" he asked. There were traces of blush rising in his cheeks. He was just as nervous about this as I was.

"Yeah, let's go before anyone else decides to follow," I stared directly at Rachel when I said it. She didn't notice. Rory and I walked in silence as we left the school. It wasn't a far walk from there to the coffee shop. After ten minutes, things started getting awkward. I wanted to break the silence, but I didn't know what to say. "Uh, so this'll be your first Christmas away from home, right?"

Rory nodded as we turned the corner. The plaza was coming into view. "Yeah, I'm kind of sad about it, but I'll have fun here too." More silence. Why was this more difficult? Was it because we both knew this was a real date? We walked into the coffee shop and stood in line. It was warm and not as crowded with people like it usually was. I ordered my usual medium sized green tea while Rory ordered himself a medium minty hot chocolate. He paid for both orders and we went in search of a place to sit.

We sat across from each other at the two-seater table by the window. "This is really weird," I said at last. "We're actually on a date. I thought it'd just be the same as when we would normally hang out."

Rory shrugged, "I've been thinking the exact same thing." We took a sip of our hot drinks at the same time. I giggled as I slowly set the cup down.

"So, Rory," I said. "I've told you all about me on our past not-dates. Why don't you indulge me in what your life back home was like?"

"Nothing special, almost like this, just not with so many judgmental students," he said. "I was thrilled when I was chosen for the exchange program. I've never been so far from home." Rory looked down at his napkin; one hand was wrapped around his cup. If I didn't know any better, I'd say that he was hiding something else.

"It's always good to experience new things," I told him. "If not, then what's the point in living?" I took another sip of my tea before I asked him about his family. I was curious, was he an only child like me, or did he have baskets of siblings? I would love to have a sibling, just to have that love-hate relationship. Then again, I kind of already have that going on with Rachel. Being an only child isn't all bad, but it does get lonely sometimes.

"I have a few, two sisters and one older brother," he said. Rory smiled and turned his head to the window. "You'd love them; they're hilarious, but annoying."

"Are you insinuating something?" I teased. "I am offended."

We laughed. "That's not what I meant," he said. "My brother's attending university in London, and my two sisters are in primary school." It took me a few seconds to process the different terms. University, I had no problem with. It's just that in French college means high school, I don't know why that just popped into my head. Rory must have noticed the confused look on my face, so he said, "In Ireland we call Elementary and Middle school Primary. Then we have subtext where we go by classes. My youngest sister is in third class and the other is in fifth class."

"That is interesting," I said. "Obviously here we don't have that complex of a system; pre-school, kindergarten, and grades one through twelve." I didn't want to continue the conversation with school, so I asked him what he used to do back in Ireland. I had the basics from when I interviewed him, but I wanted to hear concrete stories.

"We live in the country, it's not too far from the city, but it's nice. Lots of open space. We live across from a farm, and if you keep going in the same direction you'll see more houses. It's all spread out."

"Sounds peaceful," I said.

"It is," he said. "Until your little siblings decide it's too quiet while you're studying for exams." The two of us laughed again, and the conversation was back on track. It felt like those past not-dates we've had. He told me more about his home life, it made me jealous. I wanted to get out of the States so bad, I had the sudden itch to just drop everything, hop on a plane and see where it takes me.

After an hour of pure talking, Rory and I began our walk home. He was the first. "I had fun," I told him. We stood on the sidewalk. "Better than I expected, especially after all the freaking out I did earlier today."

Rory's face broke out into a tiny smile, he said nothing. I didn't know if it was me, or if he was really leaning in, but before I could do or say anything he kissed my cheek. The blood rushed to my face. He waved and said, "See you tomorrow." After he disappeared into the Pierce's home, I ran.

Rachel was the first person I called when I entered my room. Rose was still away at work, I would fill her in on everything when she got home. Rachel picked up on the second ring, her voice echoing in my ear. "How was it?" No hellos, she was skipping right to the point.

"It was great," I said. My cheeks were screaming in pain from the smile I had on my face. "We talked about him mostly, but I learned a lot. My face hurts…"

"Did you kiss him again?"

I rolled my eyes, "No, but he did kiss me on the cheek."

Rachel squealed. I pulled the phone away from my ear. After she calmed down to the best of her abilities I placed the phone back up to my ear to listen. "This is great. Pretty soon you'll be a couple. Are you going to invite him to your Christmas party?"

"Wait, what? What Christmas party?" I asked.

"The one that you're having on Christmas Eve," she said innocently. I groaned. She's making me plan a party? "I may have told some people already…"

"You're really lucky I'm in a good mood," I told her. "We'll discuss this later." Typical Rachel, dragging me into things I didn't want to be dragged into. I tossed my phone onto the pillow and fell back onto my bed, sighing.


	15. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER XV**

* * *

><p>After an interesting dinner conversation with Rose about my date, I retreated back upstairs to my room and gave Rachel a call. We talked about this Christmas party she would be hosting at my house, I was glad when she said the only people who will be showing up were our fellow glee members. "I'll have to check in with Rose, but I don't see why she should say no." I lay back on the bed, continuing the conversation with one more bit of crucial information. "There just can't be any booze. Like, at all. We don't want another repeat of the last time. Rose would kill me."<p>

"That's what chaperones are for," Rachel said. "My dads offered, and I'm sure Rose would watch over as well."

"I know," I sighed. "Why are we having this at my house?"

"I don't know," she said. "If everyone knew you were hosting it, then they wouldn't make a big deal out of the situation. I'm in charge of decorating though." That didn't sound too good, but I didn't say anything. "Talk to you tomorrow," she said. After the two of us hung up, I turned in early for the night.

For the first time in a long time I woke up with a smile on my face. My dreams were different renditions of yesterday's date. Just thinking about it caused my cheeks to sting. I rolled out of bed and strutted into the bathroom, playing out my daily routine. After a quick shower I threw my hair up into a bun and pulled out the first couple of things I saw; my white tank-top, green cardigan, black skinny jeans and my brown boots. I grabbed my bag and walked downstairs where Rose was getting ready to leave.

"See you tonight," she said.

"Before you go," I said, remembering. "Rachel wants to host a Christmas party here on Christmas Eve, is that alright?"

"I'll think about it," Rose was in a rush, she was halfway out the door as I shouted after her. I poured myself some cereal and went over my notes for the English exam. At seven, I walked out the door and headed for the school. The walk always took twenty minutes, like I said before I would have gotten there in five if I had a car. I didn't mind walking though; it was a nice time to think.

I arrived to school at seven-ten. Students were making their way and busses started pulling up to the front. I followed the crowd through the double doors and made my way towards my locker. As suspected, Rachel was standing there waiting for me. "So what did Rose say?" she asked.

"Hey Rachel, good morning, nice to see you too," I said. Rachel rolled her eyes, shaking her head lightly. "I talked to her this morning about it. She said she'd get back to me tonight. She was in a rush."

"I just know she'll agree," Rachel said. "She has too. It'll be fun."

I nodded and pulled out one of my binders for class. "And what happens if she doesn't agree. Everyone you told will be pissed," I warned her.

"Do you have to think so negatively?" she asked. The two of us slowly walked the halls, wasting time before first period. I really wanted to sit down in the library and go over my notes for English, but Rachel wasn't going to let that happen. We had our history exam today after lunch; it was the one thing I wasn't looking forward to. "Kurt's going to be in charge of the food and desserts, I'm doing the decorations."

"And I'll be playing hostess?" I smirked at her. Rachel would be the hostess, it was her idea, but the party was happening at my house. Rachel nodded her head with much enthusiasm.

"Now, how much mistletoe should I buy?" she asked.

"RACHEL!"

First period English exam; it was brutal. My hand was aching from all the writing I was doing. I had two final paragraphs before I even finished. I sighed and rubbed my sore hand, glancing up at the clock. Twenty-five minutes! I only had twenty-five minutes to finish two paragraphs. I picked up my pencil again and began scribbling down the words that popped into my head. I tried remaining focused on the topic. I tried not to think about Rachel and mistletoe. It was a joke right? She wasn't actually going to buy mistletoe? Was she?

She probably would. I paused for a minute, glancing around the room at the other students writing in their blue books furiously. I continued mimicking their motions as well after the teacher gave me a look. My hand screamed in pain, but I couldn't stop now, I might not have time! English exams were the worst. At least this was the last day before vacation. That's all I would be able to think about to get me through the day.

The bell rang, interrupting my train of thought. I scribbled down the last sentence, and jumped out of my seat. I grabbed my bag and closed up my blue book, following the crowd of students to the front of the room. I handed over my test and ran out of the classroom. I met up with Rory in the hall as we walked towards Calculus. He noticed me flexing my hand.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

"I just had an English exam. I don't think I can write anymore," I told him.

"Sorry to hear that," he giggled, taking my hand. My cheeks heated up. Oh gosh, he was holding my hand! I tried to prevent the crazy smile from forming on my face. Couples held hands… we weren't a couple. Why was this so confusing? No one seemed to notice though, which I was thankful for. Once Rory and I entered the classroom I quickly released his hand and took my seat. We were both giving each other mixed signals, making everything about our feelings for one another extremely confusing. Rory didn't seem confused though, but I sure as hell was.

Baby steps, I reminded myself. Things will fall into place eventually. Right now we're still playing the friends-on-dates card. We haven't even kissed yet! There was still a long way to go. I wondered what it would be like to kiss Rory. I rested my elbow on the table, staring at the back of his head. Kurt sat down beside me as class began. A few times he tried snapping me out of my trance, but I ignored him. I was too busy fantasizing about Rory and I kissing.

My heart pounded in my chest, my cheeks were uncomfortably warm. I was afraid that anyone in this room might be able to see what was going on in my mind. I awkwardly looked around the room; everyone wore blank expressions or was half-asleep. I knew it wasn't possible to read someone else's mind, but it was always something that freaked me out. I avoided the scenarios of Rory and me making out in front of a sunset for the rest of the class.

I scoffed at the piece of paper in my hands. As we filed out of the room, our calculus teacher had the audacity to actually assign us homework over the holiday break. I really wanted to rip the sheet in half, but Kurt and Rory prevented me from doing so. Staring at Rory brought back those not so innocent thoughts I was having about him during class. I quickly averted my gaze, staring at the end of the hall as we walked to our next set of classes.

"See you guys at lunch," I waved them off. I ended up walking towards the auditorium for some quiet time. And if you must know; no I wasn't going to break out into song about my feelings. I just wanted to do some thinking. Of course it was about Rory and I and this invisible relationship neither one of us is acknowledging. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. I hopped up on the stage, setting my bag down and pacing.

We only went on one date, I told myself. I crossed my arms and bit my lip, staring at the empty audience seats. I groaned. I wanted so much more than a single date with him. Nowadays, it was harder to keep him off my mind. That little gesture he gave me the other day; the kiss on the cheek. That really sent me over the edge.

"I've been looking for you," a nasally voice called from the side. I turned my head, letting my arms drop to my sides. Sugar Motta stepped out of the darkness and onto the lit stage. We stood a few feet apart.

"Why?" I asked. For a second there she was making me feel a little uncomfortable, but why should she make me feel that way? I had nothing to fear from the rich girl with Asperger's. "Does this have to do with Rory?" I asked.

Sugar gave me a short nod. She crossed her arms over her striped white and red shirt. She wore green skinny jeans and a small Santa hat was rested on her head. Someone was really into holiday spirit. "It seems we both like him… but only one of us can have him," she said. She made it sound as though this were competition; a game at seeing who could win Rory's heart.

"Sugar, I'm sorry to say this, but Rory and I… we already have something going on," I told her. "We're both confused about our feelings for each other, but I can assure you that he already likes me."

I felt terrible saying it. I didn't want Sugar as my enemy.

Sugar nodded discretely. "I see," she said slowly. "I just thought we had a chance…" Sugar twiddled with her fingers. I looked down at the stage floor.

"I'm sure there's someone else out there for you," I told her after a minute. "Just not Rory. He likes you, just not in the way you want him to." I bit my lip, looking up at the colorful girl.

She sighed, "I know. I think guys are just intimidated by me. Too bad I can't just go to daddy. Money can't buy love."

I didn't say anything. I held back all and any rude remarks itching to jump off the tip of my tongue. "I'm having a Christmas party on Christmas Eve," I told her. "You should come. It'll be just us glee kids."

Sugar smiled at me, but something about that smile said she was up to something; half-smile, half-smirk. "I'd love to. Thank you, Christine."

I nodded, watching as she walked off the stage, leaving the auditorium through the side exit. I only hoped I wouldn't regret it. The main entrance doors to the auditorium were thrown open about five minutes later. A flustered Rachel Berry stormed down the aisle towards me. I blinked as she jumped onto the stage, standing in front of me. "Can I help you?"

"Did you just invite Sugar?" Rachel asked.

"Nice to see you too Rachel," I rolled my eyes.

"Christine! Did you invite her?"

I nodded, "It was the nice thing to do."

Rachel's eyes bugged out a little. "Did I do something wrong?" I asked. "Sugar and I were just talking. She looked a little bummed so I invited her to the Christmas party."

Rachel groaned, "Christine, there was a reason why I didn't invite her! Kurt and I overheard her talking to Brittany about how she was going to steal Rory away from you. Being Brittany she wasn't going to really understand what Sugar was up to. You were lucky Kurt and I was there at the time!"

"I just told her that Rory and I already have something going on," I explained.

Rachel shook her head dramatically. "Do you really think that's going to stop Sugar Motta? She's rich! She always gets what she wants!"

"So, I suppose it's too late to take the invite back?" I smiled sheepishly at Rachel. She gave me a 'duh' look. I sighed and sat down on stage, letting my legs dangle off the side of it. "Why do I always have to be so nice to people?"

Rachel sat down beside me. Our heads leaned against one another as we stared into space. "I don't know," she sighed. "We'll just have to be careful. Especially with the mistletoe."

"You're still doing that?" I groaned. "Why?"

"It's all a part of the Christmas spirit! And besides, maybe you and Rory will finally have your first kiss together."

"Good lord, how are we even friends?" I questioned.

"You know you love me!"

We hugged just as the bell rang. It was a long day filled with worry and thinking (about Rory). What was Sugar really up to? How was she going to steal Rory from me? Maybe I should stick around him for the whole party, I thought. No, then I would seem clingy.

Drama and invisible relationships were the worst!


	16. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER XVI**

* * *

><p>During the first three days of break I sent out both of my college applications. I was currently working on my application for the NY Journal position. My hands shook as I filled out the application. I had to choose a few of my pieces of writing to send out. Downstairs the doorbell rang. It must have been Kurt and Rachel, three hours early to begin preparations. "Christine," Rachel's voice chimed as she neared my room. I set my pen down and pushed my application to the side, turning in my chair as Rachel poked her head around the corner.<p>

"You're not dressed?" she asked as I walked away from my desk. Rachel walked into my room, shaking her head.

"It's still kind of early Rachel," I told her. I followed closely behind as she walked towards my closet. She began pushing aside hangers, looking for something decent. I shook my head and giggled. "Why are you so keen on the Christmas thing? You're Jewish."

"It's still fun even if I don't believe," she smiled. "Maybe I should convert?" She seemed pretty serious, but then she laughed. She wore a vintage red dress with a green bow tied around the waist.

"Did Kurt come with you?" I asked.

"He's downstairs with Rose, they're getting the food started," Rachel said, her back still facing me. Rachel sighed and straightened up, turning around. "Where's the dress you bought?"

I pointed at the bed where the white dress was spread out. It was simple and plain, nothing exciting. Rachel walked towards it, inspecting the article of clothing with her hands on her hips. "You should at least wear something red or green with it," she said.

I walked towards my desk and picked up the red satin ribbon. "Happy?" I asked as I handed the ribbon to her. Rachel smiled. "Now let's start decorating and then I'll get ready later."

The two of us skipped out of my room with our arms linked. It was four now, the party started at seven. I greeted Kurt and Rose as Rachel and I walked past the kitchen. In the living room, three large plastic bags sat on the couch, overflowing with colorful and shiny decorations. "You really outdid yourself," I told Rachel.

"You haven't seen anything yet!" She clapped her hands together, skipping towards the bags. I walked around the Christmas tree and turned the lights on. Our family never went all out with the Christmas tree; we usually kept it simple colors. This year we stuck with the white and red ornaments with the white lights. I looked over at Rachel to see her throwing the decorations on top of the couch.

"Looking for anything in particular?" I giggled. I picked up a long piece of fake garland with holly buds embedded inside it. I draped it over my shoulders, pretending it was a scarf.

"That needs to go around the railing on the stairs," she pointed out. Rachel picked up a tiny bundle of thin leaves. The end of the bundle was tied together with a red ribbon. I spotted the tiny white buds on the plant immediately and groaned.

"How much mistletoe did you buy?" I asked as I unraveled the garland.

"Just this one," Rachel grinned. "When we're finished with all the decorating we need to find the perfect place for this."

I rolled my eyes and walked into the main entry way, leaving Rachel behind to tend to the other decorations. I walked up the stairs and began rolling the long piece of garland around the railing. After finding some tape to hold both ends up I walked back into the living room where Rachel was hanging gold garland, separating the living room from the dining room.

I didn't realize how many people were going to be here. It was Christmas Eve; all the glee kids were going to be in my house along with their parents. "When are your dads coming?" I asked Rachel. Her dads were the greatest people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting; seriously. They know how to make you (almost) pee your pants from laughter… not that I've had that experience…

She shrugged and shoved a bag of tiny nutcrackers into my hands. "Make them face outwards along the stairs, and then put the snow globes above the entryway to the living room," she said. "Oh and one other thing," Rachel turned around and picked up a giant wreath. She placed it on top of the bag I was holding and said, "I trust you know where this goes."

I nodded and walked back out to my decoration zone. Rachel and I spent a couple of hours setting up the decorations; arranging and rearranging things. By six o'clock she ushered me upstairs to get ready before everyone started to arrive. The house slowly started to smell like baked goods and other delicious foods.

I hopped into the shower, spending fifteen minutes in there. I spent another twenty minutes blow drying my hair. I got dressed, staring at myself in the mirror as I tied the red bow around my waist. I never spent this much time getting ready for something… maybe it was because my inner girl wanted to impress Rory. Thinking about him brought a smile to my face. I remembered that this would be his first Christmas without his family, so I wanted him to have a good time.

I picked up the pearl earrings my dad had gotten me as a gift for my sixteenth birthday. I wasn't one to wear much jewelry on a daily basis, but today was a special occasion. I stepped out of the bathroom and towards the larger mirror. I stared at myself. I felt uncomfortable, I realized. I sighed and straightened up. Might as well get this over with, I thought as the doorbell rang.

I walked out of my room, closing the door behind me before heading downstairs to greet the guests. The first to arrive was Finn, Carole and Burt. I rolled my eyes at Rachel and Finn's embrace and continued walking down the last bit of stairs. "Hey Finn," I said.

"Hey Christine," he said. Rachel turned and looked at me, nodding her head in approval.

"You look perfect!" she grabbed my arm and pulled me into the kitchen. Rose busied herself with Kurt and Finn's parents. Even though there weren't many people here yet, I had a pretty good feeling about tonight.

Sitting on the counter was the mistletoe Rachel still needed to find a place to put. "Everything smells great, Kurt," I said. He turned around and smiled as he removed the oven mitts from his hands.

"Thanks Christine," he said. The doorbell rang again. I heard more voices enter the living room. Someone also started up the slow-going Christmas music. Rachel and I helped Kurt moved the food from the stove to the larger counter. I grabbed some plates from the cabinets while Rachel busied herself with the utensils.

"We're going to need a lot more chairs," Kurt said.

"I'll take care of it," I said after setting the plates aside. Blaine entered the kitchen just as I walked out the side door. It was a chilly December evening. Goosebumps rose on my arms and legs as I walked towards the garage. There still wouldn't be enough chairs, but everyone would manage. The driveway was already packed with cars, and the parking along the streets was starting to fill up as well.

I grabbed two of the six chairs in the garage. I stopped and turned when I heard a noise. My heart jumped in my chest, I nearly dropped the chairs. "Rory!" I shouted. "You scared me."

"Sorry," he said. "Kurt told me you were out here."

I nodded, fixing my grip on the chairs. "Care to help a lady out?" Rory grabbed two chairs and together we walked back into the house. Rachel was no longer in the kitchen, and the mistletoe was no longer on the table. I rolled my eyes and led the way towards the living room. I placed my two chairs up against one of the walls. Rory placed the other two around the couches.

I squeezed by a few of my nicely dressed friends and their parents, Rory continued following me. We brought the last two chairs inside and found someplace for those. When I found Rachel, she had that infamous grin on her face. "Who else is here?" I asked.

"Almost everyone," she replied. "I found the perfect spot for the mistletoe." I don't think she realized that Rory was standing right behind me. "At long last you and—"

I shook my head vigorously. Rachel's gaze shifted from me to the person standing behind me. Her mouth formed an o-shape. She immediately ended the conversation. "Right, well, let's go mingle!" She pulled my hand, leading me into the over-crowded living room. The parents all migrated into the dining room while the teenagers took over the living room. Blaine and Kurt were still in the kitchen. Pretty much everyone was already here. I took a head count; Sugar was the only one missing.

"Dinner is served!" Kurt shouted from the kitchen. It was a mob scene. Everyone rushed into the kitchen, the line that formed led right into the living room. I sat down on the couch beside Rory, waiting patiently for the line to die down.

"I hope you're not feeling homesick," I told him.

"A little," he said honestly. "But I'm still having a good time."

"I'm glad," I said with a smile. We stared at each other for a few seconds. I really I just wanted to grab his face and kiss him once and for all. I blushed and looked in the other direction. I suddenly wondered where Rachel put that piece of mistletoe. It wasn't over the doorway leading through the dining room. It wasn't over the one in the dining room leading into the kitchen.

"What was all that about mistletoe, you and someone else?" Rory asked.

My face became ten times hotter. I cleared my throat and shrugged. "No idea. Rachel's crazy most of the time," I laughed uncomfortably.

"You look beautiful by the way," he said. Oh god, was he trying to melt my face off? I was probably as red as a tomato! No, I was as red as a tomato.

"I don't normally wear dresses," I told him. "Thank you."

The doorbell interrupted our conversation. I stood up and walked towards the front door. Of course, I thought after seeing Sugar and Al Motta. I stepped aside and let them come in. "Glad you could make it, Sugar," I said. After everything Rachel had explained that day in the auditorium, I was a little skeptical about Sugar's arrival. Maybe I should keep an eye on her from afar. "You're just in time for dinner," I said.

"Thank you for inviting us," Al Motta said. Sugar took off for the living room, leaving me behind with her father.

"It's no problem," I said. "Everyone from glee club was invited." I shut the door as Al Motta followed his daughter into the other room. I glanced up at the door way and nodded, "Oh, there it is." The mistletoe dangled over the entry way leading into the living room. Instead of walking through there, I walked down the hall towards the kitchen.

The line was definitely shorter, but not by much. I stood behind the main counter with Kurt and Blaine as everyone else piled up their plates. "So far so good," I told them.

"So where did Rachel put the mistletoe?" Blaine asked. "I saw her earlier running around the house with Finn."

I smiled, "Oh, you'll see it eventually." I pointed down the hall.

"Rachel put up mistletoe?" Rose asked, standing beside me. She sighed and rolled her eyes.

"That was my exact reaction when she told me!"

"Excuse me ladies," Kurt said. The oven mitts were back on his hands as he opened up the oven. He slowly pulled out a red-velvet cake and set it aside on the stove. "Blaine, hand me the cupcakes."

Ten minutes later when everyone else was settled with their food, I created my own plate and joined the others in the living room. I wasn't surprised to see Rachel leading the discussion for tomorrow's Christmas day show. Everyone else was thrilled for it while Sam, Quinn and I weren't. Sure, it sounded like fun, but the three of us thought it would be wiser to spend the night volunteering at the homeless shelter for families.

"I wrote the script already Rachel," Artie said.

"And I'm giving you wiser suggestions," she snapped.

"Guys, it's just a twenty minute show. It doesn't matter," Mercedes groaned.

"How many performances are you allowing to happen?" Finn asked. "And do Puck and I really need to dress up as characters from Star Wars?"

"You're not dressing up as characters from Star Wars; you'll just look like them seeing as how we're not allowed to use the names…" Artie explained.

Sugar wandered back into the room, pointing at the door frame. "Who put that little tree up there?" she asked. I rolled my eyes, chugging down the rest of my apple cider.

"That's not a tree," Santana said.

"It looks like a tree," Brittany muttered.

"It's mistletoe," Rachel grinned. Everyone turned their heads and stared at her. "What? I thought it would be a fun Christmas tradition."

"I thought you were Jewish," Sam said.

"I am, but all this Christmas stuff sounded like fun," Rachel replied.

"You need help," Mercedes stared at Rachel with a vacant expression causing everyone in the room to giggle.

Rachel frowned, "Fine. Think what you want. You'll all be thanking me by the end of the night!" She took off for the kitchen. We sat there in silence. Some of us glanced at the mistletoe and at each other. Maybe it wasn't a bad idea; embarrassing sure, but not a bad idea. Maybe I'll just avoid that doorway altogether. By the looks of it some of the others had the wheels in their heads turning.

The song "Santa Claus is Comin' to Town" snapped everyone back to reality. I took my empty plate back into the kitchen and left it in the sink. "That wasn't awkward at all," Finn said from behind me.

"I know," I told him. The oven beeped, but Kurt was nowhere in sight. I took it upon myself to remove the third batch of cupcakes from the oven, leaving them on the stove to cool off.

"Is it only because Rachel wants you and Rory to kiss and get together already?" he asked.

I blushed and nodded my head, "Basically. But what if it doesn't even happen tonight? Whatever, just let her have fun."

After dinner the Christmas party became a little livelier. The adults had had a lot of champagne to drink so far, they were louder than us kids. The dancing started up once Burt and Carole were the first to do it. The couches were pushed to the far ends of the room to create a large enough space for dancing. There was slow dancing and fast paced dancing. Kurt and Blaine pulled me into their tiny circle of dancing before I could make my escape. It was all fun and games while it lasted, because a few minutes after that I spotted Sugar pulling Rory along towards the living room door.

My heart dropped. I suddenly felt dizzy and nauseous. I could feel myself wanting to cry as I watched them kiss. Sugar practically threw herself at him. Rory, being a boy was thrown off. I don't blame him, he wasn't expecting it. At least he tried to push her away, right? Some other part of me was saying no. I had to force myself to look away. As I did I caught Rachel's eye.

I quickly walked out of the living room and towards the downstairs bathroom. I closed the door behind me and took a seat on the floor. It felt as though someone had ripped my heart out and stabbed it multiple times. Each stab was the urge that wanted me to break down and cry about it. This is why I had those rules. Liking someone a lot will only get you so far. With relationships comes all the unwanted, unavoidable drama.

There was a light knock on the door, I didn't need to ask who it was. I knew it was Rachel, coming back to comfort me. A few tears escaped my eyes as the thought of having friends who truly cared about my feelings came to mind. Rachel walked in and spotted me sitting on the floor. She took a seat beside me.

"Boys are stupid sometimes," she whispered. "Don't let it get you down, it was Sugar's fault not his," she continued to say.

"I know that," I told her. "It just bothers me. That's all."

Rachel sighed, "If it helps, Rory started to wonder where you took off too. He almost knocked Sugar over after he tried to push her away. I don't think he'll fall for her tricks anymore." Rachel mouth formed a kind smile. I did my best to return one. "C'mon," she said. "It's Christmas Eve, and the night is still young. You shouldn't be in here crying."

"I wasn't crying," I told her, quickly wiping away those stray tears.

Sugar and her father had left by the looks of it. I take it that after Rory's actions she couldn't bear to be under the same roof as him; for the time being. I wondered how many people noticed my absence and the kiss to make a connection. Not that they needed to make a connection. They already knew Rory and I liked each other.

"Christine!" I turned and spotted Rory. I joined him over by the Christmas tree. He seemed upset and sad. "I-I'm so sorry. I thought she just wanted to ask me a question and then before I knew it she kissed me." Rory continued rambling. I kissed him on the cheek to make him stop.

I smiled, "It's alright. I knew it wasn't your fault. I'm a little disappointed, but not furious."

Rory's face broke out into a comforting, warm smile. He engulfed me into a hug. I felt a little happier knowing that he had no feelings for Sugar, and that he knew what had happened was a complete mistake. "Would you like to dance?" he asked as a slow song came on.

"I'd love to."


	17. Chapter 17

**CHAPTER XVII**

* * *

><p>Three weeks into January and Rory and I still weren't a couple. I know what you must be thinking. <em>Hurry the hell up!<em> I'm thinking the same thing too, just with less anger. You might've guessed it by now, but Rory was just as confused about his feelings as I was. I think he's still under the impression that we're very good friends who just go on dates with each other. Is this what it's like in Ireland?

"How many more days until we're out of here?" I asked Kurt as I sat next to him in _la classe de Français_.

He sighed, "Well, it's only January. We get out at the end of May and Graduation is in June."

"Not helpful," I told him.

"Why don't you just count them yourself?" he asked. "Oh, Mr. Schuster's announcing the spring musical during glee club!"

I rolled my eyes and groaned. "I know, he mentioned it like ten times yesterday, and then last night Rachel was texting me with all the possibilities of musicals."

Kurt nodded, "She did the same with me. Except she kept saying 'Don't you think I'd make a great Wendela or Belle or Christine or Elphaba or Eponine or —"

"I get it," I said, cutting Kurt off. "As usual Rachel Berry will stand center stage for the spring musical."

Kurt studied me; obviously I wasn't in one of my good moods. Rachel was always at her worst whenever the chance to be the star came around. Everyone else was shut out. "You should audition this year," he said. I stared at him as if he grew an extra head. "Even if it's not the lead role, you should still try for something. It's a lot of fun!"

"Who's going to write the lovely review?" I asked. "That's my job! I can't audition for the musical."

"Not even if it ended up being your favorite musical?" he challenged.

I opened my mouth to speak before closing it quickly. Dang it, Kurt! Why must you trap me? "I'd do anything for a place in Phantom," I said.

Kurt nodded his head and smirked, "I know."

"I know all the words to the songs. I know all the lines to both the movie and play," I continued.

Kurt nodded again, "I know. That's why you should go for it! Even though we don't know what the actual musical is yet."

"How about this," I told him. "If the spring musical turns out to be the one I am most in love with, then I'll audition for something. If it's not, then I won't."

Kurt chewed on his bottom lip, thinking about my proposal. I knew it wasn't what he wanted, but I wasn't going to give him another option. He stuck out his hand, and when I shook it he said, "Deal."

* * *

><p>The rest of the day moved slowly. I met Rory by his locker. "Hey," I said.<p>

"Hey Christine," he said, shutting the door to his locker. Even though we weren't really a couple we did a lot of hand holding and cheek-kissing. It was enough to send me over the edge, but let's be clear, If I had to keep this up any longer I was going to get down on both of my knees and ask Rory to be my boyfriend. I know it's not exactly the way things work in this world, but it was driving me crazy!

A part of me wanted to know if he was doing this on purpose. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I had to keep the options open. "So what do you think the musical's going to be? I don't know much about them, but being in West Side Story was pretty fun," he said.

I shrugged, "It could be anything really. I don't care. I'm just in one of my moods because of Rachel."

Rory nodded his head slowly, understanding. He knew that Rachel was pretty keen on being the main star of the show. I wouldn't be surprised if she ran an entire show all by herself. Rory and I unlinked our hands as we strode into the choir room. Everyone lingered in their seats, talking to each other about the play no doubt. Rachel skipped towards me. I had to force a smile as I stared at her.

"I'm so excited, aren't you?" she asked, leading me towards our seats. "Kurt told me you were going to audition for a role; hopefully it's a secondary main female character. That would be awesome!" I restrained myself from rolling my eyes and groaning. Musicals made Rachel Berry a very self-absorbed girl. What about the rest of us?

Mr. Schuster walked into the room several minutes later. Everyone fidgeted in their seats with anticipation. "Tell us Mr. Schue! What's the musical going to be? I automatically get lead right?" those were the various questions thrown at our teacher. I crossed my arms and sunk lower into my seat. I blew a strand of hair out of my face as the questions continued firing.

"Guys!" Mr. Schue put his hands up to stop the commotion. "Calm down." He grinned and clapped his hands together. "Can I get a drum roll please?" Finn who was already seated on the drums obeyed the simple command. "This year's spring musical will be…" Everyone leaned forward in their seats; stupid grins were plastered on their faces. I must have blanked out because I didn't get a chance to hear what Mr. Schuester said. Rachel jumped out of her seat, jumping up and down, spinning in a tiny circle.

"What just happened?" I asked the closest person next to me, which happened to be Mercedes.

"Were you not listening?" she smiled at me. "Mr. Schuester just announced the musical!"

"I got that part," I told her. "What is it?"

Kurt kneeled down beside me, "Remember your promise?" he asked. "Well now you get to fulfill it!" He clapped his hands and returned to his seat. My stomach churned. The musical was Phantom of the Opera? I glanced down at my now shaking hands. Good grief.

Once the class had settled down, Rachel spoke up. "Now Mr. Schuster I believe that I am the perfect choice for being the lovely Christine Daae?"

"Here we go," Santana muttered.

"I don't think anyone else would audition for her role, it's very difficult. All the high notes and such."

"Rachel there will be auditions, it's only fair," Mr. Schue said.

"I understand… but no one in here really has the voice of an opera singer," Rachel said. She was trying to wiggle her way into this role without even auditioning! It infuriated me. She might have been my friend, but Rachel needed to know that not everything was going to come easily to her. I bit down on my lip from saying anything. There was one person in this room who did have an opera-like voice and that was me! Rachel even said so herself.

If there was any role in the world of Broadway that I could relate to the most it was Christine Daae, dammit! I couldn't believe I had the guts to do what I did next. "Rachel, your voice isn't even close to being opera-like," I said. "Which is why you won't be the only one auditioning for Christine's part."

She stared at me as if she couldn't believe what was coming out of my mouth. Believe me; I couldn't believe some of the things I was saying as well. Rachel was speechless for a moment, "Christine, are you serious? You know what these things mean to me!"

"Sorry Rachel," I said. "But nothing comes easy to people in the real world." I was risking our friendship big time. I didn't want to lose Rachel as my friend, but I also wanted to teach her a lesson.

"Ladies, take a seat," Mr. Schuster said. "Auditions will be held tomorrow after school where you will get on stage, say your name, the part you want to audition for and an appropriate song from the play to reflect the character."

"Mr. Schue," Puck rose his hand. "Could you tell us what this play's about for the few of us who don't?"

Our teacher nodded. I would have gratefully explained the story line, but I kept my mouth shut for the rest of class. I looked at Rachel who sat there, arms crossed and fuming. I didn't expect her to talk to me for a while, or at all for that matter. I tried to do my best to listen to Mr. Schuster as he talked about the characters in the play.

"For the female leads there's Christine, Meg, Carlotta, and Madame Giry. Though there are plenty more males; The Phantom, Raoul, Firmin, Andre, Reyer, Piangi, Joseph Buquet, Lefevre…" Mr. Schuster paused. "Might I suggest doing the research yourselves before rehearsals tomorrow? Every character is different. And if you don't want a major role, there are plenty of minor ones to go around."

"Maybe Christine should go for Carlotta. Since she's the one with the epic opera voice," Rachel said from her seat. She was still sitting in the same position. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh please," I said. "You'd be the perfect fit for Carlotta. You're both major divas and cry whenever you don't get what you want." A few members in the class 'ooh-ed' at my sassy remark; they could feel the tension in the air between me and Rachel. Sure they were used to her acting like a total diva, but me, never. This was a first. Rachel and I were the only two in sour moods for the remainder of the class. Mr. Schue moved past the musical and started talking about Regional's.

When I got home, Rose was sitting in the kitchen. She noticed the look on my face as I went to find something to snack on. "What's wrong with you?"

I sighed, "Nothing. Mr. Schuster announced the spring musical, and as usual Rachel tried to shimmy her way into the lead's role."

Rose nodded, "I see. But I don't think that's the only reason why you're upset."

"The musical is Phantom of the Opera, and I told Rachel that I was going to audition for the role of Christine," I closed the cabinets and turned around. "I feel like I really hurt her, I don't want to lose her as my friend, but I also want to be a part of the one thing I love."

"I'm no psychiatrist," Rose said. "But I'm sure you two will make up. In the meantime, go for it."

* * *

><p>One day later the rest of the glee club, some drama geeks and I were backstage waiting for the auditions to begin. Mr. Schuster was directing the musical instead of Artie. Artie was actually going to audition for a role this time around. After he found out that the future Raoul was in a wheelchair, he had to go for the part.<p>

Over the intercom Mr. Schuster's voice said, "Alright, we're going to start with our Phantom first. Christine's will go last." I found a crate and sat on top of it. The band members finished tuning their instruments on stage, and then the auditions began. Auditioning for the Phantom Erik was Mike Chang, Noah Puckerman and—"Finn?" I said. "You're auditioning for the musical?"

"Rachel wanted me to," Finn said, shrugging his shoulders. "She said I should explore different things. I mean, I like acting. It's cool."

"Good luck," I told him as Puck left the stage. On the other end of the stage I could see Rachel staring at Finn with her arms crossed. I take it she was still upset, and she would be until Christine was hers. I was really thinking about backing out, but I didn't. I couldn't give her the satisfaction of everything going her way. May the better voice win, I thought as Mr. Schue called out the next set of characters.

Tina auditioned for Meg, Santana and Quinn both auditioned for Madame Giry. I smiled when Mercedes took the risk at auditioning for Carlotta. "Up next the auditions for Raoul." Another long line of boys got ready for the part. There was Sam, Blaine and some drama geeks I did not know. It took two hours to get through the rest of the characters before the Christine's were called up.

Rachel stormed out onto the stage. I lingered close enough by the side curtains to watch. "My name is Rachel Berry and I will be auditioning for the role of Christine Daae."

"Fantastic Rachel and what will you be singing?" Mr. Schue asked.

"I will be singing my own rendition of 'Think of Me,'" she said. I was going to be singing the exact same song. And then I remembered that day I came back to school and sang 'Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again.' It was one of the more difficult songs, and I had sung it well. I debated whether or not to sing that one or choose something else. Think of Me was my first option.

A part of me wanted to sing that song just to get on Rachel's nerves. Why not? I thought. I shook my head, no. I wouldn't sing it just to make Rachel angry. I would sing it because it was a song that suited Christine Daae's character. I sighed and watched as Rachel sang. She was better than I was intending her to be. She must have put a lot of effort into singing the song this way. Regardless of how good it sounded, there was one basic element missing from it; the opera-sounding edge.

"Thank you Rachel," Mr. Schuster said at the end of her audition. My stomach twisted into knots as I stepped onto the stage. I was never one for crowds, but like I said before I would do almost anything for a place in The Phantom of the Opera.

I took a deep breath and told myself, _you got this_. "I'm Christine Fay and I'll also be auditioning for the role of Christine Daae. I'll be singing 'Think of Me' as well." My throat felt dry. I cleared it as the song's tune started up. Why was I so nervous? There should be no reason for me to be nervous. I shook off the feeling and sang the first few lines from memory.

At least the worst has been avoided. I thought I would blank out on the words, but I didn't. I followed through with the song all the way until the end, skipping over Raoul's minor bit in the song. Then there was the epic finale. Butterflies erupted in my stomach as I sang the notes higher and higher each time before belting out the final two as high as my voice would allow. I took a deep breath to ease my nerves. "That was lovely, thank you Christine." I walked off stage, shaking madly.

I can't believe I actually did that! It was nerve-wracking, but I felt good about it. "I'll post the final cast list on the main bulletin at the end of the week. Good luck everyone," Mr. Schue said.

In three days I would find out if all of this was really worth it. I hoped for my sake that it was.


	18. Chapter 18

**CHAPTER XVIII**

* * *

><p>Thursday rolled around and Rachel still wasn't talking to me. I never approached her and she never approached me about our current situation. The wait for the final cast was eating at everyone. For some it was pretty obvious at who got the parts. Tina was the only one who auditioned for Meg, so she must have gotten it. Still, all the hype about staring at a piece of paper drove everyone crazy.<p>

Kurt was the bridge between Rachel and me. Even he was starting to feel flustered about our little dispute. I tied up the last bundle of newspapers that morning. Tina closed up one of the issues after reading the final article. "Was it really necessary to put that the casting for the musical would be announced tomorrow?" she asked.

I shrugged. "I needed to take up more space. Figgins is killing the paper. If we don't use up every inch of available space, he's going to start cutting down on pages. I can't let that happen."

We carried the bundles towards the office. Class was in session and thankfully I didn't have one this morning. After depositing the newspapers in the respective homeroom teacher's mailboxes, Tina took off for class and I headed to the library. I hopped onto one of the computers, hoping to finish my English essay early. Instead I ended up checking my e-mail.

My heart skipped a beat as I clicked on the e-mail sent from the New York Journal. Was this their final decision? I bit on my lip as I scrolled down the page. I read over the words and released a sigh. _Dear Miss Christine Fay, we are pleased to say that we have received your application and will begin our final reviewing process. Good luck!_ Even if it wasn't an official welcome notice, I was still nervous. Getting accepted would mean the world to me. It's been my dream ever since I was introduced to pencil and paper.

I spent the remainder of the period working on my essay that was due the following morning. I groaned as I typed random words that seemed to fit well together to defend my thoughts and theories. Hey, this technique has never doubted me in the past. So I've kept it up.

When the bell rang I gathered up my things and logged out of my student account. I passed Rachel in the hallway as I walked towards Calculus. Our eyes met for a brief period of time as we past each other. I was thankful that there was no glaring or any looks of anger. It made me feel a little better, but I knew we wouldn't be on good terms again until she got what she wanted. I really hoped there wasn't going to be a repeat with the Winter Musical. I don't think I could handle a tie-breaker.

"Hello Kurt," I said, slipping into my usual seat beside him.

"You two need to make-up already," he said.

I gave him a funny look, "Nice to see you too."

"Christine, this isn't funny. I've never seen you two act like this," he said. "It's quite scary."

"Tell me about it," I told him. "She's making this a bigger deal than I am."

"It's her thing to make a big deal about it, she's Rachel Berry!"

I sighed. Our teacher began handing back our last quiz. I stared at the piece of paper as if it were going to come to life and bite me. I turned and stared at Kurt with wide eyes. "What if I failed this one? I had no idea what I was doing."

"I'm sure you did fine," he picked up my quiz and turned it over. He smiled. "I think you did know what you were doing; b-plus, good job."

My heart sank down to my stomach. Do you ever get that feeling when you are for certain you failed at something, but when you receive the result it was the total opposite of what you imagined? It's an overwhelming feeling of relief that makes you dizzy. I picked the piece of paper out of his hand and placed it inside my binder. Now instead of paying attention to getting the correct answers on the quiz, Kurt decided to keep our conversation going.

"So, what's the deal with you and Rory?" he asked. I shushed him immediately, scanning the room for the familiar sight of Rory's head. He was sitting in the front this time around. I turned to Kurt.

"I have no idea," I said. "I mean, I think we have something serious going on, but I'm not sure. Neither one of us has made a move."

"You guys haven't even kissed yet?!" he exclaimed.

"You make it sound as though it's a bad thing," I said. "We've only stuck to cheek-kissing. No lip-on-lip action."

"As adorable as it is to see you both together, you need to get a move on. The year's not going to slow down. We're in the home stretch, Christine."

"I know," I whined. "I'm just so confused."

"Do you want me to talk to him?" Kurt offered. I shook my head. Rory would figure it out eventually. Otherwise I was really going to have to get down on my knees and demand that he become my boyfriend.

"Why do teenagers need to make things so complicated?" I asked.

Kurt shrugged, "I can't say. But I can tell you that we feed off drama. It's our life-source."

Later in the afternoon I wandered around the school aimlessly looking for something to do. I found myself walking into the library for the second time that day. I spotted Rory sitting alone at one of the tables. He was shifting his gaze between a textbook and his notebook, his hand scribbled on the lined paper furiously. I smiled. I walked towards the table and sat across from him. Rory glanced up, a little surprised, but grinned when he saw it was me. "Hey Christine," he whispered.

"Hi," I said. "What are you working on so studiously?"

"History," he groaned. "I have a test next week and we have a paper due tomorrow… which I haven't started."

I giggled, "It happens to the best of us, trust me." Rory continued to write, his hand slowed down before he glanced up at me again.

"I've been meaning to speak to you," he said. "I just couldn't find the right time to say something." Rory's cheeks turned red. I tried to keep myself calm. Maybe he just wanted some advice or something, I told myself. _Stop jumping to conclusions, Christine. It won't do you good in life_. Somewhere in my mind I made a mental note to add that little rule to my large list of rules.

Rory tucked his pencil away into his notebook and closed up the textbook. He placed both things back into his bag before zipping it up. My heart was pounding. As Rory stood up I followed. We walked out of the library; I didn't say anything as we ended up walking into the choir room. Rory looked relieved to find that it was empty. He took me by the hand and sat me down on a chair in the front row.

I was lost and confused; wondering what on earth he could possibly want to tell me. My pestering conclusion continued to make its way into my head even though I told it not to. It was all staring me right in the face! Rory was nervous about asking me something, he wanted to do it alone without extra ears around… My heart fluttered in my chest. Calm yourself, Christine, I warned. Calm yourself.

"So," I said, breaking the silence. "What did you want to talk to me about?"

Rory turned to face me, blushing even more. He fiddled with his fingers nervously. "Well," he began. "Uh, after everything we've been doing… uh…" Rory swallowed, he ran a hand through his hair. A tiny smile crept its way onto my face. "We've been spending a lot of time together," he said at last. "Everyone seems to be expecting something from us."

"Yeah," I said. "They want us to be a couple already. It's crazy."

"That's what I wanted to ask you," he blurted suddenly. My eyes widened. Oh god, I was right. "It's about time," he said. "I would have asked you sooner, but I was afraid you thought we were only good friends."

I quickly stood up. "That's exactly what I thought about you."

"Really?" he asked. I nodded. Rory gave a sigh of relief. I placed a hand over my chest and smiled.

"So does this mean we're now…together?" saying it made _me_ blush. Rory's face was so red by the time he confirmed the answer to my question. I ran towards him, throwing my arms around his neck and hugging him tightly. Finally, I thought to myself. I kissed Rory on the cheek just as the bell rang. I couldn't keep the stupid smile off of my face for the rest of the day.

As glee club rolled around the secret was out. I was expecting Rachel to burst into fits of approval and praise. I was also expecting a lot of hugging, but due to our current situation, the fantasy didn't happen. She looked at me, and I wasn't sure if she smiled or not. Her head turned too quickly for me to take notice. Kurt was thrilled though, but it still wasn't the same.

Mr. Schue announced that he had made the final decisions and would post the list tomorrow morning on the main bulletin board; my insides wriggled around, twisting and folding into nervous knots. I really wanted the part, but I also wanted to be back on good terms with Rachel. I sighed and folded my hands on my lap; I would be dreading the hours until morning.

* * *

><p>Friday. Cast list reveal day. I stood before the bathroom mirror, staring myself down. "Whatever happens," I told myself. "If you get the part or not, you need to redeem your friendship with Rachel." I nodded and stepped out of the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to eat breakfast. Instead I grabbed an apple I would probably neglect until lunchtime. I took my ten minute walk towards school. As the building came into view I stopped. "Just get it over with," I said. "Whatever happens, happens."<p>

I walked up the front steps and through the doors. There was a small group clustered in front of the bulletin board at the end of the hall. Slowly I walked towards it, building the suspense even though that was the last thing I wanted to do. I squeezed through the group until I could see the whole sheet of paper. "PHANTOM OF THE OPERA" CAST LIST the title read. I read through the minor characters first.

Meg Giry — Tina Cohen-Chang

Monsieur Firmin — Finn Hudson

Monsieur Andre — Sam Evans

Joseph Buquet — Noah Puckerman

Monsieur Lefevre — Rory Flanagan

Monsieur Reyer — Kurt Hummel

Older Raoul — Artie Abrams

Following the minors came the main characters. The part I was most nervous about.

Madame Giry — Santana Lopez

Carlotta — Mercedes Jones

Raoul de Chagny — Blaine Anderson

The Phantom "Erik" — Mike Chang

Christine Daae — Christine Fay

My eyes widened. I stood glued to the spot as everyone around me jostled each other to get a better look at the script. I got the part. _I got the part! _"Congratulations, Christine," I heard Rachel say.


	19. Chapter 19

**CHAPTER XIX**

* * *

><p>February was close, only a week away. Rachel and I were on better terms with each other. Turns out our fight was killing her inside as well. Was she upset she didn't get the part, of course, but she was still proud of me and considered me to be worthy competition. Since the cast list was revealed, everyday after school the others and I would retreat to the auditorium for hours' worth of practice. I was exhausted, and to be honest I wasn't expecting my afternoons to go like this.<p>

Opening night was in mid-April. Damn near two months away and we still had a lot of work to do. A lot of the extras, Rachel included, lingered in the audience. They texted and spoke quietly amongst themselves while the main and minor characters took control of the stage. I sat down on a crate as Mr. Schuster rambled on about our stage positions. It was a little difficult to get an idea of where to stand because none of the set pieces had been finished.

Mr. Schuster gave each of the main and minor characters a piece of tape. For the time being those would be our markers until the set pieces were finished. Blaine sat on the floor by my legs, and next to him was Kurt. "So when do you think we'll actually start rehearsing?" Kurt asked. I giggled just as our director announced the scene we would be practicing; Christine following the Phantom underneath the opera house. I jumped up from the crate and over to the side of the stage, facing the only prop we had available to us; the mirror.

"Mike will start out with the 'Angel of Music Reprise' and we'll do go through all of the song 'Phantom of the Opera' leading into 'Music of the Night.' Cut there and practice Buquet's murder." Was it me, or did Mr. Schuster sound a little too excited for this? Other than West Side Story which was indeed a success, this play needed to exceed the expectations, we would need to stun the audience with our talent.

I stepped a few paces back from the mirror, pretending to glance around the invisible room as Mike began singing the Phantom's piece. "_Insolent boy! This slave of fashion, basking in your glory! Ignorant fool! This brave young suitor, sharing in my triumph!_" He was doing rather well. Of course this was just practice; there was always room from now until April for improvement.

I sang my part; "_Angle I hear you. Speak—I listen. Stay by my side, guide me. Angel my soul was weak, forgive me. Enter at last, master._"

This part of the play always made me smile for some strange reason. Christine Daae's character meets her teacher after all these years. She believes it to be her father, but it isn't. It's just a man who has fallen in love with her during all that time. Unfortunately she was just too blind until the last moment to realize it. "_Flattering child you shall know me, see why in shadow I hide. Look at your face in the mirror, I am there inside!_"

I turned my head slowly for a dramatic effect. I stared into the mirror which neglected to show me my reflection. Mike stood there. Of course it would look a lot cooler once we had the proper props and designs, like fog and dark lighting. He held out his hand as he continued to sing, I pretended to be dazed by his appearance. "_I am your Angel of Music… come to me, Angel of Music…_"

From the side of the stage, blocked by a two-person wall, Blaine spoke his lines. "Who is that voice? Who's in there?" He pretended to jiggle a handle and knock on the door. "Christine. Christine!"

"_Come to me angel of music,_" I was as close to the mirror as I could get. Once I grabbed Mike's hand a second or two after his final note, the next song began instantly. The band's tune to the 'Phantom of the Opera' blared from below the stage. I stepped through the mirror. Stage crew wheeled it off and Mike and I pretended to be underground. I used my imagination as best I could to make this scene work. Like I said it was really hard to practice something with the lack of props and designs.

"_In sleep he sang to me, in dreams he came. That voice which calls to me and speaks my name. And do I dream again for now I find, the Phantom of the Opera is there… inside my mind._" We held hands and walked in place down the never-ending hallway. From the side of the stage Mr. Schuster nodded his head and smiled, pleased with our work.

"_Sing once again with me,_" Mike sang. "_Our strange duet. My power over you grows stronger yet. And though you turn from me to glance behind, the Phantom of the Opera is there… inside your mind._"

"_Those who have seen your face, draw back in fear. I am the mask you wear—_"

"_It's me they hear. Your spirit and your voice in one combined. The Phantom of the Opera is there… inside your mind._"

The difficult part of this piece for me was the vocalizing at the end of the song. You start off at one note and pretty soon you go as high as the song requires. This was definitely something I was going to have to perfect before opening night. Mike and I were sitting on the stage now, pretending to be in the boat going across the lake to the Phantom's chambers. I sang the first high note, and then the second. My voice cracked on the third and instead of going higher, I stopped and dropped my voice back down to one of the semi-high notes.

I groaned after the song ended; hating the fact that I made a mistake with the song. I never could get my range that high. Mr. Schuster didn't stop the rehearsal to comment on my slip-up. Instead we went right into "The Music of the Night." Mike's solo. He stood up, removing himself from our pretend boat. He turned and reached for my hands, pulling me up as he sang. I unfurled my script glancing over the words to the song. "_Slowly, gently night unfurls its splendor. Grasp it; sense it, tremulous and tender. Turn your face away from the garish light of day. Turn your thoughts away from the cold unfeeling light. And listen to the music of the night._"

Mike did some improv on his movements, for he was unsure of what to do as he stood there singing. He wandered towards me. "_Softly, deftly, music shall caress you. Hear it, feel it secretly possess you. Open up your mind; let your fantasies unwind in this darkness that you know you cannot find. The darkness of the music of the night._"

"Stop!" The music died away awkwardly. Mike and I glanced at Mr. Schuster. "You guys have done great so far, and I know we've only just started rehearsing this part of the play. Mike, you need to… how do I put this?"

"Be sensual?" I suggested. Blush broke out on Mike Chang's cheeks. I silently giggled.

"Yes," Mr. Schue said. "Mostly at the piece you just sang, leading it off with taking Christine by the hand and leading her towards the mannequin."

"Sensual… meaning what?" he gulped nervously. He had every right to be nervous. His girlfriend was Tina, one of my close friends. Having him touching me during the performance was going to be awkward, but it had to be done.

"You have to touch Christine… caress her." Mike and I glanced at each other, looking away just as fast. "It's okay to be nervous about it," Mr. Schue continued. He sighed. "We'll skip the rest and jump right into the other scene." He quickly flipped through his copy of the script before coming to the one he wanted. "Alright, extras for the ballet on deck!"

The extras sitting out in the audience moved onto the stage. "We're going to execute Buquet's murder once we get the platform in." The platform was the set piece that consisted of stairs to a smaller stage above the ground. I worried that most of the audience might not understand what was going on while the scene played. Who knows, maybe it'll work out in the end?

I waved to Rachel as she joined the extras on stage. I found Rory sitting in the middle of the audience seating and joined him. "Hey," I greeted.

Rory smiled, "You were really good up there."

I rolled my eyes, shaking my head, "No I wasn't. I completely messed up on the ending to 'The Phantom of the Opera.'"

"You just need some practice. Nobody's perfect." Rory reached over, draping one of his arms over my shoulders. I leaned my head on his side-body and smiled.

"Things will be awkward for a while," I said. "I have to kiss both Blaine and Mike during the performance."

"It won't be that weird," he suggested. "I mean, you are all taken."

"Very true," I said. "Thank god, I don't think I could deal with anymore drama if I was still single."

"But you're not." I straightened up in my seat, ignoring my heated face. I watched, with Rory, Buquet's murder scene. Puck ran up the stairs. I studied the scene hard, and it did kind of make sense as to what was happening. Mike who wore that black cape, trailed behind Puck. They wrestled a little on top of the platform. Mike pretended to choke Puck's character, tying a fake noose around his neck.

"And CUT," Mr. Schuster shouted. "That should do it for today. By the time we have the dummy and someone to work the lights, this scene will work out perfectly. Alright everyone, same time tomorrow! And don't forget to show up Saturday afternoon for more rehearsals." That received a groan from everyone, me included. It was a productive day for only starting out a couple of weeks in.

Mr. Schuster continued talking to the stage crew, while we actors and extras gathered up our things to head home. I glanced at my watch. It was almost six. We were rehearsing from the moment the bell rang until now, which was roughly four hours. Rory and I held hands as we exited the auditorium. We waited off to the side for Rachel, Blaine and Kurt. "We didn't have to show up on weekends for West Side," Rachel said. "Must be because Artie isn't the director this time around."

"I expected a lot of hard work," I said truthfully. "Just not that much."

"We'll get over it," Kurt said. "C'mon I don't want to spend another second in this school until tomorrow."


	20. Chapter 20

**CHAPTER XX**

* * *

><p>February seventh. I opened one eye and then the other, followed by a groan. I rolled over underneath the covers, forcing the pillow down on my head. Sometimes the worst thing about having a birthday was having a birthday that fell during the school year. Maybe that was just me, but I hated getting unwanted attention; this was the day I liked to avoid Facebook and all those birthday wishes from people I've never spoken to in my life.<p>

February seventh, two thousand-twelve marked my eighteenth birthday. The last thing I wanted was a reminder of growing up and being so close to the real world. Now that things have been settling down, I didn't want it to end. I had four months to make this year the most memorable, not that it hasn't been already. I tried not to wonder what would happen between Rory and me once I was gone; if I even left Lima at all. I still had yet to hear back from Harvard, Brown and my dream position at the New York Journal. I cringed at the thought, slowly regretting the choice to not add some back-ups in case things didn't work out.

My alarm clock came to life with the oldies' station, telling me that I needed to get up and start the day. I literally rolled out of bed, falling onto the floor, tangled up in my bed sheets. I tossed the pile onto my bed once I was free. I began the morning routine; continuously thinking about how today would play out. Instead of dressing like a bum after my shower, I decided to dress decently; skinny jeans, white shirt, blue cardigan and flats.

As I pulled my phone off the charger, the screen lit up with notifications. Four text messages all from Rachel and one phone call from Kurt. I rolled my eyes and threw my phone into my bag. The first thing I noticed as I stepped out into the hallway was the smell of food. Rose must have been making me breakfast for my special day. Honestly, it's just the day I was born on… unless she wants to make a big deal about me being an adult now.

I entered the kitchen and smiled at Rose. "You know you didn't have to go all out with this," I told her as she handed me a plate of semi-burnt pancakes with a side of scrambled eggs and bacon.

"You only turn eighteen once," Rose beamed. She leaned against the counter, waiting for me to dig in.

"Yeah, just like you turn every other age once," I retorted. I shoved a forkful of the eggs into my mouth, grinning at Rose so she could leave me be.

"What do you want to do tonight?" she asked as she gathered up her papers for work. "Dinner someplace other than Breadstix? You can bring along Rory. I still have yet to meet him."

I blushed and groaned, "Don't be the embarrassing parent. If anything Rachel would probably invite herself along and drag Kurt with her." I sighed, "I'll get back to you during my lunch today." Rose nodded. She wandered over and kissed me on the forehead.

"See you tonight, kid, and happy birthday."

Once at school I was lucky enough to not run into any of my friends. My phone was buzzing off the hook. I groaned and turned the little sucker off. Today might have been my birthday, but I wasn't the only one with a birthday on the seventh. Noah Puckerman used to have the attention just as bad as I do now. Before his glee club days, he was hounded on by his fellow football friends and the Cheerios. He still kind of was surrounded by those types, but not in large numbers. Today, we were eighteen.

I stopped by my locker to pick up a few things; notebooks and textbooks for my morning classes. I never understood why people made such a big deal about certain ages. I didn't feel any different. I still felt seventeen. Maybe I didn't want to face the fact that I was an adult now. I didn't want to grow up so quickly.

As I closed my locker, Kurt's smiling face startled me. My heart jumped, I placed a hand over my chest and glared as I glared at Kurt. "Don't do that."

"I take it you ignored the various birthday texts and phone calls from all of your lovely friends," he said. We walked down the hall together in, though I wasn't exactly sure where we were going.

"Uh… I lost my phone," I lied. "Don't know where it is."

Kurt pursed his lips and stared me down. I quickly looked away as he shoved his hand into my messenger bag, retrieving my phone. "Oh yeah," he said, wiggling the thing in his hands. "You lost it alright." Kurt sighed as we rounded a corner. My phone had been returned to me after he went through all the messages; reading them aloud to me. "It's your birthday, Christine. You're eighteen years old. At least be a little happy about it!"

"I just feel like people get excited over birthdays than the ones actually turning a year older," I said.

"It's supposed to be a fun day," he said. "Know what you want to do tonight? Are you going to dinner with Rose? Does Rory know today's your birthday?"

I shrugged, "Someone was bound to tell him. I am such a terrible girlfriend for not mentioning it the first time around. Then again, I've been super busy with all the play rehearsals and midterms are just around the corner." Kurt rolled his eyes and shook his head. "As for what I want to do tonight, I still don't have a single clue," I said as we entered the Language wing.

Rachel skipped towards us with that smile on her face. "Happy birthday, Christine!" I shushed her.

"Not so loud," I said.

"Oh honestly, you should be happy," she said. "You're only eighteen once!"

"You and Kurt have been spending a little too much time together," I said. "Besides, you can't even do that much when you're eighteen."

"You can vote," Kurt said.

"Buy lottery tickets," Rachel said.

"Change your name," said Kurt.

"Adopt a child," said Rachel.

"Buy a house."

"Gamble."

"Go to a strip club."

"_Work_ at a strip club."

"Sign legal documents."

"Make a real MySpace page," Rachel said. Oh, honestly who has a MySpace anymore?

"Go to jail," said Kurt. My eyes widened at their outrageous list. I came to my conclusion that my friends were crazy.

"Why the heck would I go to jail?" I asked Kurt. I turned and faced Rachel, "And why would I want to work at a strip club!" A few lingering students glanced over in my direction, giving me funny looks. I ignored the blush rising to my cheeks and groaned. "You're both insane. I hope you know that."

"And yet you still keep us around," Kurt grinned. I rolled my eyes. When the warning bell rang I followed Kurt into our French class. Quinn joined us moments later. "Happy birthday," she said. "Have either of you seen Puck?"

"Is he avoiding everyone like I would?" I asked.

"Oh honestly, it's just a birthday," Quinn said with a smile. "It's not the end of the world. So what if you get a lot of attention. It's supposed to be a fun time." I sighed and flipped through the French workbook. Quinn was right. This was supposed to be a fun day, but I just wasn't in the mood. This was the first birthday my dad wouldn't be here for. He wouldn't be here for any big turns in my future…

"Oh no," I heard Kurt whisper. "Not the sad face. Don't make the sad face, Christine." Quinn leaned over and whispered something to Kurt. For the rest of the period I was left alone in silence.

At least as the day went on, my friends were there to cheer me up with a few more birthday wishes, inside jokes and their overall presence. Rory was told by Rachel sometime during the morning. I had yet to see him today, but thankfully as fourth period ended, it was fifth, meaning glee club. Rachel dragged me down the hall, forcing me to stay put just outside the choir room. I raised an eyebrow in question of her actions. "What are you doing? We have glee club."

"I need you to wait here," she said. Finn came around the corner, pulling Puck by the arm. Puck didn't look too pleased. I had a feeling I knew what was going on here. I crossed my arms as Rachel and Finn slipped into the choir room. I groaned and turned to Puck.

"Where have you been all day?" I asked.

"In hiding," he replied. "Happy birthday, by the way."

"You too," I said. I glanced at the closed door. "I don't have a good feeling about this."

Puck shrugged, "I don't mind it, it's just annoying."

We stood there, awkwardly glancing around, waiting for someone to let us into the choir room. I never told Rose what I wanted to do tonight. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. Maybe we could go to dinner, just the two of us? Then again I wanted to make up for my dull behavior by getting everyone involved with something. I was on the bridge of coming up with an idea when the door finally opened.

Puck gestured for me to go first. I hesitated, but agreed. Slowly I stepped into the room, pushing the door open wider. "Oh my god," I paused and let my eyes soak in everything. The choir room was decorated with colorful streamers. Red cups littered the piano top. The entire group was huddled together, smiling at me and Puck. Above them was a banner with the words "HAPPY 18TH PUCK AND CHRISTINE."

"We know it's not what either of you would have wanted," Finn said. "But we just had to."

I smiled, walking towards the group and hugging Rachel. "So I know what I want to do for my birthday tonight," I said, making my announcement known. "Instead of going out for dinner with Rose, I want to take all of you out for a lovely evening of bowling." They erupted into cheers.

I remember there being a lot of hugging, singing and dancing. I finally managed to find Rory once I was left alone by everyone else. I hugged him and planted a kiss on his cheek. "I feel bad for never mentioning it," I said, taking a seat beside him. I set down my empty cup on the floor beside my chair.

"I forgive you," he replied in that adorable accent of his. "You've had a lot to deal with. I understand." Rory leaned over. I thought we were going kiss… real kiss. My heart started pounding in my chest and I didn't know how to react; but no. We didn't have our first kiss as a couple. Instead Rory ended up kissing me on the forehead. The gesture still caused me to blush furiously.

"Happy birthday, Christine," he said. I smiled.


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Chapter 21! Almost finished, guys. I should warn you though that these last nine chapters will cover a lot. There might be a lot of time skips to get through the year, but everything will be tied together in the end. I realize I neglected Christine's rules, but they will make an apperance again in the later chapters. ;) And I am proud to announce that next chapter is the chapter you have all been waiting for! I won't spoil anything. So enjoy this Valentine's themed chapter. It's very cute and fluffy! Stay tuned readers, and let me know what you think!**

Rory and I have been on three more dates since my birthday. Unfortunately we still haven't kissed yet. I had a good feeling that it was coming very soon. Today was Valentine's Day after all. In the past I normally wasn't one to go all out for this day of love; probably because my past two boyfriends and I weren't dating around this time. This year would be different, of course. I had Rory now. A smile found its way onto my face as I walked down the usual halls of McKinley. What if he didn't celebrate it? I wondered. What if he didn't even know what Valentine's Day was? I took a deep breath as I began opening my locker.

I mean, it wouldn't be terrible if he didn't know about the holiday. I wasn't exactly aware of the holidays people celebrated in Ireland. I turned the dial on my locker to the last number: 17. I unlocked it, swinging it open as I readied myself to place my books and things inside. Before I could do that, colorful little confetti hearts came pouring out of my locker and onto the floor. I looked around awkwardly. A couple of students stopped and watched as the paper came streaming out of my locker. Eventually the stream slowed down. I grinned and wiped away the excess papers that stuck to my jeans.

There was one more thing stuck on the side of my locker. It was a green piece of paper with white lettering that read "Happy." I raised an eyebrow, unsure of what that was supposed to mean. I stuck the slip of paper inside my notebook and closed my locker. I stepped out of the puddle of confetti hearts and shook excess ones off of my shoes. "What's all this?" Kurt asked. Blaine stood beside him; both boys wore similar smiles on their faces. "Confetti hearts shoved into a locker, waiting to surprise a certain someone?"

I rolled my eyes and giggled, "How do I know it wasn't you, or Rachel? You guys are the only ones that know my locker combination."

"Maybe I accidentally let it slip to a certain someone the numbers," Kurt added. The warning bell rang and students shuffled along the hall to get to their first period class. "We've got to go. I hope you know you're in for an interesting day, Christine." Kurt and Blaine waved me off. I still had the silly girlish smile on my face as I walked into English. Unfortunately I wouldn't be seeing Rory until lunch which was a few hours away. Then I wouldn't see him again until glee club which was last block. It wasn't my ideal way of spending Valentine's Day, but somehow that's what made it a little special.

I half-listened in all my classes. Rory was a constant form in my mind all through the minutes. I still wanted to know what that piece of paper meant. Happy? Should I be happy today? Well, I already was. Did the slip of paper have some kind of hidden message? I bit my lip, staring off into space as I thought unnecessarily long and hard on the word. I sighed and set my pencil down on the notebook. Would there be more of these little notes hiding for me? I wanted to tell Rory he didn't have to do all this, but I couldn't stop him now. Isn't that what every girl wanted, to feel special?

I felt more awkward than special, the same feeling I had when I won the role of Christine over Rachel; an awkward kind of special. An hour later the bell rang where I was then shipped off to my history class with Rachel herself. At least we were on speaking terms. Whenever I saw her I couldn't help but be reminded of that terrible day during auditions. I shook the thought off as I entered the classroom. I took my seat beside Rachel. She grinned at me. "Kurt told me what happened," she squealed. "That's so sweet of him to do." Rachel turned her head away and said mostly to herself, "Why doesn't Finn do nice things like that?"

"Um, didn't he ask you to marry him?" I asked. I might have been highly against it, but she needed some kind of motivation.

Rachel nodded. "That still shouldn't stop him from doing nice things," she added. "Oh! I almost forgot. His parents are coming over to our house for dinner. After we kind of spilled the beans about marriage, my dads insisted." Rachel sighed, "I have a very bad feeling. What if things don't end well? What if they tell us Finn and I can't get married?"

"You're only seventeen," I said. "Besides, what happened to the old Rachel I knew that put New York and her career before everything else?"

"She's still there," Rachel said. "I just fell in love with someone, that's all." I frowned at her. She used to be so determined and driven by New York and Broadway. It was almost upsetting to see her acting like this. I turned my head and copied down some notes, giving no more thought to Rachel's marriage to Finn or anything else… well, I will admit that Rory did invade my mind again. I just wanted to see him before lunch, just to tell him thanks for all he's done. I ran a hand through my hair, pulling out a stray confetti heart. I smiled and set it aside on my desk.

During lunch, I still hadn't seen Rory. He must have been in school. Kurt kept hinting about it all through French. I sighed and stared down at my PB&J sandwich. "It's alright, Christine," Rachel patted me on the back. "He's probably busy planning something else for you?" The grin on her face told me that was a very possible idea. I rolled my eyes and slowly ate my lunch. Everyone at the table mingled about their Valentine's Day plans right after glee club.

"Sugar was kind enough to invite us all to Breadstix for a Valentine's Day dance-party," Brittany said.

"She even invited me?" I asked, not really believing it. Sugar and I weren't on the best of terms, even when I told her nicely that Rory wasn't interested in her. I was thankful that she hadn't tried anything to get him back, especially now that he and I were together.

"I'm pretty sure she forgot all about your little quarrel," Rachel said.

"I wouldn't be so sure," I added. The rest of lunch continued with small talk and of course talk about their new assignment. Mr. Schuster wanted them to sing love songs in honor of Valentine's Day. It was a little late notice, but everyone seemed excited about it. It was optional to participate. I would have whipped something up, but I was so busy with the play that when I got home I was always exhausted. "Has anyone seen Rory today?" I asked. No one said he wasn't here, I was curious to know if they were covering for him or if they really hadn't seen him.

Most of the table shrugged and shook their heads. Where was he? I wondered. The others continued to talk about their songs of choice while I retreated back into the depths of my own mind, thinking about Rory. I was itching to see him by this point. I just wanted to run up to him and kiss him! Kissing Rory… it was Valentine's Day, I reminded myself. Maybe if I pray hard enough that little wish of mine would come true, a blush rose to my cheeks as I thought about it; my heart thudded against my chest. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy taking things slow. It was just that sometimes I wanted it to happen already! I won't even mention to you the scenarios that popped into my head once or twice.

I wanted the hours to go by faster once lunch ended. I wanted to see Rory, if he was even here. I hoped he was here, otherwise that would just suck on my end. I wandered back to my locker where only a few confetti hears littered the floor. This time when I opened it up I was greeted with another little card that read "Valentine's." I rolled my eyes, giggling to myself. I think I can piece together the final bit of the message at this point. I took the card and placed it with the other. I put away the books I wouldn't need for my next few classes. "Day," I heard someone say. I closed my locker slowly, and sure enough Rory was there leaning against other lockers.

I smiled at him. "Isn't there supposed to be a card for that?" I pulled out the other two and showed them to him. "You are full of strange surprises, Rory."

"I know," he grinned. "But what's to say that I'm not the next card?"

"I'd love it if you were," I said honestly. "But I can't exactly fold you up and stick you in my pocket." I walked over to him and kissed his cheek. "Where have you been all day? I wanted to thank you at lunch."

"Don't thank me just yet," he said. "There's still one more thing I haven't done yet." The blood roared in my ears and my breathing became hitched. His intentions could have been completely different from what I was imagining.

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's a surprise," he kissed me on the forehead before returning to his class. I watched him go before groaning out loud. What was he going to do? I had to know! He was going to kill me with the suspense before I could make it to glee club. Lucky for me, I didn't die as last block finally rolled around. I ran to the choir room, shoving a few kids out of my way in the process. I ran to my usual seat and sat down, out of breath. Rachel and Kurt both stared at me with strange looks. "He said it was a surprise. I'm dying to know!"

"Did it ever occur to you that he might serenade you with a song?" Kurt asked. "We are in glee club after all."

Sometimes I have my dumb moments, and this was one of them. "Oh," I said. "That is a very good assumption, Kurt." I began blushing at the thought of being serenaded by Rory. Hey, don't all girls want to be serenaded by adorable guys? I asked myself. Mr. Schuster walked into the room, being followed by a few of our glee club males. Rory was there, as was Finn and Mike and Puck and Artie and Blaine and Sam.

"So the guys had something special planned to sing," Mr. Schue said. He gestured for them to take it away. The boys got into position before the music began playing. Rory was singing lead, and he was staring right at me while he did. I buried my face in my hands when he began singing. There was going to be no way to wipe off this blush, no way…

"_My head is stuck in the clouds, she begs me to come down says 'Boy, quit foolin' around,' I told her, I love the view from up here. Warm sun and wind in my ear, we'll watch the world from above as it turns to the rhythm of love._"

The boys did some strange kind of coordinated dance routine while they sang. I wasn't the only girl with a smile on her face. Rory wandered over to me as he continued singing. "_We may only have tonight, but 'till the morning sun you're mine, all mine. Play the music low and sway to the rhythm of love…_" He grabbed me by the hands. I shook my head 'no' repeatedly. Rory wasn't giving up though. He pulled me to my feet and brought me down to where the other guys were. I stood there awkwardly, glancing at Rachel and Kurt every now and then.

"_Well my heart beats like a drum, guitar string to the strum, a beautiful song to be sung. She's got blue eyes deep like the sea that roll back when she's laughin' at me, she rises up like the tide the moment her lips meet mine._" Instead of kissing him on the lips (I felt it would have been over the boarder-line of awkward) I kissed him on the cheek and smiled. So this is why he was AWOL for most of the day. I had a feeling that some of these guys were covering for him, lying by saying they hadn't seen him.

"_We may only have tonight, but 'till the morning sun you're mine, all mine. Play the music low and sway to the rhythm of love._" Rory took me by surprise when he grabbed my hands and started dancing with me. The two of us weren't alone. The others were all brought to their feet to join in on the fun. Majority of the pairings went with the appropriate couples while others danced for fun. "_When the moon is low we can dance in slow motion, and all your tears will subside, all your tears will dry. And long after I've gone you'll still be humming along, and I will keep you in my mind, the way to make love so fine._"

He wasn't that great of a dancer, neither of us was. He twirled me around a couple of times before we danced a terrible box-step. "_We may only have tonight, but 'till the morning sun you're mine, all mine. Play the music low and sway to the rhythm of love_." I kissed his cheek again when the song ended.

"You really are full of surprises," I said. "Thank you. No one's ever done something like that for me."

Rory blushed and looked down at his feet, "You're welcome. And Happy Valentine's Day, Christine."

So, there was no first-kiss like I imagined. Was I bummed, sure but not by much. His serenade was all I needed to make this the best Valentine's Day ever. I decided that instead of wishing for things to happen when I wanted them too, I would let it all fall into place. The way it's supposed to be.


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: THIS IS WHAT YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR! Only eight more chapters to go until this story comes to a close; which will probably be by the end of the summer, or earlier (I hope)! Meaning that I'll be dedicating more of my time to this story so I can finish this at last. It's been fun. (: And to be honest, I cried when I wrote this, and then giggled hysterically. It's not a pretty picture, but FINALLY! Stay tuned for chapter twenty-three.**

A week later I found myself in the auditorium during a free period. Rory had texted me, curious as to where I vanished off to. I am glad to say that since Valentine's Day the two of us have grown closer. Unfortunately, there was still no first couple kiss. I sighed and picked up the script, taking a seat on a prop. I flipped through the pages before landing on the rooftop scene. It was one we hadn't had the chance to rehearse yet. I felt a little awkward at the fact that I had to kiss both Blaine and Mike. Both boys were taken and I made a mental note to apologize various times to their rightful companions.

Not that Tina and Kurt cared about me kissing their boyfriends. It was always something that bugged me. I didn't want them to think that I would end up stealing their boyfriends over a kissing scene. Alas, I was also taken so there really was nothing for me to worry about. I realized I thought too much on topics. What if Rory became jealous that I kissed these boys before him? See why I was so eager for us to kiss already? I skimmed the lines to the rooftop scene. This was the one after the Phantom had killed Joseph Buquet. Christine Daae fled with Raoul, explaining the danger they were in.

The song in this scene was my favorite out of all the other songs in the play; it was swooning, as well as heartbreaking. My attention turned to the double doors as they opened. Rory strolled down the aisle. "This was the last place I'd thought to find you," he said. "I looked everywhere." I smiled as he jumped up on stage to kiss me on the cheek.

"Sorry for not texting you back," I said. "I was a little too wrapped up in my work." I held up my copy of the script and gave him a weak smile. Rory shrugged his shoulders and took a seat across from me. His backpack was resting beside mine in the front row of the audience. "I'm nervous for this," I admitted after a few minutes of silence. I looked up and caught Rory's gaze. "I'm no actor. I just wanted Rachel to get a taste of her own medicine."

What was I saying? Of course I wanted this! "Phantom of the Opera" was my obsession (other than journalism) and everyone knew it. "What if everyone thinks I'm terrible?" I asked as I pondered the worst scenarios in my mind. "What if I screw up on the singing?" I stared at Rory with wide and frightened eyes. "What if I pass out?"

He chuckled lightly, shaking his head at my sudden outburst of fears. "It's just a school play," he said. "Making mistakes is humane, and no one is going to think you're terrible. You are very talented Christine, and not just in writing." Hearing those words come from him made me blush. I was just overreacting about the whole thing. It hadn't come to my attention before all the rehearsals and such, probably because we were all too excited and wanted to get right to work.

"What scene were you working on?" he asked after another few minutes of silence. I handed him the script that was open to the rooftop scene.

"We haven't gone over it yet," I explained. A smile formed on my lips, "But now that you're here, maybe you can help me prepare?"

"You want me to sing too?" he questioned, reading over the lines.

"The entire scene is filled with singing," I said. "It's the one song I could never really sing." When I sang, I liked to sing with true emotion. Meaning I was really going to have to get into the character's head to feel the words. It was a love song, no doubt about that. Maybe singing it with Rory would spark something?

Rory opened up his mouth to speak, but he closed it and shook his head. I blushed, wondering if he had read over the multiple kisses Blaine and I would end up sharing as the song comes to a close. "You won't be jealous, right?" I asked him in a teasing manner. Rory blushed, shaking his head with that adorable boyish grin on his face. "Good," I told him. At least I knew now that I didn't have to worry so much about it.

I pulled by the hand so he was in standing position. I grabbed a spare script from backstage before rejoining Rory. Even though I already knew the words by heart, I felt less nervous when I held the stack of paper in my hands. "I'll start," I said. I took a deep breath before flipping one page back, Rory followed my lead. "._.. but his voice filled my spirit with a strange, sweet sound. In the night, there was music in my mind... and through music, my soul began to soar. And I heard as I never heard before._"

"_What you heard was a dream and nothing more,_" Rory sang quietly. I adored his singing voice. It sent shivers down my spine; it was refreshing to listen to.

"_Yet in his eyes, all the sadness of the world, those pleading eyes that both threatened and adored..._"

"Christine... Christine..." There was supposed to be a third even quieter 'Christine' coming from the Phantom. Of course, we skipped that small bit as well as one other short line. Even though there was no music, Rory and I managed to play the song with the tune in our heads. Mr. Schue had made all of us listen to the Phantom soundtrack of our choice on repeat until we had the beats, notes and lyrics engraved in our minds.

"_No more talk of darkness, forget these wide-eyed fears. I'm here, nothing can harm you-my words will warm and calm you. Let me be your freedom, let daylight dry your tears. I'm here, with you, beside you, to guard you and to guide you..._"

I had my back turned to Rory as he sang Raoul's piece. I wanted to get into the zone of the scene so I was comfortable with what would or might happen on stage. "_Say you love me every waking moment, turn my head with talk of summertime. Say you need me with you now and always... promise me that all you say is true-that's all I ask of you._"

My heart lifted inside my chest, as I turned around to stare at Rory, who continued the song. I felt the heat rise up to my cheeks as we sang back and forth. We managed to get to the point of holding hands, and were standing rather close to each other. I could see the light tint of blush sprouting on Rory's cheeks as well. "T_hen say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime. Let me lead you from your solitude. Say you need me with you here, beside you... anywhere you go, let me go too-Christine, that's all I ask of you._"

For a minute there, I forgot he was singing the words from the script and thought he was talking about _me_ Christine, not the character. My heart was racing, so far this was one of the most romantic moments we've had; script or no script. I was loving every second of it. "_Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime... say the word and I will follow you._" Together we sang, "_Share each day with me, each night, each morning..._" I sang, "_Say you love me..._"

He sang, "_You know I do_.."

Together again, "_Love me-that's all I ask of you..._"

I thought my heart was going to explode from my chest in that moment. Our faces were just inches apart as we finished those last two stanzas quietly. Neither of us could wait any longer. Rory quickly closed the gap between our lips. I smiled into the kiss. His hands snaked around my waist, pulling me closer into his body. I slid my arms around his neck, hugging him into me, never wanting to let this blissful moment end. My heart was melting, or at least that's what I imagined it doing. We pulled away, letting the remainder of the song fly over our heads.

Rory and I were too wrapped up in each other to care. I stared up at him as he stared down at me. Our eyes met and remained like that, we grinned like fools and I giggled like a schoolgirl. This was definitely the highlight of my year. It couldn't have been any more romantic than that. So, instead of practicing like I had intentionally planned, we sat on the stage cuddling; Rory and I kissed some more; short, sweet stolen kisses here and there as we waited for the remainder of the block to end. The moment didn't include any speaking, which I didn't mind.

We parted ways after a few more kisses in the auditorium when the bell rang. I walked out of there with a real smile on my face, accompanied by a dreamy gaze and a light sigh when I spotted Rachel standing by her locker. She studied me closely, probably wondering why I had that tiny smile etched onto my face. "So you're coming to my sleepover, right?" she asked me cautiously. I nodded my head. "Why are you smiling like that? It's starting to freak me out a little."

Good, now she knows how I felt whenever she would come to me with her smile. "I'll tell you tonight," I said. I bit down on my lip, walking away and letting Rachel watch me as I did. I wandered solo to my class, the only things on my mind were Rory and that kiss.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Only seven more chapters to go! A lot will be happening. More Rory and Christine time. Some upsetting news. Prom is not too far away! I have a lot planned for these next few chapters. Anyways I had a question for you lovely readers. If you have seen it, what did you think of the sequel "Love Never Dies?" To me (in Christine's own words) I don't like to think of it as a direct Phantom sequel. I like it as a "what-if" story. Overall it was still a lovely production. Though the song "Bathing Beauty" made me want to shoot my brains out. Anyways, enjoy! :)**

With all the people around during play rehearsals, Rory and I had to keep our distance. Of course that didn't stop us from stealing glances and smiles every now and then. Kurt looked at me suspiciously. I let the smile drop from my face as Mr. Schuster began ordering us to our places. Kurt knew something was up, as did Rachel. Of course I wouldn't tell them of my heart-melting kiss with Rory until tonight. Rachel had planned a ladies sleepover, inviting me and Mercedes and of course Kurt. She had invited the other ladies of glee, but they were either busy or lied about having plans.

"These moves need to be in sync," Mr. Schue strained. "Brittany, your section is moving too quickly, Rachel, your section is moving too slowly." Rachel rolled her eyes. We were currently working on the "Masquerade" ball scene. All the extras and majority of the cast were trying to perfect the dance sequence that took place during this part. There was no singing, not yet. It wasn't going to be pretty. Blaine and I stood off to the side of the stage, watching as the madness unfolded before us. Our characters have been secretly engaged and all Raoul wants to do is tell everyone, Christine tells him it's not the right time.

"We'll skip over the dialogue bits and jump right into the chorus. You guys need to keep with the tempo, no falling behind or jumping ahead! It looks sloppy if you do," Mr. Schue explained. Everyone rolled their eyes when his back was turned. "This time try it with singing, I'll have the music going." He hit the play button and the tune started up again for the millionth time. Blaine and I had known our roles in the scene, and we didn't have to be on key with anyone else until the near end of the song "Masquerade" a few minutes before the start of "Why So Silent?"

I watched closely as the large group began singing and dancing. The beginning as always was the best... then from there everything went downhill; some clusters forgot the moves or the words. Mike joined Blaine and I a few minutes later. This rehearsing time was dedicated to the extras of the play. Mr. Schuster bit down on his lip and frowned at what he was seeing. He stopped the music and everyone else awkwardly ended their singing at different times. "You all really need to work on this at home," he told them. "Alright, now let's go back a few pages and start rehearsing 'Prima Donna.'"

Blaine, Mercedes, Finn and Sam took the stage. None of them looked too pleased. Who would be after all of Mr. Schuster's constant complaints and interjections? With their scripts in hand, Mr. Schuster directed them to Finn's line. "And, action!" Mr. Schuster jumped off the stage and watched from the front row of seats as the scene unfolded. Finn cleared his throat before reading, "Miss Daae will be playing the Pageboy—the silent role." "Carlotta will be playing the lead," Sam joined Finn. And on rehearsals went, for another two hours.

* * *

><p>"Ugh," Rachel groaned. "I thought it would never end."<p>

"You aren't the only one," I said. In January when we first started rehearsals everything was great. It was fun and we enjoyed it. Now with only a full month to go and only two weeks in April, things weren't looking so great. Mr. Schuster hounded on all of us to exceed his expectations. Hey, we aren't professionals! I suppose that ever since the "West Side Story" performance, he wanted this one to be just as great. "I can only imagine how much you'll all mess up when you're wearing the costumes and masks for that scene."

Rachel shuddered. We met Kurt in the parking lot. He would drop us off at Rachel's before joining us later in the evening. Mercedes would be with him. "What did you have planned for this sleepover?" I questioned her as we entered her house. The Berry home was very well decorated; I swear there was a new vibe to each room every time I came here. Her fathers wouldn't be home until late, probably well past the time Kurt, Rachel, Mercedes and I were fast asleep.

Rachel took a deep breath and began to ponder. "Watch movies, order pizza eat loads of junk food, do some karaoke and gossip before bed." She glanced at me. We both plopped down on her bed and stared up at the ceiling. "Oh, Christine can't you just tell me what's been putting you in this good mood?" I didn't want to tell her, the good friend in me wanted her to plead some more until I finally gave in. I smiled thinking about the kiss again. I turned my head to the side to stare at Rachel's face. Her bottom lip was puffed out and she was giving me that puppy-look, thinking it would work on me.

"That doesn't work with me Rachel," I giggled. "How many times do I have to tell you?"

"You're killing me Christine!" Rachel rolled off the bed and paced her room. "I could hardly focus in class because I was thinking about all of the things that could make you this way. First it was thinking that you were accepted by the New York Journal or getting into those two colleges, then I started thinking about the play, and then I thought maybe you and Rory finally kissed." My mouth formed an unavoidable smile. Rachel's eyes widened and she too began grinning. "Oh my god," she said. "You _did_?"

Slowly I nodded, blushing as Rachel squealed and bounced around her room. "Okay, details! When, where, what, how?" She rejoined me on her bed, listening intently as I told her the story of mine and Rory's first couple's kiss. Rachel awed many times while I told her. "Just like in the actual play," she said. "Kind of..."

"We completely forgot about the song after it happened, and we just continued kissing until the period ended."

"Scandalous," Rachel exclaimed. "But I'm so happy for you. Aw, you guys are a real couple now!" She clasped her hands together under her chin and sighed. The next hour was spent talking about our boyfriends before we went downstairs to gather up the snacks for the sleepover. Rachel pulled out various colorful bowls while I began dumping the contents into them; pretzels, chips and even candy. Rachel was popping popcorn over the stove.

Minutes later there was the doorbell rang. I glanced at the clock which read the time as being six. I hadn't realized the hours went by so quickly while Rachel and I talked of nonsense. I heard the voices of Kurt and Mercedes after Rachel let them in. Before the popcorn could burn and lose its taste, I pulled it off the stove and set it aside to cool. "Christine!" Kurt's voice shouted. I heard footsteps pounding against the wooden floors. I quickly turned around and stared at Kurt. "Why didn't tell me the minute it happened?"

I glared at Rachel, "I was supposed to tell them!" Rachel had a sheepish look on her face. She bit her lip and shrugged her shoulders. I rolled my eyes and turned back to Kurt. "Yes, Rory and I kissed; hopefully Rachel didn't give away all the details."

"There are details?" Mercedes questioned. She raised her eyebrows twice in an amusing manner.

I blushed and giggled nervously. "Kind of." I sighed, just thinking of it made me swoon all over again. I wanted nothing more than to be with Rory and kiss him until my lips fell off. Not literally, but I think you get my meaning. I just wanted to be with him, nothing more.

"Kind of?" Mercedes scoffed. "By the way Rachel was fan-girling over it, I'd say there were plenty of details to be told." The red filled my cheeks again and my insides quivered with the good kind of nerves. Before I could even begin retelling the story, Rachel interrupted.

"I say we all change and get comfortable before Christine tells her story." Each of us grabbed a bowl and brought them upstairs to Rachel's room. They teased me all the way up the stairs; I had no response for their childish behavior. It was now that I was beginning to realize that we wouldn't have moments like this with each other anymore. By the end of this year we would all be going our own ways. _Don't start thinking of that right now_, I told myself. _There's still some time left._

After we all changed into our pyjamas. The four of us got comfortable on Rachel's bed. From left to right it was Mercedes, Rachel, me and Kurt. "Details, let's go!" Each of us held onto a different snack bowl, I had the one filled with chips, Kurt had the pretzels, Mercedes had the popcorn and Rachel was stuck with the candy. Every ten minutes we would rotate the bowls, so we all had a shot at eating the unhealthy treats.

"So," I began. "I had a free period with no homework to do or articles to edit. I decided to waste time rehearsing 'All I Ask of You' in the auditorium. Of course I went over lines as well. Then I got a text from Rory, but I never responded to it since I was so caught up in my work." I could hear them chewing slowly on their junk food. "He came and found me minutes after sending the text. He sounded out of breath when he walked into the auditorium, so I guess he ran around looking for me."

"Continue," Kurt said. He looked at me as if this were the most interesting thing he had ever heard. It was the same look Rachel had given me earlier when she figured it out.

I continued. "I asked him for some help with the song and he agreed. Even though there was no music we managed to do it, since Mister Schuster forced us all to listen to the CD a million times." I was rambling, and by doing so these three were on the edges of their seats (so to speak). "We sang and sang… and I didn't realize it but we moved closer to each other. When that bridge of the song came, we kissed. I don't know how to explain it, my mind was elsewhere." I stared off into space, and I didn't need anyone to tell me that I had a dreamy look on my face. I knew it was there, I had never been that happy before… especially after my father's accident.

"That's so romantic," Mercedes said. "Why can't someone do that for me?"

"I'm sure Sam would be more than willing if you gave him a shot," Rachel said. "Stop turning him down."

"I know, but I'm dating someone else. I just can't drop my boyfriend just to be with Sam." It was eating her up inside, I could tell. She cared dearly for them both, but she was worried that whatever choice she did make both boys would end up hating her. Our topics slowly changed until around eight-thirty we decided to put in a movie.

"How about some 'Love Never Dies?'" Rachel asked. "I just got it the other day." We all laughed. "Love Never Dies" is the "sequel" to "The Phantom of the Opera." I never liked to think of it as a direct sequel to my favorite play. I liked to think of "Love Never Dies" more as a "what-if" kind of story. The music was lovely, but not as lovely as in Phantom. Still, with both I managed to cry every time.

"No Phantoms," I said before she could put in the DVD. "I think we all need a relaxing break from anything that has to do with the play, especially after today's rehearsals." Rachel slowly nodded. We all decided on the chick flick "Clueless." Into the third movie of the night, the four of us drifted off to sleep with the empty snack bowls surrounding us.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Two chapters in two days! I'm starting to get into the story now that it's coming to a close. Instead of having thirty chapters like I said, this will have twenty-nine. I combined two chapters together in this one. It's made my life a little easier. Enjoy!**

By the time March rolled around, colleges were pestering me with spam. I rolled my eyes at my inbox, scoffing at all the colleges telling me that there was still time left to apply. I only applied to two, Harvard and Brown. How did these other places get my e-mail? I wondered. Come to think of it, I should be hearing back from those two quite soon. The thought made my stomach twist and turn uncomfortably. This was it; my future was already on the line. If I didn't get into either of them I would have to pray my heart out that the New York Journal accepted me. If I got rejected from all three, I don't know what I would do.

The bell rang, directing us all to our final class of the day. I found Rory standing by his locker putting away textbooks and binders. I quietly slid up behind him and kissed his cheek. I blushed and leaned against the locker. Rory had a small smile playing on his lips as he continued pulling books and things out of his bag. "How was your day?" he asked, staring at me as he began closing his locker.

"Long, boring, the usual," I replied. "And yours?" The two of us began walking away from the lockers and down the hall towards the auditorium. Other students quickly ran to their classrooms, afraid of receiving demerits and detentions. When the halls were empty Rory grabbed my hand as we continued walking. He respected my dislike for PDA, for it also made him feel nervous and embarrassed. As we entered the auditorium, I was upset to find that we weren't alone. A few other extras along with Kurt and Blaine were in there as well. All of them were rehearsing the whole cast choreography of "Masquerade." That part of the song was the easiest for everyone; it was the rest of the song that threw everyone off. Even after a month rehearsing this scene they still couldn't get it.

"Looks like we won't be alone this time," Rory said. I gave him a comforting smile as we joined out friends and casemates on the stage. We couldn't leave now, we've been spotted. Sadly I was going to have to be in here longer than I would have liked. While the extras rehearsed, Blaine and I stood off to the side and went over some lines. When others began arriving as the school day came to a close, Mr. Schuster was happy to see us all there, early and ready to deal with his changing opinions.

During rehearsals we went over the "Masquerade" scene again. Mr. Schuster commented that it was looking better than it had a few weeks ago. More work was still needed. We went over the whole beginning from the auction all through "Angel of Music." So far it was looking great. The next scene was the one both Blaine and I were a little nervous for, but we put our fears behind ourselves and followed the script for "All I Ask of You." I knew this scene forwards and backwards. I left my script aside and let the character Christine Daae take over.

"There is no Phantom of the Opera!" Blaine read. He kept his eyes glued to his script, glancing up every now and then. I took it that he hadn't really looked this scene over as much as the others. It was just a few kisses, I reminded myself. And they don't mean anything. We're both taken. I took a deep breath and began Christine's piece.

"Raoul I've been there… to his world of unending night… to a world where the daylight dissolves into darkness…darkness… Raoul I've seen him… can I ever forget that sight? Can I ever escape from that face? So distorted, deformed… it was hardly a face in that darkness… darkness. But his voice filled my spirit with a strange, sweet sound… in that night there was music in my mind… and through music my soul began to soar. And I heard as I've never heard before."

"What you heard was a dream and nothing more." Blaine lowered his script and stared at my character with large, circular eyes. We were starting to get into it. The next line was one of my favorites in the entire play.

"Yet in his eyes, all the sadness of the world… those pleading eyes that both threatened… and adored."

We followed through with the song, letting our characters surface and not ourselves. The first kiss was simple. We held each other and then pulled away to match the music as we sang the last two lines. Following the script, we kissed a couple more times before concluding the romantic scene. "That was excellent you two," Mr. Schuster said. "Alright, now Mike come on out and sing the reprise." Blaine and I stood to the side of the stage and watched Mike preform his piece.

"_You will curse the day you did not do… all that the Phantom asked of you!_"

_Let's go out tonight._ I grinned at the text Rory had sent me mere minutes ago as rehearsals ended. Rory found me backstage; I smiled as he wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my cheek. I giggled like a fool and turned around so his arms never left their position. I came to realize that time was flying by, and there were only so many moments Rory and I would have together. He still hadn't said anything about returning home, and I still had no answer for him about where my future would take me.

"Where did you want to take me?" I asked, letting my hands rest on his shoulders.

"Anywhere," he said. "We could go for a walk in the park or spend time at the mall or go to dinner?"

"Walking in the park sounds nice," I grinned.

"Your friends are corrupting you," Rory teased. He released his arms and walked with me towards our backpacks. I giggled and picked up my belongings. Most of the cast was long gone when Mr. Schuster called it quits for the day. "How about I stop by at seven so we can slowly walk around the park? I'll be sure to have you home before ten."

"That's something you should be telling Rose," I poked his arm, "Not me."

When it came for us to part ways, Rory pulled me close to him and kissed me full on the mouth. I sighed into the kiss, letting my arms snake around his neck. I refused to let this moment end, but we both had places to be. After a few short pecks we were on our way. As usual I walked home, faster than I normally had. It was colder even though spring would be upon us soon. I couldn't wait for spring and then the summer. I grabbed the mail from the mailbox before making my way down the path to the front door. I flipped through the letters and spotted two with my name on them, they were from the two schools I applied too.

My stopped for a few seconds and my eyes widened. I ran into the house and threw everything down once I reached the kitchen. Rose quickly turned around from her spot at the stove. "You scared the crap out of me!" she held a wooden spoon in her left hand and an oven mitt in the other. I ignored her outburst and opened the first letter from Harvard. I could feel it already, the rejection. _Dear Miss Christine Fay, with sincere regret, I must report that the Committee on Admissions has completed its selection of the class entering in September 2012 and has not been able to offer you a place…_ I lowered the letter and frowned. I knew this much would happen, Harvard was a reach school and only the best were accepted.

Rose picked up the letter as I opened the second one from Brown. "Oh Christine," Rose said. "There's no need to rush the future, remember that." Again I ignored her as I read Brown University's letter. _Dear Miss Christine Fay, due to the demanding amount of student applications, I must inform you that yours has been chosen to be waitlisted. We shall contact you with a final decision when the time comes._

My throat tightened and my mouth suddenly became dry. My stomach felt loose, as did every other part of my body. This couldn't be happening. The muscles in my face began to feel stiff and sore and I could feel the tears brimming at my eyes. There was still a chance that I could get in, but I knew I wouldn't. Being waitlisted was just a nicer way of saying that it's highly unlikely you will attend this college.

I let the paper fall from my hands as I ran out of the kitchen and up to my room. "Christine!" Rose shouted after me. I was glad she didn't follow. I slammed the door and started crying. I hadn't cried like this since my dad's death. I placed my back against the door and slid down it until I reached the floor. I cradled my head in my hands and just sobbed. I wasn't sure how long I sat there. My future was on the line, and all I could think about was another rejection coming from the New York Journal. Would it be enough to send me over the edge…?

_Stop thinking like that Christine; regardless of what happens you do have a future in front of you. No one said this was all going to be easy. You have to fight for what you want; no one will give it to you._ I have fought, for a lot of things. The most recent would be beating Rachel for the role of Christine. I put my entire being into wanting that role, even if it meant losing a friend in the process. I fought to overcome my minor depression when my dad passed away. _Life isn't easy._

My eyes were dry from the salty tears, my throat felt raw and unused. Slowly I stood up from the floor and wandered across the hall to the bathroom. As I glanced at the clock in my room, after freshening myself up, it was almost seven. Rory would be here soon. Now I wasn't so sure if I wanted to go out with him tonight, especially after what I had gone through. "You're going," I told myself. I stared at my reflection in the mirror as I straightened out my wrinkled shirt. I brushed my tangled hair. "You're going to tell him what happened, and even though he won't be able to fix it, he'll still comfort you." Rose wanted to comfort me, but I pushed her away before she had the chance.

I joined her downstairs. She was sitting at the dining room table reading over her work. I walked over to her as she glanced up at me. Her smile was sympathetic and I hugged her. "It'll be okay Christine," she whispered in my ear. "Don't worry about it." If only I could. I occupied the chair adjacent to where Rose did her work. We didn't talk much; she said it was important that she got her things sorted out before the morning. And then, the doorbell rang. "Are you expecting someone?" she asked.

"It's Rory," I muttered, blushing. "We were going to go for a walk if that's alright?"

Rose nodded, "Just not too late… and no funny business!"

My face grew warm and I gasped at her, "What kind of person do you think I am?" She waved me off. I joined Rory outside after putting on a jacket. I would have held hands, but his were shoved deep into the pockets of his coat. So instead I slipped my arm through his.

"You seem upset," he said. My smile faltered as we walked along the sidewalk. "Is something wrong?"

"It's just been a rough evening," I told him. The park wasn't too far from my house. It took us five minutes to get there.

We walked in silence when Rory finally asked, "Do you want to tell me what was troubling you?"

I looked at him and hesitated. I leaned my head on his shoulder as our pace slowed down. "I got a rejection letter and a waitlisted letter today."

"Oh Christine," he said. "I'm sorry to hear about that."

"I was a mess," I told him. "I'm scared… what if I also get rejected from the New York Journal?" I removed my head from his arm and stared up at him. "I don't want to be rejected again."

Rory sighed, "I can't really promise you anything… but maybe it'll all work out in the end; whether you get that position or not. The end of the world isn't going to happen because you don't get accepted." Rory lightly kissed my forehead. We resumed walking, letting the topic of conversation change from worry and rejection to the musical. "Are you nervous?"

I thought about it for a minute. "For now not really; though I'm sure when opening night rolls around, I'll start to panic. I've never done something this big before. I've always watched from the sidelines." It was out of my comfort zone. I was so used to watching performances and writing about them later on, but this time would be different. Rory and I sat down on a bench, watching other couples, friends and owners with their pets walk by us.

"Christine," Rory said. I sat up and looked at him. Rory bit his lip, glancing at the ground before meeting my eyes. "Uh… never mind." The curiosity made me wonder what he wanted to say. Rory took a deep breath and slumped down into the bench. I moved back to my original position, letting my mind wander along the various possibilities. Was he going to say what I thought he was going to say? I felt the heat creep into my face. No, it was far too soon. Besides I wasn't even sure if I felt the same way.

I let my eyes trail up to his face. He was hiding something, or at least that's what it looked like. What was he hiding that he couldn't possibly say?


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: This was more of a filler chapter if anything. I might go back and re-edit this later, but we'll see. More time skips! Next chapter is opening night! There's been too much rejection lately, things will start looking up for everyone. :) Enjoy!**

On April tenth, after school I received the letter. Rose and I left it on the counter, untouched and unopened. My heart dropped right to my stomach. It was _the_ letter that I had been waiting for so long for; the one that would really decide my future since I wasn't going to Harvard and probably not going to Brown either. "Aren't you going to open it?" Rose asked me. I glanced at her and ran out of the room, delaying the news. I decided that I would open it tomorrow; right now Rachel needed me, as did Kurt. Even though Kurt gave it his all, Rachel was the one who put her future on the line by choking on her go-to song: "Don't Rain on My Parade." She's a mess.

At the moment, Finn was probably comforting her. I told Rachel I would call her as soon as I got home, but I didn't want to ruin their moment. It was so upsetting to see someone so driven by preforming have their entire future destroyed by one simple mistake. She couldn't have been nervous, but then again she managed to get the lines wrong. I sighed and sat down on my bed. She wasn't the only one who was having a rough day. Just thinking about the letter sitting downstairs on the table made my head spin and my stomach churn.

What if it was another rejection? I couldn't afford another rejection. Rachel's future wasn't the only thing on the line right now. My phone began to ring. I shuffled through my bag before answering Rachel's call. Before I could even greet her, she began blubbering to me from the other end of the line. I could hardly make out what she was saying. I frowned as she continued to speak before ending it with a sudden sob. I honestly didn't know what to say to her. I opened my mouth and closed it, listening to her quietly cry. A list of things I could have said ran through my mind, but none of them would have really comforted Rachel.

"I may not know how you feel," I began. _At least, not yet I don't._ "But crying about this isn't going to reverse anything." I paused, Rachel continued to sob. I wasn't sure what she should do now.

"She gave me a second chance," I managed to understand. "And I still blew it!"

The two of us didn't say much after that. Instead we kept the line open saying nothing at all. "I have to go tell my dads," she said after an hour. I nodded even though she couldn't see it. She ended the call. I tossed my phone across the bed and continued to stare up at the ceiling.

The following morning I grabbed the envelope that would decide my fate and shoved it into my bag. I was running late, so I didn't bother with breakfast. I would regret it later, I know. I ran up the deserted front steps and towards my locker. Kids were already making their way to class just as I was gathering up my things for the day. The envelope fell out of my bag and landed on the floor. I threw notebooks and textbooks into my locker before I had the chance to pick it up. But, another hand took the liberty from me.

"What's this?" Rory asked. He turned the envelope over in his hands to read the front. I closed my locker and took a deep breath.

"My letter from the New York Journal," I said. "I got it yesterday." I was ready to bolt to class, but Rory decided to chat a little longer.

"You didn't open it?" he quirked an eyebrow and handed the envelope over to me. I shook my head.

"No, I can't take another rejection; if it is a rejection. I can't talk; I need to get to class."

"But I need to tell you something," Rory turned around, following me down the hall.

"Can it wait until later? I'm late," I left him standing in the middle of the hall as I hurried off to class. I felt bad, but I hated arriving late to class. I slipped into the room before the teacher could notice. Her back was turned as she slowly wrote on the board. I sat down beside Rachel, my heart still pounding from hurrying to class. Rachel still looked upset, I figured she would be for quite a while. I placed a comforting hand on her shoulder; she looked at me with those large, sad eyes before noticing the envelope on the table.

"Is that what I think it is?" there wasn't much excitement in her voice. I nodded. "And you didn't open it?"

"You were kind of a wreck," I said honestly. "Not to mention I was afraid to open it. You aren't the only one who's worried about a full rejection."

"You have to open it," Rachel said. "What if you got accepted?"

"I'll open it later," I lowered my voice to a whisper as our teacher started class.

The entire day the only thing I could focus on was the envelope and my future that would be determined by it. All I had to do was open it and read the letter inside, that wasn't so difficult. It was lunch time and everyone put their attention on me. Rory sat to my right, quietly eating his lunch. I flipped the envelope over and started tearing away at the back flap. I pulled out the sheet of paper and slowly unfolded it. I sighed and glanced at everyone once more before reading the opening sentence.

_Dear Miss Christine Fay, After a thorough read of your work we would like to inform you that you have been accepted for a position at the New York Journal as a travel journalist._ My eyes widened, I could hear the blood pounding in my ears and my palms began sweating. Am I dreaming? I wondered.

"What does it say, Christine?" Rachel asked from my left.

"I got in." Honestly I didn't think I was going to be this shocked. "I've been accepted!" The table erupted into a chorus of cheers and congratulations. I could feel the smile making its way onto my face. My future wasn't going to be destroyed. I turned to Rory and smiled at him, he smiled back, but it looked like he was holding something back. I furrowed my eyebrows in curiosity. I remembered that he still had something to tell me.

"Congratulations," he said before kissing me on the cheek. My smile faltered; all I wanted to know was what he wanted to tell me. Of course it wasn't until glee club that I and everyone else found out.

"I have something to say before we start, is that alright?" Rory walked over to Mr. Schuster just as our choir practice began. Confused, Mr. Schue let Rory have the floor and told the class to settle down. It took a minute before Rory could find his words. "I went to get my student visa renewed so I could spend another year here, but I was rejected." I didn't need any further explanation to understand that in just two short months Rory would be going home. It felt like someone punched me right in the gut. I didn't want to believe his words; I didn't want him to leave.

_Maybe it was for the best?_ My inner voice reasoned. _Your new job would have kept you apart._ Rory made me feel different; he made me feel wanted and special. He made the butterflies in my stomach explode with his words and addictive kisses. I had never been in a long distance relationship, would ours even last? My eyes slowly drifted to the ground as I blocked out all the sounds around me. I swear I could feel everyone staring at me. My heart was tearing itself in two. It was bound to happen eventually. I didn't have any other choice but to accept it.

"Is this what you've been trying to tell me? This whole time you knew but you never said anything?" We were outside behind the school, minutes before rehearsals were to start.

"I would have said something sooner," he took my hand. "I didn't know how to tell you." Rory pulled me into a tight hug. Forget rehearsals, I could have stayed like this for hours. Rory pulled back and kissed my forehead. "Are you upset with me?" he asked.

I looked up at him and shook my head, "No."


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: We're getting closer to the end! Three more chapters to go everyone. It's been a great ride. Hopefully I can finish this before move-in day, but that's starting to seem unlikely. I have so many stories planned, and I hope I will have the time to write them. It'll just take time and patience. (: Enjoy the performance chapter!**

I was on freak-out mode when the final full week of April had arrived. Wednesday through Saturday was our performances. Tonight was opening night. I hadn't slept at all last night. I walked through the halls like a zombie. Apparently I was the only one behaving this way, all the other cast members were excited and thrilled for the show at seven. I wanted to find the nearest dark hole and cry in it. This was really happening. All those rehearsals had led to this one moment. I didn't think I could handle all the pressure that would soon be on me.

Rory and I walked down the hall, passing by plenty of posters and colored papers that littered the wall; advertising tonight's show. Rory noticed my unease. He took my hand and kissed it as we continued towards the choir room for our final class of the day. With all the play rehearsals we had been doing, New Directions didn't have any time to practice or brainstorm for Nationals. I got butterflies just thinking about it; I'd die if we actually won. The rest of the seniors and I want nothing more than to win. If we won, it would mean something to this school. It would show them all that singing and dancing wasn't lame or uncool at all.

Of course, everyone had smiles on their faces as they talked amongst themselves. I was sure that I didn't need to ask to know what they were talking about. "Aren't you at least a little excited, Christine?" Rachel asked me. Rory went ahead and took a seat while Rachel stopped me before I could join him. "It's normal to be nervous; you've never done anything like this before."

"Maybe you should do this instead of me," I told her. "What if I mess up? What if I forget the lines?"

Rachel tightly held the sides of my arms; she stared directly into my eyes. This was one of her serious moments, I noticed. I listened intently to what she had to say. "Christine, you got this. You know this musical forwards and backwards. Phantom is your second love while journalism is the first. It means something to you." Of course she was right. Phantom meant something to me… and my dad. If it hadn't been for him I wouldn't have been introduced to the musical. It had been my birth mother's favorite before she passed away. Clutching onto Phantom was the one way I could feel connected to both my mother… and my father now that he's passed.

I would do this for them. I would make them proud if they really were watching down on me. "You're right," I told her, nodding. Even though I reassured myself various times about knowing I'll do well, the nerves wouldn't stop. I had a feeling they wouldn't leave me alone until I was finally on stage performing.

"I'm always right," she said.

"That's pretty much true," Kurt said, appearing by her side. "Even if you're freaking out now, you're gonna do amazing. All those rehearsals have led to this moment. Everyone's saying it Christine, you're great! You're going to do well during the actual performance."

Their kind words made my heart swell. I placed a hand over my chest and smiled weakly. "Thanks you guys." Our sappy friendship moment was cut short as Mr. Schuster entered the room. Everyone returned to his or her seats as he began talking about how proud he was at us, for pushing ourselves to make this musical possible. We didn't spend long on the topic because we jumped right into talk of Nationals. This year they were going to be held in Chicago; instead of taking a flight out, we were going to be taking a road trip.

My nerves subsided as we began brainstorming possible vintage songs. We only needed one to fulfill the requirement for the competition. Not many of us knew what to choose as a vintage song, so we had Mr. Schuster spit ball some ideas. Aside from the theme, we were left with another group number and a solo. Since we all wanted to win, Rachel was our best choice to sing the solo; not to mention it was her last shot at being in the spotlight. Somehow we also managed to decide that the Trouble Tones should do one of the group performances, since many people seemed to enjoy listening to them. We all agreed.

Rachel was busy coming up with a solo while the rest of the class was still trying to decide on the vintage song. It took majority of the class before we came up with only one of the three songs we needed for Nationals; Edge of Glory by Lady Gaga, performed by the Trouble Tones. "See you all tonight," Mr. Schuster called out as we gathered up our belongings. "Remember; show up at five so we can do a basic run through before the show at seven. Please don't be late!"

As I predicted, the nerves returned. Most of us were heading over to Finn and Kurt's home to waste time before we had to head back to the school. Rose said she'd meet up with me before the show started. Kurt called the get together a small pre-show party. There was music, but no dancing. There were drinks (of the non-alcoholic kind) and snacks. Rory and I stood in the corner of the room, he was reassuring me that things would run smoothly. He also told me to pretend the audience wasn't there, to think of this as another rehearsal. As we leaned in for a kiss, Kurt swooped in and pulled Rory and I away from the corner of the room to rejoin the party.

* * *

><p>The ladies and I were backstage applying the last of our make-up and hurrying into our costumes. My hands were trembling, so I had Rachel doing my make-up. This was really happening! I glanced at the clock; the show started in fifteen minutes. My stomach went overboard with the twists and knots; it was very uncomfortable. Rachel and a few others went on and on to reassure me with their kind words. "Christine!" I heard someone shout. I stood up from the stool and smiled as I saw Rose walking towards me. In her hand she held a small bouquet of yellow and pink tulips.<p>

"Now I know I'm not supposed to give these to you yet," she said, "but I really didn't feel like holding them for a two hour show." Rose handed the bouquet over before she engulfed me in a bear hug. "You're going to do amazing," she whispered in my ear. "Your dad would be so proud," she pulled back and rubbed my shoulders. I said nothing as I tried my best to keep from crying. I could feel the muscles in my face quivering. Rose kissed my cheek before vanishing through the thin crowd of cast members and stage crew.

My dad would be proud. Thinking of that made my nerves quiet down. I was no longer trembling. A hand tapped me on the shoulder. I turned and grinned when I saw Rory. "Ready?" he asked me.

Slowly I nodded. Rory leaned in to kiss me again, since last time it was interrupted. When I felt his lips on mine I smiled. We pulled away quickly when Mr. Schuster called us all to attention. Rachel slid up beside me and held my hand, squeezing it reassuringly. Mister Schuster's speech brought him close to tears while the rest of us merely smiled and shifted from side to side with nerves and excitement. All of our work was about to pay off for these next four days.

We fled to our places. I peeked from the side stage curtain and watched as the room and the stage darkened, signaling the start of the show. I bit my lip and smiled; now realizing that I wanted this. I worked my butt off to get this far, and I would give these people a show they would remember.

* * *

><p>Everything was running smoothly, and once I had started singing my nerves were gone. It was as if we were just doing another rehearsal. Two hours later and we were down to the final scene of the play. The one that brings me to tears every single time I either watch or think about it. Mike was mask-less, and I had to give kudos to the artist behind the deformation design. Seeing it up close kind of freaked me out. "<em>Down once more to the dungeon of my black despair! Down we plunge to the prison of my mind! Down that path into darkness deep as hell!<em>" He continued speaking, or singing, his lines as he dragged me down the pretend hallway. "_Hounded out by everyone! Met with hatred everywhere! No kind work from anyone! No compassion anywhere! Christine, Christine why? Why?_"

Once the two of us were off stage, I had two minutes to change out of the Don Juan costume and into the wedding dress. It was almost exact to the dress worn in the actual shows of Phantom. Rachel stole to my side and quickly helped me into the dress and into a new pair of shoes. I nearly tripped as Mike and I spotted our cue to head back onto the stage. I acted flustered and angry as I sang. "_Have you gorged yourself at last in your lust for blood? Am I now to be prey to your lust for flesh?_"

"_That fate, which condemns me to wallow in blood has also denied me the joys of the flesh… this face—the infection which poisons our love…_" Mike clutched the wedding veil in his hands and turned to the side. "_This face which earned a mother's fear and loathing… a mask, my first; unfeeling scrap of clothing…_" He turned his attention back to me and took long strides. His tone became harsh within seconds. "_Pity comes too late—turn around and face your fate: an eternity of this before your eyes!_" He slammed down the veil over my head. I helped adjust it so it wouldn't fall off. As he sang, he grabbed me by the shoulders and forced me to look at him.

We had rehearsed this scene countless times; it was going very well. Softly I sang, "_This haunted face holds no horror for me now… it's in your _soul_ that the true distortion lies._"

Following through with the scene, Raoul, aka Blaine, entered. From there everything according to the play was flipped upside down. As Raoul had the Phantom's noose tied around his neck, I was thrown onto the ground singing my most favorite of lines from the play. "_The tears I might have shed for your dark fate grow cold, and turn to tears of hate!_" We all began singing our lines over each other. I ripped off the veil and tossed it on the ground, still singing along with the others.

"_You deceived me! I gave my mind blindly_." I fell to my knees and stared up at Mike. He neared the edge of the stage and stood there silently as I continued. "_Pitiful creature of darkness… what kind of life have you known?_" Slowly I rose to my feet and walked up behind him. "_God, give me courage to show you… you are not alone._" This was the scene that made my heart turn to mush. We kissed twice. Mike's Phantom pushed me back gently and looked surprised. The three minute silent scene carried out as Mike's character had a minor revelation about the fine line between obsession and love. Raoul was freed from his noose, and the final minutes continued.

Already I could feel the tears pricking my eyes; just in time too. "_Go! Go now—go now and leave me!_" Blaine and I vanished off stage. Mike turned to the figurine of the monkey playing the cymbals and sadly sang to it. The tears in my eyes fell down my face as I walked back out onto the stage. I took off the ring I was given during the Don Juan scene and held it out to Mike, who was now standing. "_Christine, I love you…_"

Sadly, I turned my gaze to the floor before dropping my hand. I turned and didn't glance over my shoulder. "_Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime… say the word and I will follow you._"

Blaine appeared and sang as well, "_Share each day with me._"

"_Each night, each morning…_" He took my hand and led me off stage for a final time. From the sidelines Blaine and I watched as Mike belted out the final two lines of the musical.

"_You alone can make my song take flight—it's over now the music of the night!_"

The rest was silence. After the Phantom had vanished and Meg (Tina) found his mask, the crowd erupted into cheers when the stage darkened once more. Rachel tackled me from the side, "That was amazing!"

"You better get out there for your section," I warned her. In groups the cast fled onto the stage to take their bows. Blaine, Mike and I would be going one at a time since we were the main characters of the show. Blaine went out as Mr. Schue gave him the signal. The cheers were louder than they had been. Mike went next, and the volume was turned up a notch. My heart was pounding and my palms began to sweat. Mr. Schuster gave me the okay. I kept a pace as I walked onto the stage, not wanting to trip over my dress.

I was overwhelmed by the positive feedback and cheers. I smiled and spotted Rose over to the right, she gave me thumbs up and my smile widened. The cast and I came together, joining hands for the last three bows of the night before we filed off the stage.


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: My own little challenge. Let's see if I can finish this story by the end of next week. Two more chapters to go! Lot's of feelings to be felt from here on out. I hope you enjoy the prom chapter, and stay tuned! The ending just might make you smile. (:**

"Dinosaurs," Brittany said. I wasn't the only one who gave her a "what did you just say," look. We were one week into May; the end of the year was upon us as was our Senior Prom and Nationals. "No one told me we had another prom this year, so I came up with our theme and our theme is dinosaurs." I'm sure it's never been done before… it seemed interesting and not as cheesy as 'starry night' or 'Paris.'

"This is extremely short notice," Mercedes muttered. "When is Prom?"

"Next week," Brittany said with a smile.

"You have got to be kidding me," Rachel said while Quinn busted out with, "Are you serious?"

"What's the problem? It's the last time we'll all be together; it doesn't have to be perfect or anything. It's just going to be a night of fun," Brittany said. I was really debating whether or not I wanted to go, but as I glanced over at Rory I changed my mind. Our time together was slowly decreasing. Soon he and I would be going our separate ways. My heart ached just thinking about it, we were very close and only getting closer. I wasn't even sure what my feelings were doing. I sighed and half-listened as Brittany continued to talk about the basics of Prom; she wanted to round some of us up to help with the decoration committee.

When she finished speaking, Mr. Schuster brought us back to the topic of Nationals. Thus far we managed to have two songs, we were only missing a third which was the big group number. Rachel would be singing Celine Dion's "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" and the Trouble Tones would be singing Gaga's "Edge of Glory." "No one has any ideas?" Mr. Schuster asked.

We all glanced at each other and shrugged. Mr. Schuster sighed and began playing random songs while we sat and listened. Santana began edging Finn on about knowing music; Finn merely rolled his eyes and put on his thinking face, the one where he stares off into space with a deep frown. Rachel gently patted his arm in reassurance.

Rachel joined me by my locker after glee club. "So are you going to ask Rory? Since, you know, its _senior_ prom," she said.

"Most likely yes," I told her as I shut my locker. "Looks like the mall this weekend is going to be crazy." I sighed and leaned against the lockers. It was the end of the day and I was supposed to be meeting up with Rory for a coffee date. Maybe I'd ask him then. "And I assume Principal Figgins is going to want us to perform some songs for the night. And maybe this year's King and Queen winners won't be so uncalled for."

Rachel shrugged and spotted Finn. "Who knows? Anyways, we're going shopping this weekend whether you like it or not." She linked arms with Finn; I rolled my eyes and decided to wait for Rory outside. It was sunny, but there was a chilly breeze that made me hug myself. An arm wrapped around my shoulders, holding me close. A small smile began forming on my lips. Rory led the way down the main steps and off of the campus.

"So," I said, once we were seated with our tea and coffee cups. "Prom's next week…"

"I heard," he said, smiling.

My cheeks felt warm. I held the coffee cup with two hands as I glanced up at Rory. "I was kind of wondering if you wanted to go with me."

"Oh, were you planning on asking someone else?" he teased. I rolled my eyes.

"Looks like I'll have to find a back-up if you really don't want too," I warned playfully.

"Why not," he said. "It'll be fun… dinosaurs."

"I know, I wasn't expecting that either," I giggled. Rory and I lapsed into silence, but this wasn't the comfortable kind I was used to. Something was lingering in the air between us, and I had a feeling I knew what it was. "It'll be fun," he repeated. That feeling was returning the one where it felt like someone was squeezing my heart. Rory reached across the small table and took hold of one of my hands. My smile was weak while his was sympathetic. We were both thinking the same thing and we knew that deep down we had to go our separate ways, even if we didn't want too.

* * *

><p>As I suspected, the mall was packed with seniors from McKinley doing their week before Prom, prom shopping. Rachel and I watched in horror as girls attacked each other over the same dress. Alright, they didn't exactly attack each other, but that's what it pretty much would have looked like. There were lots of raised voices and pulling. Rachel and I visited six stores in counting; all of them were flooded with girls searching for the perfect dress. All that was left behind were the decent looking ones and the ones that might as well have been costumes.<p>

"We're never going to find anything," I told her as I pushed aside hangers of knee length dresses. It was hard, especially when you wanted to avoid having the same dress as someone else. There was no time to order from online because they took more than a week to ship out. "I may as well dig up last year's prom dress and wear that," I said. Rachel rolled her eyes and moved over to a different rack of dresses.

As I continued going through my rack, I stopped at one dress that looked like it didn't belong with the rest. This was floor-length and a lovely sea foam green, it was also very flow-y and strapless. I picked it up by the hanger and looked around the store for the same dress design. "It's a sign," Rachel said from her third rack of dresses. "What size is it?" I peeked into the dress and lifted the tag. It was my size… Maybe this was a sign. I feared that if I put it back, someone else would just whisk it away. It was one of a kind. I held the dress close to me, even the material was soft. The top bodice was coated in clear and light green studs.

Rachel didn't find her dress in this store. So before we left I purchased my "it's a sign" dress and walked out with a smile on my face. Rachel and I visited another two stored before we ran into Quinn, Santana, Brittany and Mercedes. Quinn (still in her wheelchair) had a bag hanging off the back of her chair. Mercedes and Brittany held various bags as well. We greeted the girls before Rachel pulled me away to help her look for a decent dress. "What exactly are you looking for?" I asked her.

"Something classy, but also elegant, I don't want anything flashy," she said, keeping her eyes on the racks of new dresses. Ten minutes later, I glanced over at Rachel and she was already holding three dresses over her arm. I shook my head and slowly pushed aside hangers once more. "How are things between you and Rory?" her voice brought me back. "The end of the year is almost here…"

"We know," I said. "We're trying to spend as much time together as possible." My heart started aching again. Rachel noticed the sadness on my face. She gave me a side-hug, since one arm was taken over by heavy dresses. "I like him a lot Rachel, like… I think I really, really _like_ him."

"Oh, Christine," she said. Her eyes softened. "Everything will work out, I just know it."

I really wanted to believe her, but I just couldn't bring myself to do so. Rachel was right about most things, but I had a feeling that this wasn't going to be one of them.

* * *

><p>Rory and I walked into the gymnasium, arms linked. It wasn't the gymnasium any longer; we were all thrown back into prehistoric times. Exotic plastic plants were everywhere to give a jungle vibe. There were even dinosaur figurines all over the place. Everything was well decorated; I had to admit I was surprised. Rory and I smiled at each other as we moved farther into the room. We managed to grab three tables, but none of us spent the time sitting down. We were on our feet, dancing to the DJ's tunes. "Hey, don't forget to vote for your Prom King and Queen! Polls are still open for another hour."<p>

I had voted with much difficulty. Santana, Brittany and Quinn had been very persuasive. In the end I managed to vote for Finn and Quinn. It was a little strange to be doing so since Finn and Rachel were together, but since Quinn didn't win last year I thought, why not? Rory went to get us some drinks. I spotted Coach Sylvester keeping a close eye on the punch bowl for any possible spikers. Mr. Schuster had us all come up with at least one song to sing with a partner, in a group or solo for the Prom. I would be singing backup with Tina while Mercedes sang an Adele number; for now Santana was on stage singing "Love You Like a Love Song."

Rory and I sat down beside each other, tired from the dancing. "I'll be back," he said. "I have to meet the others for the next number." Rory kissed me on the cheek before he took off through the crowd. I smiled and listened as the music died away and the catchy boy-band tune started up. Rachel pulled me to my feet and dragged me to the front of the crowd with the other ladies. I was never much a fan of this song, they played "What Makes You Beautiful" far too often on the radio, but it was still a good time.

It was only ten and prom ended in another hour. They hadn't played many slow songs, and I was kind of bummed out about that. Rory and I took our portrait on the giant, rocking dinosaur. We took a few group pictures as well. "They're announcing the King and Queen," Rachel pulled me and I pulled Rory. He took my hand as Figgins read the winner of the King. "Finn Hudson." Though it wasn't the King that surprised everyone, yet again it was the winner of the Queen that did. After Santana stormed off the stage, everyone held their breath for the winner.

"Rachel Berry." Last time I checked, Rachel wasn't nominated. I smiled anyways and pushed her gently on her shoulder. She won… how? I don't even know. After everything she went through, Rachel deserved this more than any one of those nominees. The crowd of students pushed themselves back and formed a circle around the pair as they danced. Slowly others began joining in and pretty soon Rory and I were slow dancing for the third time that night.

He held me close enough that I could hear the soft thumping of his heart as my head rested against his chest. I closed my eyes as we swayed. I didn't want these four minutes to end. I didn't want him to leave, and I knew that he didn't want to leave either. He made me feel happy whenever I was having a bad day or whenever no one else could find a way to cheer me up. I liked him more than a simple crush or flourish of feelings… I cared about him and I loved the way he cared about me… I loved him.

I pulled my head away and looked up at him. He smiled at me and kissed me. I blushed as we pulled away. "Rory," I said quietly. "I—" I couldn't bring myself to say it, and I didn't know why. Rory furrowed his brows as he listened to me. "I—I'm glad I met you."

I'm sure that's not what he wanted to hear. It sure as hell wasn't what I wanted to say.


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: One more chapter to go. Excuse me while I become emotional. A bucket for my tears, anyone need to borrow it? Well, this chapter consists of a lot of reflection, also, graduation. I didn't follow the episode, I moved graduation to the football field and that part was rather short. I didn't get so into it because it wasn't necessary! Anyways, enjoy and stay tuned for the conclusion to _All I Ask of You_. It's been fun! (:**

This was it, the home stretch. In just three short days I along with the rest of the seniors would be graduating. I stared at the graduation gown hanging in my closet. It was McKinley red and stood out against all the other clothes. I could have sworn that just yesterday Rachel and I were butting heads for the role of Christine Daae. No, it was mid-May. I turned my attention to my laptop; it was a gift from Rose after I immediately told her the news of my acceptance with the New York Journal. This laptop and I would experience a lot of things, I could already feel it. But before I could write entries about new experiences of exotic locations, there was one thing school-bound that I still had to do: compose my final article for the McKinley paper.

I stepped away from my closet and sat at my desk. My laptop was open to a document with only the title _Goodbye, McKinley_ and my name underneath. I had to admit, I was stuck. This would be going in tomorrow's edition. My last edition before I hand over the paper to a junior (who I was surprised to find was just as dedicated as me). Things at McKinley changed ever since New Directions won Nationals. We won Nationals! It still sounds like a dream whenever I think about it, but then I stare at the trophy and know that it wasn't a dream. Out of all the performances we've put together, National's was the best.

I remember biting my nails vigorously as the commentator began to slowly announce the second and third place winners. My heart stopped when he announced New Directions for first place. Everything went silent for a few seconds before I could hear the shouts and cheers. Rachel and Kurt practically squeezed the life out of me. I'll also admit that Rory and I shared a very passionate kiss… one of those in the moment kind of things.

I spun around in my desk chair, thinking of some possible way I could start my final article. The idea was to talk about my times at McKinley and to inspire the future of the paper to live on. There was so much I wanted to say, but I didn't know where to begin. I hovered my fingers over the keyboard, staring at the blinking vertical line on the document. This was due tomorrow… I couldn't delay it any more.

The seniors' last day was this past Monday, Graduation was on Saturday which makes today Wednesday. Even though I wasn't exactly a part of the staff, I was still allowed to print out one last article before I left McKinley for good. Rachel had been calling and texting me on and off all day. I told her it was important that I got this finished, but of course she ignored my requests. Last week when she received her NYADA notice letter, she was accepted. I have never seen her more happy than right then. Her future hadn't been destroyed after all.

I pushed myself away from the desk, letting the chair glide across the wooden floors of my room. Nothing was coming to mind. Everything I wanted to say was all jumbled up in one big pile. I groaned and began spinning the chair yet again. The nausea took over so I stopped. I was home alone; Rose was at work and I was up here trying to type out this article. Tina told me to send it to her when I finished and edited it. She would put it in the paper and send me a copy once it was all printed out.

_I've been with this paper since my freshman year, aka the year the McKinley High School Paper was resurrected. Who did the resurrection you may ask? It was me. For as long as I can recall, I enjoyed forming my own stories on basic topics. I liked getting my own opinion out there and on paper. I liked telling people important stories through my writing voice. I discovered this passion in middle school and I knew that once I reached high school I would take it more seriously, but still have fun with it._

I turned my head over to my closet. The first thing I spotted was the graduation gown, and then I remembered the stack of papers I had of the McKinley paper. I've kept all of them since my first published article from freshman year. Looking back on the things I have written, the one thing I notice immediately was how my writing improved. There was a dramatic change through the years of the paper. I had three boxes full of these things hiding in my closet. I made a little reminder to move these up to the attic before I left on my first job. Speaking of my job, I wondered where they would be sending me first… I've received various e-mails with documents that I needed to fill out and sign, also reminders of future e-mails they would be sending me.

I wouldn't move to New York until a few days after Rachel. Looks like Rachel and I would be there together after all. Unfortunately it seemed that Kurt would be joining us later on after we've settled in. Rachel and I discussed more than enough times on how we were going to rent out an apartment together. It sounded like fun, even if I wasn't going to be there much.

_Over the years I've been here, bullying had been the biggest issue. I remember writing more than a hundred articles on the topic alone while I've been on the paper. I'm glad to see some things changing though; better late than never, right? You should never judge someone just because they have different interests than you do, whether it be girls or boys, singing or dancing, acting, writing, playing sports… there's always going to be some kind of common ground. I'm proud to be a part of that change, along with the rest of the glee club members. Who would've thought that a simple win could change things dramatically?_

I turned on some tunes, cranking up the volume to one that I wasn't usually comfortable with. I needed more ideas; I needed to get my words in line. I ended up getting away from my laptop, wandering the house as my music echoed from upstairs. I needed a good distraction, but at the same time I needed to sit in front of my laptop and get this done. Tina's deadline was for tonight at ten. I still had well over seven hours until then.

_This year I did something really stupid. When I should have been having fun, I gave myself more than enough restrictions on a lot of things. I came up with thirteen stupid rules that I ended up breaking in my own ways. Let me tell you, I'm so happy that I did. The reasons behind these rules can go un-announced; I'm sure none of you would care about my failed relationships and weak feelings. I can only imagine how dull my life would be right now if I had continued to listen to my rules and not to my friends. Don't restrict yourself from everything, "If you're going through hell, keep going."_

_I lost someone very close to me this year. I managed to get close to someone and eventually form a relationship. I was chosen to play Christine Daae in my favorite musical of all time. I was a part of a group of people who managed to start a chain reaction at this school. I would love to share with you my list of ridiculous rules, but I burned that list before I even thought of sharing it with you all. Some I regretted ever coming up with, but only a few made sense to obey._

_I'm going to miss writing for this paper, but all good things must come to an end. Instead of heading off to college I'll be traveling the world as an amateur journalist for the New York Journal. College isn't completely written out of my future, I'm sure I'd go back for a degree when things decide to quiet down. I'm rather excited to see my dreams coming true; people are right when they tell you to stick your mind to what you want, because then, anything is possible._

Four hours later, I smiled at the document. I saved it and decided not to edit this bit of work. I wanted the students to read my real voice, not some proper, edited version of it. I attached the document to an e-mail and then sent it off to Tina. By the end of the day tomorrow she would drop off the final issue of the paper that I would add to my very large collection. I turned around in my seat and stared at the red gown once more.

* * *

><p>"Congratulations class of two thousand twelve!" The graduated seniors and I erupted into cheers and threw our caps into the air. It was a lovely pre-summer day as we sat outside on the football field. The stands were filled with friends and family. I had invited Rory, but he declined saying there were some things he needed to take care of. His departure date was a couple of days away and my heart was slowly tearing into two. I still hadn't told him how I really felt. Whenever we were together and I thought the time was right, I would say something completely different.<p>

I hated myself for it. If I didn't act now, it would be too late and he would never know how I really felt. The same thought always invaded my mind; did he feel the same way about me? I was never good with this kind of thing, hence why I ended up making that first rule at the end of my junior year. I retrieved my cap from the ground and stood up from the folding chairs. I found my friends getting ready for a group photo. Rachel pulled me in just in time for the flash to go off. We hugged each other tightly. I told myself not to cry, we would see each other in just a few days in New York… "We did it!" she whispered to me.

"I know," I said in return. There was a lot of hugging, crying and picture snapping right after that. I told myself not to think of Rory. We would see each other later anyways; he said he wanted to take me out for a celebratory coffee and tea. He told me it was lame, but I reassured him that it was perfect.

I received a bouquet of flowers from Rose. We took pictures together and quietly mentioned my dad. I didn't feel sad, I felt proud to be his daughter. Even though he wasn't here, I managed to do all the things we had planned for me. Rose wrapped her arm over my shoulders and held me close as we walked away from the crowds.

"We probably shouldn't have waited so long to do all that packing," she said. We giggled on our way to the car.


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: Full author's note below. Enjoy the final chapter of "All I Ask of You!"**

When he wasn't busy living out the rest of his American lifestyle as a Junior, Rory and I spent every minute together up until the end of the school year. The weekend that followed was his departure. Kurt offered to take me to the airport to say a few final goodbyes before Rory left. These past two weeks had been super emotional for me as it had been for him. I was _in love_ with him, like Rachel was in love with Finn. I never thought it would happen, but it did.

As we spent all that time together, I chickened out and let myself refuse to tell him how I really felt. It was eating away at me; I couldn't officially take off until I got this one thing off my chest. It would haunt me forever, especially if I never saw him again. Rory's flight left at three, it was one now. He was probably sitting in the airport waiting for his flight and for me. I anxiously paced the living room, waiting for Kurt's arrival. Rose had work to attend to for the weekend, leaving me home alone.

Outside I heard a car horn blare. I peeked out the window and spotted Kurt's car. Quickly I grabbed the house keys before making my way outside. Kurt wasn't the only one in the car, Rachel was there with Finn. I rolled my eyes as I hopped into the passenger's side. "We wanted to say goodbye too," Rachel said as I glanced back at her and Finn. A small smile played at my lips before I turned around as Kurt took off.

Majority of the car ride was quiet, and I was thankful for it. I was able to get lost in my thoughts on the hour car ride to the airport. I reflected on all my time spent with Rory. My heart ached with longing to return to those moments. I didn't want him to leave. I could think that as much as I wanted, but it wouldn't change anything. He was leaving; he couldn't stay for another year. I tried to reason with myself that this wasn't horrible. Let's be honest, if he did stay for another year I wouldn't even be here. I would be traveling to exotic islands, countries and cities, doing the one thing I love most; journalism.

I could visit if I had too… and we could always keep in touch. I just don't think we could make a long distance relationship last. "Christine," Kurt's voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I glanced at him and noticed the car was parked. Rachel and Finn weren't in the car. Kurt smiled sympathetically at me before getting out of the car, slowly I followed. The airport was busy like all airports were; people bustled about with their suitcases. Ticket lines stretched from one end to the other and security was everywhere. "Christine!" I quickly spotted my friends and made my way through the crowds to follow them.

We took the long way around to the international departures. I glanced at the clocks on the wall which only gave me fifteen minutes before Rory's flight departed. My heart began pounding in my chest as we all picked up our pace and walked towards his gate number. The flight departing for Ireland was small. Everyone minded their own business as they sat quietly, waiting to be called on to start seating. "Rory!" I said when I spotted him standing beside his carryon. He must have made it with enough time to spare because he was putting away extra papers and retrieving his ticket and passport.

Rory turned around, his solemn expression quickly turned into a smile. It warmed my heart to see him happy. Rachel, Finn, Kurt and I crowded around him. Each of us took turns saying our goodbyes and of course I went last. Rachel hugged Rory as did Kurt. It was Finn who took a little longer. Finn had been Rory's first friend upon his arrival at McKinley. When the two shared a brotherly hug, Finn stepped back and went to join Rachel and Kurt who were a good distance away.

I said nothing; instead I quickly grabbed Rory and pulled him into a hug. On any other day I would have blushed with all the people around, but I ignored them completely and they didn't take much notice in us either. Rory held me tighter but not past the point of squeezing me until I couldn't breathe. While we were still in embrace, I kissed him gingerly on the cheek. I let my lips linger there for a moment before I finally whispered into his ear. "Rory, I never had the chance to say this… I was scared of rejection… but I love you."

Rory pulled back slightly and smiled down at me softly. I could feel the tears beginning to well up in my eyes; it took a lot to hold them back. I didn't want this moment to be a sad one. Rory hadn't answered, and that immediately made me feel like a complete fool. Maybe he hadn't felt the same. Still, it felt good to get it off my chest, but I wanted him to feel the same in return. His lips found mine. The kiss was soft and gentle, but filled with passion. We broke apart and he whispered into my ear the words I had been so longing to hear. "And I love you, Christine."

It felt as though someone were squeezing my heart again. I was so thrilled and relieved that he felt the same way. I brought his lips back down on mine once more; that is when the flight attendants called for the passengers to begin boarding. I pulled away; the tears welled up in my eyes and made everything blurry. When the first few tears slid down my face, Rory used his thumb to wipe them away. "Don't cry," he whispered. He kissed my forehead and pulled me into one final hug. "Don't cry. We'll keep in touch."

I smiled sadly. We pulled away for a final time as the flight attendant called out once more for passengers to board the plane. I felt weak on my own two feet. Rory's hand slowly began letting go of my own as he stepped away. I resisted the urge to run after him and keep him from leaving, but I had to let go, no matter how hard it hurt. I watched until I could no longer see him; from the moment he gave the flight attendant his ticket to scan, to when he looked at me one last time before vanishing from my line of sight.

_Don't cry_, his words echoed in my head. _Don't cry_. I took deep breaths and tried to remain standing. I felt two hands on my shoulders, knowing it was my friends. The doors to the boarding platforms had closed. Rachel was the first to engulf me into a hug. I wasn't surprised to see her in tears; she was a sucker for romantics. Kurt was next and Finn was last. Together we made our way out of the airport. My mind wandered back to Rory, wondering how he was holding up and if he was trying to listen to the advice he had given me.

_We'll keep in touch_, he had said. The car ride back home was quiet as well. Kurt dropped me off first and Rachel said she'd stop by tonight for an unplanned sleepover. I picked up the mail on my way into the house. I flipped through the stack of letters as I walked into the kitchen. Rose still wasn't home, which I was glad for. I didn't want her to see me all upset and mopey for the rest of the night. She didn't exactly understand just how close Rory and I really were. Of all the letters, only one was addressed to me. It was from the New York Journal.

I didn't hesitate to open the letter. This must have been my first assignment! I bit my lip, unfolding the letter and quickly reading it. _Dear Miss Christine Fay, we are thrilled that you will be joining our travel staff and we hope that you are too._ Most of the first couple of paragraphs praised me on my writings and how I would be able to perfect my writing even more. They loved my heart, and that made me smile. _We are pleased to inform you ahead of time where your first destination will take you. You will not be traveling to this destination until your summer training has been complete._ There was information and dates on my training that I already knew about from previous e-mails.

I skipped to the end where they saved the best for last. I would have laughed at the cliché, but I couldn't have been happier after reading the destination. I would be there during the winter season, which I could have cared less about. I was going to be able to see him; a lot sooner than I anticipated, but all the same I couldn't have asked for anything more. Work comes first, of course, but I would still be able to see him. Immediately I wanted to text him or call him, but he was on a six hour flight across the Atlantic. At least I was no longer upset or sad.

I don't exactly believe in signs, fate or miracles. Sometimes things happen, and you just have to go with it. I held the letter close to my chest with a smile on my face. _Ireland, here I come! Rory, see you soon._

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><p><strong>AN: It's alright if you cried. I did while I was writing this. This is how I wanted it to end, and I apologize if it isn't what you wanted or were expecting, but this is my story. I want to thank all of you for reading and reviewing and making this story a favorite of yours. I especially want to thank those who stuck with me since the beginning. This story wouldn't have been possible if I didn't have all of you wanting me to write more. (: It was motivational. Anyways, the end! I have left this open for a possible mini spin-off which I might visit in the future. Just not right now. I have another Glee story under way involing no OCs. It will be titled "Wild Times" and take place in the twenties. More info on my profile.**

**Adieu my lovelies!**


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